I need married help

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  Posted by lalalala Sun Nov 8, 2009 12:37pm PST

  Well first of all, it's going to be hard to offer advice if someone doesn't know you or the specifics of your relationship and how it was before. But I'll give it a shot.

  First of all, are you all friends? Do you or did you at one point really talk to each other, enjoy hanging out together and not just because of the fringe benefits that relationships offer? If the answer to that is no, you do have a slight problem. The best thing that you can do in this situation is try to set up "date nights" where you go out and get to know each other, as people. My husband and I had a pretend first date where he took me out and we talked like it was our first time going out. It was totally hot...especially the part where I got to be a you-know-what and have hot, first-date...In any event, the other thing that you have to do for yourself is get a life. I don't mean to say that you don't have one or that it's wrong to want to spend time with your husband, but you should get friends, hobbies, take a class, whatever it takes to get you out of his sight in a legitimate way. When you put yourself in new situations you meet new people. Take them up on GROUP (this is not an excuse for an emotional affair) outings, and hang out with your own group of friends...make yourself SO busy that your husband has to schedule time with you. If he's relieved, then you have a real issue, but if not, he'll shape up quick.

  If you are friends and you have been before the relationship, none of this is necessary. Sit down and tell him how you truly feel. If he really loves you, he won't 'poo poo' your feelings and he'll make a real efforts to change.

  Good Luck :-)

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