Love + Sex
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Sex tips, from the year 1894
editor
Imagine a time when sex was
seen as "at best revolting and at worst rather painful."
According to
The
Sun (and well, anyone who's ever taken rudimentary
history lessons), the Victorians, not exactly known for their
raunchy bedroom antics, perceived a woman's um, "wifely
duties" as something to abhor.
Sex Tips for Husbands and
Wives was penned by Ruth Smythers, a vicar's wife, in
1894. Some amazing gems:
- The wise bride will permit a maximum of two brief sexual
experiences weekly — and as time goes by she should make every
effort to reduce this frequency.
- A selfish and sensual husband can easily take advantage of his
wife. One cardinal rule of marriage should never be forgotten: Give
little, give seldom and above all give grudgingly. Otherwise what
could have been a proper marriage could become an orgy of sexual
lust.
- A wise wife will make it her goal never to allow her husband to
see her unclothed body, and never allow him to display his
unclothed body to her.
- Once in bed, the wife should turn off all the lights and make
no sound to guide her husband in her direction, lest he take this
as a sign of encouragement.
- When he finds her, she should lie as still as possible. Bodily
motion could be interpreted as sexual excitement by the optimistic
husband. Sex, when it cannot be prevented, should be practised only
in total darkness.
- Clever wives are ever on the alert for new and better methods
of denying and discouraging the amorous overtures of the husband.
Arguments, nagging, scolding and bickering prove very effective if
used in the late evening about an hour before the husband would
normally commence his seduction.
- By their tenth anniversary many wives have managed to complete
their child-bearing and have achieved the ultimate goal of
terminating all sexual contacts with the husband.
Compare that to the lessons offered by Holly Hollenbeck, author of
the 2008 book,
Sex Lives of Wives:
- Exude tremendous enthusiasm for sex and have it as often as
possible. Try never to say no and do not start thinking or talking
about other chores or problems during it.
- Create variety — make love as a “lady” then next time, play it
nasty as a “tramp”. Alternate the pace — sometimes fast and
frantic, sometimes slow and romantic, using different sound
effects, including sexy compliments breathlessly uttered,
pleasurable moans and sighs and nasty encouragements.
- Be assertive about what you want, taking care that any ideas do
not come across as criticism. Try incorporating what you would like
him to do by working the suggestions into the details of a story.
Describe how hot such action would make you or your character in
the story feel.
- Tune in to what he loves and share it with him — if he likes
watching sexy movies, suggest watching one together. Visit a
bookshop and choose some erotic stories you can read to each other,
surf the web with him and share “chats”.
- Venture outside the bedroom and seek unusual locations for sex.
Have a mental fixation on the sensation — focus only on his and
your pleasure.
- Know what turns you on — your desire will heighten his. Good
things for women to try include having an ear sucked, a foot rub,
leaning on a vibrating washing machine during the spin cycle and
feeling the spray of a pulsating showerhead.
Damn, looks like you really have come a long way baby.
Related: victorian sex, sex tips, sex advice, self-help
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Posted by rachiebaby24 Tue Nov 11, 2008 9:49pm PST
Um, not to be a downer - but mont.calm posting above is right. this is just for laughs. Seriously - look it up. This is an amusing piece, but totally fake.
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Posted by sharif Tue Nov 11, 2008 10:18pm PST
I really did not enjoy sex completely.
Now what can i do?please give me some information.
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Posted by Dottie Tue Nov 11, 2008 10:39pm PST
I am now 47 years old and up to my 40's I found that most men do not even know how to pleasure a woman. Woman know what men want, but most of the men get done and roll over and sleep- lovemaking is such a great thing if you just take the time. An at the age I am at I am still looking for one that can keep up!!!!!
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Posted by thomas t Tue Nov 11, 2008 11:34pm PST
wow, i should really go and buy that second book asap!
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Posted by risha Tue Nov 11, 2008 11:41pm PST
honestly im in love to another guy its bestfriend ever since but u know wer both complicated relation but for me and i its not a big deal about sex cause its a part of relation to love making
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Posted by live Wed Nov 12, 2008 2:41am PST
hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
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Posted by Hunter Wed Nov 12, 2008 3:04am PST
if you dont give him good loving at home, amy is right around the corner waitin for the next married man......... kansas wives, beware
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Posted by TeMorrow Wed Nov 12, 2008 3:20am PST
It's concerning to me that both of these offer suggestions about how to act or behave. It leaves women disconnected from their own healthy libidos as they are going to be too worried about if they are "doing it right". Techniques are fine, how to touch him, etc..., but as far as how to act or behave I feel women should be encouraged to learn how to feel sexy for themselves, to pamper and take excellent care of themselves without worrying about their enthusiasm level or if they are "acting" appropriate or not. I did like the suggestion about knowing what you like and then sharing that/asking for that, but some of these were a little concerning.
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Posted by Jassodra Wed Nov 12, 2008 3:38am PST
sex is the best thing a woman could enjoy in life. I like it big big and hard. full force from the bac doggy style. I want it every night. Variety is the spice of life. Great sex good life.
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Posted by Jassodra Wed Nov 12, 2008 3:38am PST
sex is the best thing a woman could enjoy in life. I like it big big and hard. full force from the bac doggy style. I want it every night. Variety is the spice of life. Great sex good life.
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