Love + Sex
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Have You Reached Your "I Want To Be Married" Age?
partner
You
already told us what age you want to get married, but
are any of you freaking out that you've reached that age and
you aren't even dating anyone?
My girlfriend was telling me how upset she is for her upcoming
29th birthday because she always wanted to be married by
that age. She's frustrated because she hasn't
had a serious boyfriend in years, and she doubts she is going to
meet someone and get engaged within the next month (Hey,
Khloe did it)! But in all seriousness, she's
stressing out because she randomly picked this age years ago as her
"I'll be married by then" goal, and now she feels
like she's failed at her life "to-do" list.
I can relate: I hate when I set a goal for myself and then miss
it, but I told her that marriage can't be given a due date. I
know that quick advice didn't help 100 percent, so I told her
to focus her energy on something else. And I'm so
impressed—instead of dwelling on her birthday as a day to feel like
a failure for missing her personal deadline, now she's throwing
herself a "30 minus 1" birthday party.
Have you reached your "I Want To Be Married"
age? What was it? Did you set a new date, or did you decide to just
let it happen when it happens?
P.S.
Would you let your guy plan your wedding?
Do you want to live with your guy before getting married, and
will you (or did you) change your name when you get
married?
MORE FROM SMITTEN:
Related: weddings, relationships, age
-
Posted by another hockey fan Mon Oct 12, 2009 9:57am PDT
One can get married young, and then get divorced and wonder why they hell they were so anxious to get married the first time. Take it from me. I'm on my second marriage after being married the first time at 24. I didn't have a set time as I never wanted kids, but I was typical wanting that "fantasy wedding". Anyhow, I waited a long time to marry again and with the grace of God, married the RIGHT man at 44. He was well worth the wait and no one should EVER settle for a man because he's hot, he makes tons of money or he's just "available." This is supposed to be the rest of your life and it should be made up of mutual respect, fairness, understanding, support, open communication, love, and trust. If you have to question ANY of these things in your relationship, he or she for that matter, is not the right one.
Report Abuse
-
Posted by Iamhome Mon Oct 12, 2009 10:15am PDT
Yeppers! I will be 28 in two weeks and just within the last yr I've had that desire to marry. But I know it'll happen in God's perfect time, not mine. I am seeing this timeframe as an opportunity to get my life more order so that way when I meet that person I'll be more ready for him! It's ok if you're not married by a certain age, there's nothing that says you should be married by a specific age. That's just society!
Report Abuse
-
Posted by Silver Fox Mon Oct 12, 2009 10:19am PDT
I was married for the first time at 30 yrs old and divorced 9 months later. Don't look for love let it find you. And love, yes that can come with marrage it has to be earned and takes time. Get to know the person your going to spend the rest of your life with and hold back on the wedding bells. Love has no due date or expiration date, so live your life and enjoy it and you will soon come across that someone who is doing the same!
Silver Fox
Report Abuse
-
Posted by None Mon Oct 12, 2009 10:32am PDT
29!? Heck no, I think its more for my late 30's if I even marry, marriage now is either for money or just simple convenience of not wanting to feel lonely, I will only get married if A) I find my soul mate or B) Some rich old guy says he wants a trophy wife companion and leaves me all his money! YUP! LOL!!!
Report Abuse
-
Posted by __A_YAHOO_USER__ Mon Oct 12, 2009 10:32am PDT
Getting married was one of the worst mistakes of my life. It is though everyone (family & society) expects you to grow up get married and have a family. Sorry, but it is overrated and not for everyone.
Report Abuse
-
Posted by Ahleah G Mon Oct 12, 2009 10:35am PDT
I wanted to be married around 26. Instead went through a really bad breakup of a LTR that year. But it doesn't really stress me out. I am getting impatient to marry now though, only because I have found a really great guy and feel like we're compatible, have been together long enough, and are ready.
Report Abuse
-
Posted by Brett Pedersen Mon Oct 12, 2009 10:56am PDT
My marital advice is always that you should only get married if that's really, really what you want to do. If you have any doubts, don't do it, trust your instincts. Only marry if the thought of letting your prospective get away is just too much to bear.
Report Abuse
-
Posted by Mysterious Gryphon Mon Oct 12, 2009 11:02am PDT
I am getting married at 27, just a little earlier than I had expected. I met the love of my life at a slightly younger age than I had imagined I would, but sometimes that just happens and you have to embrace it.
I always thought I'd meet him around age 25, marry him around age 28, and have our first child at 30. Instead, I met him at 24, will get married at 27, and have decided that I don't want to have children at all!!!
Report Abuse
-
Posted by MonicaG Mon Oct 12, 2009 11:17am PDT
I'm getting married at 27 and I feel that is a good age. My fiance is will be 28. We are 25 and 26 now. I have had my single time, lived with girlfriends and went out and partied every weekend and it was great. But now my desires are different, I want to build a life and a home with someone and someday a family. Life is hard and having someone to go through it with makes it more of an adventure. I guess I am old-fashion, or brainwashed, because I do believe that people are supposed to get married and make babies, but people who make conscience decisions not to are very responsible and have even a better idea of marriage, since they know they do not want it despite what society says. BUUUUUT I want it, and will have it, in 2011!
Report Abuse
-
Posted by ash Mon Oct 12, 2009 11:18am PDT
At 36, I think mine past way back when....Still hope? Maybe.
Report Abuse
