Love + Sex

Monday, November 30, 2009

No Rhyme or Reason to Cheaters


Carrie - Before He Cheats by Hmr_withlovesh.

Carrie - Before He Cheats by Hmr_withlovesh.

There is always a lot of buzz on the Internet about cheaters and why they stray.  Articles dissect all the possible reasons people cheat. They even going as far as giving advice on how to stop it before it happens.

After reading about the 15th story on cheaters I can't help but shake my head at how silly they are. I understand that when someone cheats you are compelled to find a reason or answers to your questions. I’ve been there done that and its heart wrenching. However, it is how I have come to the conclusion that sometimes in life there aren’t always answers, or we are just never going to get them.

Some of the reasons given that people cheat may be applicable to a few, but mostly they are not going to fit the bill. I truly believe that most people do not really need, nor do they have, a reason for why they cheat. It is not always so complicated as we try to make it out to be.

Once a cheater always a cheater is a an old adage that rings true. I believe for the most part people who cheat are repeat offenders and they do not have any complex reasons why. They just do it for the hell of it, kind of like when you’re in line at the grocery store and throw a pack of gum on the conveyor belt.You don’t have any complex reasoning for doing so, you just felt like it at the time and it was right there. It was an impulse buy. To cheaters it's just an impulse buy and that’s it. There are no” Daddy issues”, No ” I felt lonely”, No “I wasn’t getting enough attention”, No ” I was really drunk” because the ” reasons” for cheating really are just excuses. Bad excuses.

Do you agree?

Syndication:

From the Community…

Comments 1-5 of 5
  • ms.cece's Avatar
    Posted by ms.cece Fri Jul 3, 2009 8:39pm PDT

    yes,I agree with you wholeheartedly. My last child's father actually tried to excuse his infidelity as "I wasn't sexing her I was taping that" to which I replied it is still sexual intercourse.Every excuse he had coming out of his mouth just made me more angry because it was a load of s--t! If the shoe was on the other foot he wouldn't forgive me as easily. I have since lost interest in relationships since now that I am out in the dating world again I find that guys don't want a relationship it's all about the one night stand or they don't even want to talk anymore. Besides the only person you can truly trust is yourself.

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  • JoKTM's Avatar
    Posted by JoKTM Sat Jul 4, 2009 11:23pm PDT

    People cheat because they want to because if they didn't want to they wouldn't. Men and women both try to give excuses but they are just copouts. Somehow they got interested in the idea of cheating though they could get away with it and deal with the guilt. They never think what it will do to there loved ones because they are selfish.

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  • Dede's Avatar
    Posted by Dede Sun Jul 5, 2009 9:44am PDT

    I agree and disagree....Agree: I think people who cheat are stupid, they are not using their brains to think that sleeping with someone will solve the answer to their problems..if you have a issue with your mate talk about it duh!!! Disagree: Usually when partners arent sleeping together (sexually)or communcating something bad is bound to happen what do you expect. I know alot of girlfriends of mines that had a boyfriend or two cheat on them and when I ask them well wat really cause him to get to that point to jepordize his relationship for quick fix its because she was always too busy or too tired or not in the mood well what the f*%$ did u expect, if you wont give to him who else is suppose to give it to him...why dont put yourself in his shoes, if you had a man and he wasnt give you none or not showing you any attention, ignoring you all the time, too busy or not in the mood ....your human and his definetley a horny human so stop making it seem like cheaters are evil-aliens from another planet.....to get an effect you have to have a cause. Good luck!!!P.S I was just giving my opinion I've neva cheated or been cheated on but I've been the shoulder to cry on so I've seen and heard it all!LOL

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  • Mitchell's Avatar
    Posted by Mitchell Thu Jul 9, 2009 5:11am PDT

    well let me tell u something im a guy who is 20 years old and ive only been with this 1 girl.....and at first her sex drive was higher than mine and i loved it but then it dropped significantly....and my sex drive has always been high to the point where if i could have it 4 times a day i would now i get it 1 times a day some days we dont even have sex and i end up mastebating in the shower to get that urge outta me and i tell her i would like to start having sex more and she gets mad saying " well if i dont satisfy u find someone who will" but she says this cuz shes mad but she wouldnt want me to cheat on her but i feel like as if she takin me for a joke....so f--- it IM GONNA CHEAT!!! and it not cuz i dont love her cuz i do but she refuses to satisfy me

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  • Windmajik's Avatar
    Posted by Windmajik Mon Aug 17, 2009 1:54pm PDT

    I don't totally agree with the article. I cheated on my husband with the man who is my current husband. I have been with my current husband for 17 years today and have never once cheated on him. The difference...I was 18 when I got married the first time. However, there is the old saying that if you marry a man who cheated on his wife then you'll be married to a man that cheats on his wife. Unfortunately, this was true and last year I found out that my husband, while being with me had been involved in a relationship with another woman the entire time we were together. So, in some ways I agree with the article and some ways I don't. Having been both a cheater and the one cheated on I can say that many times it depends on the circumstances.

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