Love + Sex

Monday, December 7, 2009

Reader's Dilemma: "My man and I are planning a sex marathon, so I need some new tricks!"

12-sex-kiss_sm.jpg
Some brave readers have shared their dating dilemmas, including "What if you don't like your friend's boyfriend?" and "My boyfriend never says, 'I love you.'"

Today, a reader is looking for ways to spice up her sex life....

Our reader's question...

"I have a long-distance friend-with-benefits, who is more than ten years my senior. We are planning a marathon sex weekend very soon. He has done just about everything sexually, but I want to try something he has never done before. I'm more conservative and don't want to venture out too far from my comfort zone. I'll try just about anything, except group, which he has done several times. Toys aren't really his thing. Any suggestions?"

My answer...

Thanks for your question! While it's great that you are open to trying new things, I'm so glad you're sticking with things you're comfortable with. Also, keep in mind, he may have done lots of sexual experimentation, but he hasn't done these things with you, so he will be excited to try them again with you.

Here are three ways to spice things up....

* Put a mirror next to the bed. It sounds simple, but it can be incredibly sexy to peek at yourselves as you roll around naked.

* Hold back. If he's very experienced sexually, it might be exciting for him to hold back a little. Play a game where you make strict rules: He has to sit in a chair and can't touch you for five minutes. You can kiss him and touch him and take off your clothes and do anything you want! But he has to stay still. (It's similar to this kissing game.) It's the same theory as playing hard to get: Holding back can make you want it that much more!

* Role play with a twist. You each get five scraps of paper, and you have to write down roles for the other person. So you could write down: Professor, high-school quarterback, UPS delivery guy, etc...And he could write down: Cheerleader, sexy boss, flight attendant, hot neighbor, etc....Then you mix up the scraps of paper and pick one from each pile. You have to act out whatever you choose.

And don't forget to try our 101 Ways to Have the Best Sex of Your Life!

Readers, do you like to experiment, or would you rather keep things traditional and sweet? Do you have any spicy tips for your fellow reader? I'd love to hear! xoxo

Photo: Emilie Bjork

MORE FROM SMITTEN:


Syndication:

From the Community…

Comments 1-8 of 8
  • __A_YAHOO_USER__'s Avatar
    Posted by __A_YAHOO_USER__ Fri Dec 12, 2008 10:03am PST

    From a guys point of view it's not about smoke and mirrors, role play or kissing games. Although those are great ways to raise the bar if you know what I mean but guys like sex, naughty sex. If this guy has had group sex or multiple partners at once and you don't want to do the same don't even think about it, do what you enjoy and ask him what he likes it's what counts. Guys especially if they care for you want to get you off! and as many times as he can (ok maybe that's me). He wants sexy cloth, dirty talk, touching, foreplay, oral, intercourse in many ways from doggie style to cowgirl but he should want to please you and of course he'll get off. Hot wet sex will top any smoke and mirrors.

    Report Abuse
  • VERNELLG's Avatar
    Posted by VERNELLG Fri Dec 12, 2008 5:31pm PST

    All I can say is "WOW" you really know what's going on in the real world where not many people live. Very well written. I have all ten reasons to cheat just can not find the time.

    Report Abuse
  • edna's Avatar
    Posted by edna Sat Dec 13, 2008 2:19am PST

    it,s my first time to navigate this website but i think it's really helpful for other peopole and really beneficiary with our own sake...thanks for the advisers...good luck and more power...

    Report Abuse
  • JakeF's Avatar
    Posted by JakeF Sat Dec 13, 2008 8:56am PST

    Try fecal-fetish, fart and sh-t in his face. You did say you'll try just about anything.

    Report Abuse
  • Mystica's Avatar
    Posted by Mystica Mon Dec 15, 2008 7:49am PST

    Ok so this guy has done all the kink soooo try this.....get scented candles...rose pedals spread on the bed...a silk scarf for touching...scented massage oils...and study a sentual massage book so you know what to do and by candle light give him the massage of his life starting with the head to toes to front and finish it off with letting him go wild...Get as manny massage toys as you can from flat rocks heated to warm to satin scarves to ice cubes and go also make sure to have a romantic snack for after like fruits and wine.

    Report Abuse
  • whtknght's Avatar
    Posted by whtknght Mon Dec 15, 2008 9:05am PST

    what was the question??????????

    Report Abuse
  • 's Avatar
    Posted by Fri Jan 2, 2009 11:33am PST

    A sex marathon is a bad idea. Men naturally like the thrill of the hunt. Some admit that and some don't but they all like the thrill of the hunt. If you give him everything he's ever imagined sexually, guaranteed he'll be bored afterwards and will seek something new once you're both done because he's recieved everything he wanted from you.

    Report Abuse
  • theluckyone's Avatar
    Posted by theluckyone Tue Jan 6, 2009 1:24pm PST

    Okay, honestly I think you should use wip cream and chocolate and also mirrors because we man love to see ourself having sex in the mirror because it looks a lot better. I had few of those and believe me, when u have something like that is something you will never forget because those for man are some really good memories. the more fun you make the better it will be and he wont forget, try to do it everywhere from her room to the living room and the parents room lol and finish it off in the shower. for me it was like 14 times in a day and a half, but a sex drive is the best for man aside of the three sum.

    Report Abuse
Comments 1-8 of 8

leave your comment

You must sign in to post a comment

Sign In for personalized information

New User? Sign Up

Updates Chatter on Shine…

Love Byte

Skip the multiple-choice quiz, and read up on if you're a mom, a nag, too clingy, or perfect in every way. Aren't we all?