I want sex more than he does!!! When new relationships are on the rocks before they are out-of-harbor.

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  Posted by Katelyn Mon Nov 9, 2009 2:28pm PST

  I have a problem. I'm in a new relationship with a guy who does not (or seems to not) to want to have sex. His previous relationship was long ago, his only one. I don't understand. I want sex to be part of the relationship, but not if it keeps him from emotionally loving me. The relationship is very new, so of course I can't share my feelings. Help!!!

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  Posted by Michelle Mon Nov 9, 2009 2:36pm PST

  Put sex on hold for a little while. If he doesn't come around dump him cause the relationship will not last.Maybe he is burnt out from his previous relationship and he can't find the words to say so.

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  Posted by Charity Mon Nov 9, 2009 4:07pm PST

  Depends on the culture, and the way in which a person generally relates to others. Sometimes it gets sticky when you have feelings or are growing feelings for someone, but are unsure about their feelings towards you. If he has a girlfriend than it'as not a situation you should over think unless he verbalizes his intrest. Guys send mixed messages too

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  Posted by Charity Mon Nov 9, 2009 4:10pm PST

  Believe it or not Some men arrent as sexually driven as some women are. Dont get it twisted if this is a problem you r having in the beginning of your relationship, it will always be a problem. I have been in the same situation and was very sexually frustrated

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  Posted by Maggie Mon Nov 9, 2009 4:55pm PST

  To be honest, I was just like you... and still pretty much am. I find myself initiating sex more often than my boyfriend. The key to it all is communication, I know it sounds cliche and obvious, but discuss why sex means a lot to you in the relationship and how you think it'll benefit you guys as a couple. Also, talking to him will probably answer most of your questions on why he doesn't want sex.

  It's rather frustrating, but things will work out if you guys are both open-minded and are in a committed, healthy relationship. Good luck!

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  Posted by Maggie Mon Nov 9, 2009 4:55pm PST

  To be honest, I was just like you... and still pretty much am. I find myself initiating sex more often than my boyfriend. The key to it all is communication, I know it sounds cliche and obvious, but discuss why sex means a lot to you in the relationship and how you think it'll benefit you guys as a couple. Also, talking to him will probably answer most of your questions on why he doesn't want sex.

  It's rather frustrating, but things will work out if you guys are both open-minded and are in a committed, healthy relationship. Good luck!

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  Posted by elaine Mon Nov 9, 2009 6:16pm PST

  FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE, I FIND MYSELF IN A NON SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP. I HAVE BEEN IN RELATIONSHIPS WHERE THE SEX STOPPED FOR A LACK OF INTEREST IN EACH OTHER OR THEY WERE DOOMED FROM THE START. GO FOR THE HAPPINESS THAT YOU AND YOUR MATE REQUIRE, IF HE IS NOT THE RIGHT ONE LIFE HAS A WAY OF CHANGING OUR CIRCUMSTANCES. ONE THING THAT IS CONSTANT, IS WE ARE ALWAYS CHANGING AND SO ARE THE WANTS AND NEEDS WE HAVE. ONE IMPORTANT THING IS THAT YOU WILL LEARN SOMETHING NEW ABOUT YOURSELF AND ABOUT THE OTHER PERSON AND IT CAN ASSIST IN GUIDING YOU IN THE FUTURE WITH OR WITHOUT THIS GUY. TAKE YOUR TIME!

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  Posted by CrazyDoug Mon Nov 9, 2009 7:15pm PST

  It's possible your guy really likes you, and is nervous that he will "underperform" bedroom wise. I disagree with the whole mentality of the previous commenters that love is completely separate from sex, I think sex is, in a meaningful relationship, a facet of love. It's just as important as openness, respect and communication. The most important thing to get across is that you really like him and want to have a meaningful relationship with him, and that means leaving sexual hangups at the door. He may be afraid to initiate intimacy because his previous girlfriend belittled him, or he could be a virgin and afraid he won't know what he's doing. Either way, let him know that you won't judge him for his performance, and any hangups he has you two can work on together. Also, encourage him to masturbate regularly. It raises the level of testerone and improves the libido of both men and women.

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  Posted by CrazyDoug Mon Nov 9, 2009 7:16pm PST

  *testosterone

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  Posted by Eddie Mon Nov 9, 2009 7:58pm PST

  Have u ever thought that u might be an intimidating woman when it boils down to it or he might be afraid of his performance in the bed. Hopefully he isn't on the downlow if you know what I mean.

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