He is a young "47" years old,..single,..well adjusted,..financially independent man, an..your just,..younger than him,..by 20 years...Is this "too many years", to look past the age of a man, as the man of your dreams??

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  Posted by SILENT KNIGHT Sat Oct 31, 2009 1:45pm PDT

  Some people appear wise beyond thier years, til time tells the truth no matter what the age. No one can hide from the truth for very long. Unevenly yoked is the bibles term for this. Alot can happen in a decade and time doesn't wait or rush for anyone. Staying on a natural course will get you where you need to be safer and without incident. Grown kids and Old children are not the same no matter how much they have in common because of the all the space in between the differences...and being responsible doesn't really make up for much, even though you would happily pay the cost for all damages. Offer more loving guidance to younger people than the advance course in sexual relations and mind games. A rooster is the barn yard pimp and an egg filled with alot of potential is still just an egg. Play rough with an egg for a long period of time and watch what happens.

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  Posted by Nadia Sat Oct 31, 2009 1:49pm PDT

  Wide age gaps in relationships, the percentage of it being successful in the end, are sadly slim. Not meaning that it can't happen. But more often than not, something is lacking. Relationships are hard enough when we find an outstanding partner, and we have our petty fights. What more so when there are things about the persons age, (or era) that begin to tick us off that we can't change.

  I was with a man only 15 years older than me. His daughter was as tall as me and people would be confused about who was the girlfriend. I had to convince myself that it was flattering i looked so young (yikes!). After a son, 15 months later I break it off. Out it all comes, "you were too young"..."you were too old". Those words are probably used more to inflict pain than having any truth.

  My experience has made me a pessimist. But I would never say never try and continue with it. If the fruit is sweet, take a bite. Like any relationship, some of us get a rotten core and some of us get a good feed.

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  Posted by master redfox Sat Oct 31, 2009 1:54pm PDT

  first of all you need to ask yourself what will you think of him 20 years from now when he is a young 67 and you are still 20 years younger than him? second you mentioned several times that he is financially secure i guess from this viewpoint you are figuring on not being a working woman but a stay at home person cooking cleaning hanging with the girls etc. You need to think of where you want to be and not what people think of you as a couple now.

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  Posted by urassismine2 Sat Oct 31, 2009 2:22pm PDT

  Man, you've got some stickum to that rhythm of wise counsel that you just laid on these folks, who peruse this subject, Micheal. Just because it smells good, doesn't mean it taste good, an I get it. Being unevenly yoked together, for some individuals, is a clear detriment, to the eye view and reality, for sure. Yes! However, across borders, in rural and citiscapes, some couples are making it happen, in fine fashion. They are rising above the noise of distraction, that comes from family, associates, and society. When we look at the 60/40 age group, the differentiation really isn't that much of a distorted view point. With the younger the couple, the more distortion there may be,the higher the failure rate, but that too has been overcome. The fact that the so-called normally opined marriage grouping, that we see surveyed, is running at a 65% divorce rate. People are looking in other directions to find thier specific life match, in a partner. Granted, the appearance of being wise in thier choice of an "older man", for some women can blow up, in short time, because of a number of issues. Loss of patience, being raised during different decades(as Micheal noted), health issues, food differences(pizza vs. real food), an the waning sexual question, a the majors. In this scenario, she would be 27 years of age. That would put her past the maturity age of 26 years, moving toward the "tick tock" age of her "baby fridge" of 30. Could he still have the babies that she wants? I think so..easily.. what do you think?

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  Posted by TasselLady Sat Oct 31, 2009 2:24pm PDT

  I guess it depends on the people involved. I've preferred dating men older than myself, because most of them are much more settled and emotionally mature. I've run into two older men who never left puberty, so I DID. The best thing I did was get away from them. I was lucky, I never had to worry about kids from another marriage unless they were much younger than I was. If he did have a kid around my age, then I would probably head for the hills. 90% of the time it causes alot of problems and hassle, and I don't need that!!! But, if I eventually meet a guy 20 years older who treats me like a queen and doesn't screw around behind my back, then it's fine with me. Better that than a younger guy who has the emotional maturity of a bale of hay. Great post! Nice to hear from you again!!!

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  Posted by Dianne Sat Oct 31, 2009 2:29pm PDT

  age may NOT matter in some instances but that much difference is too big a gap. what could you possibly have in common? every generation changes drastically and he would probably know nothing about what you are into same as you would be totally in the dark about things that happened in the 60's and 70's. he also is not many years away from retirement while you on the other hand would be hitting the prime of your life. age and time sure makes a difference in the way a person feels---will he feel like enjoying some of the things you will be doing in 20 years or will you have to go it alone because he just doesn't feel like being anywhere but in the recliner resting? are you sure you can love him enough to take care of an elderly person one day or will you just up and go and decide that it wasn't right for you after all? lots of things to consider because time stops for no one.

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  Posted by Dianne Sat Oct 31, 2009 2:29pm PDT

  age may NOT matter in some instances but that much difference is too big a gap. what could you possibly have in common? every generation changes drastically and he would probably know nothing about what you are into same as you would be totally in the dark about things that happened in the 60's and 70's. he also is not many years away from retirement while you on the other hand would be hitting the prime of your life. age and time sure makes a difference in the way a person feels---will he feel like enjoying some of the things you will be doing in 20 years or will you have to go it alone because he just doesn't feel like being anywhere but in the recliner resting? are you sure you can love him enough to take care of an elderly person one day or will you just up and go and decide that it wasn't right for you after all? lots of things to consider because time stops for no one.

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  Posted by urassismine2 Sat Oct 31, 2009 2:31pm PDT

  Nadia,..I can see the differences in the percentages, as you speak. There are alot of older men/younger women relationships thatend up in happy bliss. I think it takes the knowing acceptance of not just them, but the family. The tonality of interference can't be ignored. They are going to be part of the dynamic(a side point). Hurtful words from not having relationship success is the residue from any failed relationship. The hurtful words and phrases are just of a different subject matter, in my view. I was just in what she/he "wanted" to accept about the others inate subjectivity, or not. We are already different as human beings. The lateral move, to get past the decade question, or age issue is relative to the maturity of just those two, in my view...Thanks for being here...

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  Posted by urassismine2 Sat Oct 31, 2009 2:43pm PDT

  Ms. Redfox,.. The now an later part of the mix has to be evaluated, as you say. However, you are marrying the man, who lives inside of his body containment. The expectation, by his wife/partner, that his same youthfulness that you see today, is still going to be present in him, 20 years from now, should be a given. Yes, alzeimers is something to think about, but so is menopause. Our male character traits don't fall that far from our adolescent years that much. What a woman expects for her future is tied up in her acceptance to take on his age issue, long before that twenty years down the road ever comes into play...Thank you for kicking it with us..

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  Posted by VeeBee Sat Oct 31, 2009 2:52pm PDT

  This scenario seems typical to the older views of women succumbing to the submissive tendencies they have learned and men just wanting to feel younger and needed by dating a much younger woman. There may also be a financial benefit here for the woman and the man maybe living out some of his fantasies. Will this type of relationship work in the long run? Who knows. Perhaps if it is based upon solid tenements of a good relationship rather than superficial reasons it will. Time will tell...

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