Is a phone relationship cheating?

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  Posted by casy Sat Aug 16, 2008 8:01am PDT

  Once a cheater, a liar always one. He is NOT to be trusted...Kick the liar to the streets............

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  Posted by Sean Sat Aug 16, 2008 8:01am PDT

  I'd say give him one more chance. It sounds like he is making a serious effort, (changing his cell number, deleting women's numbers, giving you access to his phone records). But you should make it absolutely clear to him that any more contact at all means it's over. If he is serious and he loves you it will be over. Your comment about his lack of repect for marriage is very insightful and important as well. If he doesn't respect someone else's marriage he certainly might not respect yours in the future. Hope things work out for you!

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  Posted by stop Sat Aug 16, 2008 8:02am PDT

  Crazy story that is --------Yooooooooo.LOL

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  Posted by CarolM Sat Aug 16, 2008 8:05am PDT

  Well, in my opinion, things will never change. Especially since now he might think not doing his "normal routine" is okay (bars, out with the guys and etc..) because eventually, this will take a toll on him and things will go back to the same way they were whether its with the same woman or a different one. I divorced my husband for the same reasons. And I also had 2 children and he was doing the phone call thing and it lead into a relationship that was too close for comfort. Now he is re-married to this same woman and does it to her. You have to either accept them for these faults or move on because nobody ever changes!! Talking to someone who is the opposite sex might start out as a friendship, but it ALWAYS ends up to being more. Especially when they start talking about their personal life. Sorry!! Be smart!! There are plenty of fish in the sea. And if you think he's a catch, their will always be someone better. You just have to find that right person. Good Luck and do the right thing for your sanity and health!!

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  Posted by hannah Sat Aug 16, 2008 8:08am PDT

  I would consider that cheating because your boyfriend kept it from you, so he obviously knew it was wrong. He had feelings with this woman or he would not have talked to her 8 or 9 times a day. He probably talked to her on the phone longer than he talked to you in person. Sounds to me like you deserve better.

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  Posted by VirtuousPrincess Sat Aug 16, 2008 8:22am PDT

  How many more red flags do you need? He was sleeping with some elses 'wife'. Enough said!

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  Posted by lost-n-lust Sat Aug 16, 2008 8:28am PDT

  He’s been plug’n her & I think you really know this…

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  Posted by springtime Sat Aug 16, 2008 8:34am PDT

  Something just isn't right here. No one talks 8 times a day just about everyday, normal things. Of course, he had feelings for her or this wouldn't have gone on for a year. Really, he can change his cell number every month, but they still know how to find one another. You are correct about trust. It's part of the foundation for a healthy relationship. If you have to constantly be checking up on someone , then trust is missing in action.

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  Posted by shirley g Thu Sep 25, 2008 7:50pm PDT

  Cheating seems to be a major problem in relationships. The way I

  eliminated it from my life is to NOT get into an exclusive relation-

  ship.

  By staying single, I am freeing myself from that headache, & making

  it possible to take advantage of any encounters that pop up without

  having to deal with the cheating issue.

  I went through it big time with my marriage & a romantic relation-

  ship after my divorce. It couldn't be proven but the suspicion was

  there.

  Phone conversations that lead to meetings ARE signs of cheating, as

  are LONG store trips to pick up a few items, unexplained absences, &

  just basic aloofness on their part. That alone shows that their mind

  is preoccupied by something/someone other than you.

  As Springtime says, "If you have to be constantly checking up on some

  one, trust is missing in action." I found myself doing that, & it's

  no way to live.

  As for the romantic encounters that pop up, I make sure to find out

  their status before I consider it. It goes both ways.

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