Q: I made a huge mistake by cheating on my boyfriend. I swore to
him I'd never do it again and he has given me a second chance. How can
I regain his trust?
A:The first step toward repairing your relationship is understanding why
you strayed in the first place, so it doesn't happen again. Did you
feel unhappy, dissatisfied or neglected? By identifying the reasons for
your infidelity and addressing them with your boyfriend, you'll stand a
better chance of moving forward together. You also have to accept that
your partner is most likely feeling angry and hurt, which is natural.
You don't have to let him walk all over you, but listen to his gripes,
accept responsibility for what you've done and ask what you can do to
make him feel more secure, such as checking in with him when you're out
for the evening. Also, doing little things that mean a lot to him, like
buying tickets to see his favorite band, for instance, will help
restore his faith. Regaining his trust won't be easy or quick, but it is possible and your bond may end up stronger for it.
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From the Community…
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Posted by Fri May 9, 2008 8:30am PDT
Report AbuseFirst of all for what every reason you cheated cheating is wrong it only makes matters worse . But now you have another problum he is angery and hostile men are differnt we do not trust easy from the beginging and when we are decived we will shut down in a differnt way than a woman you may loose him but you will have to wate and see good luck
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Posted by Fri May 9, 2008 8:51am PDT
Report AbuseOnce a cheater, always a cheater - sorry, but he may never trust you again - prepare for the worst and hope for the best
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Posted by Fri May 9, 2008 9:13am PDT
Report Abuseit depends on the kind of dude he is... I advice you leave him and let him come find you if he still wants you. Every time you hop in the sack together, believe it or not he'll always remember... and it will affect everything for a long time.
Eventually he'll cheat on you and he won't feel half as remorseful becos afterall you did it first... You'll both always have that look over your shoulder feeling... so my advice is leave, let him come find you if he wants you.
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Posted by Fri May 9, 2008 9:24am PDT
Report AbuseMy husband and i have been together for 3 years now. How do you make him believe that you are not like the girls in his past that have cheated on him? Never have i cheated but he is so insecure because of his past that he always accuses me. How do I stop him from doing this before he ruins our marriage?
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Posted by Fri May 9, 2008 9:36am PDT
Report AbuseThe only way you will fully understand what you have done to him is to have him or someone else you truely care for cheat on you. When he feels angry, sad, or hurt, you won't be able to comprehend and will eventually get fed up and leave.
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Posted by Fri May 9, 2008 9:44am PDT
Report Abusesuck up to him alot. it will make him feel alot better! : )
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Posted by Fri May 9, 2008 9:44am PDT
Report AbuseI don't see how "buying tickets too see his favorite band" is going to help. Are you trying to honestly make amends or buy him off? You will never get the full trust back, so either live with that realization or start over again with someone else. And don't cheat again...........was it really worth it? Probably not.
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Posted by Fri May 9, 2008 9:49am PDT
Report AbuseBULL s--- IF SHE CHEATED ONCE SHE WILL DO IT AGAIN.IF I KNEW WHERE TO FIND HER I COULD PROVE IT.SHE BOUGHT SOMEBODY'S LINE OF STUFF AND FEEL RIGHT INTO THE SACK WITH HIM.AND LIKE I SAID I WOULD BET GOOD MONEY IT WILL BE EASIER FOR HER THE NEXT TIME.I THINK HE SHOULD DUMP HER AND NEVER LOOK BACK.TRUST ME SHE WILL BE DOING ONE OF HIS FRIENDS BEFORE THE DOOR STEPS GET COLD!!!!!!!
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Posted by Fri May 9, 2008 10:07am PDT
Report AbusejENNIFER WOOD 1976. I HAVE BEEN MARRIED 23 YEARS TO THE SAME MAN AND HAVE EXPERIENCED THE SAME THING . wE FOUGHT ALOT FOR LIKE THE FIRST TEN YEARS OR OUR MARRIAGE . iT WAS HELL ON EARTH . mY ADVISE TO YOU IS, IF YOU LOVE HIM STAY WITH HIM, IF YOU NEVER CHEAT ON HIM HE WILL ONLY TRUST YOU MORE AND MORE LITTLE BY LITLE .I KNOW, I WENT THROUGH HELL TRYING TO PROVE I WAS TRUSTWORTHY, HONEST WITH HIM, THAT I DIDN'T LOVE ANYONE ELSE THAT I WOULD NOT CHEAT ON HIM AND THE WHOLE NINE YARDS.AFTER 20+YEARS WER'E STILL TOGETHER . THE REASON I SAY YOU SHOULD REALLY MAKE SURE YOU LOVE HIM IS THAT AS THAT MANY YEARS PASS, MAYBE YOU'LL REALIZE YOU WASTED TIME THAT YOU COULD HAVE ENJOYED, YEARS LOST . IF YOUR'E CRAZEY IN LOVE,THE YEARS GO BY SO MUCH MORE QUICKLY. GOOD LUCK .
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Posted by Fri May 9, 2008 10:14am PDT
Report AbuseMen cheat all the time...I trust no man....like they say "for every man there's ten women"
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