FYI, Guys Really Don't Want to Marry The Kinds of Women I Keep Seeing in Summer Blockbusters

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  Posted by J.J.M. Wed Jul 1, 2009 11:00am PDT

  First off, I thought knocked up was a horrible movie. But that's a preference, I haven't liked any Seth Rogan movie, I'm a fan of dry humor, his always seems to weave its way back to drug/alcohol/sex humor. His jokes just can't make me laugh or even crack a smile.

  But that controlling wife thing isn't what guys really want, but it's more a satirical view of how single guys see their committed friend's girlfriends. As a single guy with no commitments, you'll see a guy's new girlfriend as the downer who's constantly taking your friend's time away from you. She keeps him from doing fun things with your group. You generally don't see that as a fun person.

  Sure, you'll support him and say "Good for you two!" but deep down, you wish she'd catch on fire. Asking you what her boyfriend did on such and so trip, trying to be "one of the guys", and wanting to go on every guys night out to supervise their boyfriend. They mean well, they just want to be with their new guy and enjoy the early time when things are still hot... to a single guy, a buddy's new girlfriend is like a rash. Annoying, difficult to get rid of, and once you think it's gone it keeps popping back up in the weirdest places.

  To a single guy, a buddy getting married is pretty much the equivalent of him dying. Just like with a friend in a fresh grave, you'll never be able to do stuff with him, you're doing well if you can visit him once a week, and you usually can't visit him late at night without getting yelled at.

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  Posted by None Wed Jul 1, 2009 11:09am PDT

  Who are you kidding "Married Jake" Its exactly what you all want. A mom & -- you know the rest, wow, "J.J.M" a bit harsh, and I thought I was the "negative" one. Insecurities much?

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  Posted by None Wed Jul 1, 2009 11:11am PDT

  But I also hate comedies, and ones that have things like Kumar and joke boy go to White Castle, are just nasty and not even funny, I have fallen in love with the Wayans Bros movies, they are crude, but funny, and not overly sexual. I like movies too that imitate others, for some reason, LOL, except I bought "Date Movie," that sucked, so I stick to horror & action for me.

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  Posted by J.J.M. Wed Jul 1, 2009 11:18am PDT

  None, I suppose if I didn't have so many insecurities I wouldn't be single. Insecure about my weight, height, glasses, hands, feet, ears, eyes, nose, legs, arms, hair, body hair, facial hair.. I'm far too concerned with every single other aspect of myself to have normal guy insecurities like penile length and muscle mass.

  Not that I really ever do anything to maintain or change anything about my insecurities, I've grown comfortable in being insecure.

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  Posted by Sweet T Wed Jul 1, 2009 11:43am PDT

  WOW. I think Married Jake is actually pretty spot on. No man wants the controlling shrew, just as no man wants the doormat. J.J.M., I feel a little sorry for you. Your experiences with lame women and your friends' lame GFs and wives must really be plaguing you, and I don't blame you. It sucks how easily some people are willing to settle. OR, could it be that your pals who get married (or choose to die, as you put it) have actually found someone who fulfills the need we all have for a partner? Maybe you have some envy towards them and their happiness? I'm not judging, I'm just saying, when you see other people who no longer have to be "on the search," it can be frustrating. I felt the same way before I came to be with my SO.

  My SO came 500 miles to get me, not because I asked him to, but because he wasn't about to let the best thing in his life slip away. I'm not saying I'm the best woman ever, but we match, so we basically didn't have a choice; we fell in love, wanted to be together, and he sped up the process by 4 months because he wanted to show me A) he is willing to do anything to be with me; B) he CAN live without me, but sees no point to it; and C) he literally has never felt this way about anyone. I feel the exact same way about him on all three points.

  He has spent a lot less time alone with his friends, but they all get it, and if they don't, too bad. He made his choice, and anyone not on board or who has a problem with it gets held at arm's length or cut out. It's the same thing with me and my pals: the people who have been harsh are the ones who don't get it; they've never felt this kind of love, so how can they be expected to? And honestly, my best friends love him, his best friends love me, and they see we make each other happy. Good friends want to see each other happy, and my SO and I are really a perfect match (not perfect people, mind you, but we fit, ya know?). Our friends appreciate that, and, though it was hard to leave all of my pals behind, it's worth it for my soul mate/partner in crime/love of my life. And hanging out with his friends is a bonus for them, because we have a dang good time together, and I'm a good addition to the group. They know it and appreciate it, as I appreciate their being so welcoming towards me.

  And even though he's spent less time alone with his friends, now that I'm moved in and we've gotten the house in order for the most part, he's free to do as he wishes. If he wants a night with the guys, he's welcome to do so whenever he wants; I like my nights with the girls, too. The difference is that we would rather be together than out with other people. I don't need to watch over him; part of being in true love is having trust for the other person. I can't say I don't get insecure or possessive at times, but we talk about it and have a good laugh about my irrationality, and then we move on and enjoy our life together.

  I felt the way you did, None, until this happened to me. Now I understand that when you really love someone, the b.s. labels go out the window and you make it work for yourselves. It's a pleasure to do things for him, domestically, sexually, spiritually, etc.; it's reciprocated, so I sure don't feel like I'm losing out or being taken advantage of.

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  Posted by Jo Wed Jul 1, 2009 11:47am PDT

  JJ, you should come to f2bbs.com.

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  Posted by Zom-B Wed Jul 1, 2009 12:31pm PDT

  Most mainstream comedies, especially of the romantic variety, create "characters" that are overblown cardboard cutouts and perpetuate the most idiotic, often baseless stereotypes of both men and women. It's insulting to both genders, and it wouldn't surprise me if consumption of these types of films contributed to massive misunderstandings and screwed-up relationships.

  People get so angry at me when I diss these kinds of movies for some reason. They often claim I have no sense of humor or I take things too seriously. No, I DO have a sense of humor; it's just that I laugh at things that are actually FUNNY. Romantic comedies are DEPRESSING, not funny...why on Earth would I want to watch something that actively encourages my worst feelings about women and past relationships and has dopey, trivial-minded male characters I can't relate to in any way? They make me feel like the human race is little better than animals.

  And why the heck do so many women like these ridiculous things? I keep trying to tell myself negative stereotypes are WRONG...but then so many women lap up this retarded drivel. If I were female, I'd be tearing my hair out over the female characters...both "good" AND "bad".

  Maybe Rousseau was right....maybe the theater DOES cause moral rot and corruption.

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  Posted by Doktor Eevol Wed Jul 1, 2009 2:01pm PDT

  I watched knocked up ONCE - and just because I was held hostage by one of my friends (this same friend later subjected me to Twilight... blech).

  pffft what a waste of time. I'll never get those four hours of my life back. Plus, they encourage double standards. Where are the movies written about a not so good looking heavy woman who ends up romantically entangled with a hot, career blossoming man? Hmmm? People would probably watch it to see any chance to scream gold digger, but it's ok if a broke slob of a man is the one who benefits from a one night stand.

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  Posted by Chela Wed Jul 1, 2009 3:40pm PDT

  KNOCKED UP WAS HILARIOUS, YOU ARE ALL HATERS!!

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  Posted by Doktor Eevol Wed Jul 1, 2009 3:55pm PDT

  Marcy M... quite right. I hate willful stupidity.

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