Love + Sex
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Sexual History: Why Your Number Doesn't Matter
user
Every guy, specifically
every comedian, knows that a woman's number is a whole lot of
hooey. You say ten; he realizes you meant seventeen. And it's
not that you're lying about "seven," it's just
dudes consider any "crossing the threshold" to be sex.
And, per our buds over at
The Frisky, gals have some sexual encounters that just
don't count.
While the whole "number" issue's been batted about
more times than anyone could care to recount (Lisa and Marge
Simpson once decided Lisa could wear white to her wedding
because Milhouse "doesn't count"), the fact is the
lion's share of guys don't count. But guys do care about
sexual
history for at least 5 reasons.
- Disease: Guy's without junk funk would
prefer to keep it that way. While he doesn't want to ask,
he's keenly interested in not catching anything that will make
him itch, cause pee-related burning, disfigure his mouth, genitalia
or anus, give him the cancer or compromise his immune system. If
you're clean, he's cool.
- Famous people: There's a good chance he
won't be jealous that you screwed the lead singer of Arctic
Monkeys, but he will wonder if he's really a cool guy, if
you're still in touch and if he'd come to his birthday
party.
- Crazy stuff: In an effort to find out what
gets you going, eventually he'll want to know the crazy things
that you've done in the sack (or a baby pool full of KY). This
will also galvanize him to ask if you'd do something he finds
to be of risqué, kinky interest (hello threesome).
- People he knows: Sure it's childish, but a
guy doesn't like to be blindsided with "yeah, dude, I hit
that." The idea of hearing "Hell, Lumbergh f*cked
her," from a third-party is ten times worse than knowing you
slept with eleven guys during a particularly low self-esteem-y
junior year in college.
- Money: Did money ever exchange
hands? Not to be too-too judgmental but
gold diggers are scary. Plus the hip-hop music has made us
leery of trying to convert a ho into a housewife*.
Just like age is just a number, so is number of partners. What
(and who) you did with that number counts. Oh, and just for the
record, having sex with a virgin
is not that exciting (unless you're in love or some such).
*Note: Mostly kidding on this one.
More From YourTango:
Written by Tom Miller
for Tomfoolery.
Related: yourtango.com, single, sexual history, sex, relationships, married, love
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Posted by None Tue Jul 14, 2009 9:52am PDT
Number does matter, sleeping with people you don't even know who they are and can't even count anymore, is a glutton, and shows lack of self-respect and self-control as an individual, man or woman.
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Posted by February Tue Jul 14, 2009 10:13am PDT
I can gratefully say that I have done none of the above named with any guy. Any guy I've slept with or made out with is clean. I can honestly say that I havent slept with that many guys cuz I do have limitations. They have to be my boyfriend for a certain amount of time before they can hop in the bed with me.
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Posted by JoKTM Tue Jul 14, 2009 10:40am PDT
My husband was sexualy active way before me and he was my first and only. We were 25 and 26 when we got together so I knew his number had to be atleast 10. We did not discuss how many partners he had, all I needed to no was he was disease free. You should ask because numbers dont mean anything. A person can get an STD from their first partner so the numbers game is stupid.
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Posted by cutebanker Tue Jul 14, 2009 11:20am PDT
i assume all people have a history- and i don't need to know about it unless it is purposely going to affect me
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Posted by Beth Tue Jul 14, 2009 11:32am PDT
I think quality... not quantity, is what we should account for.
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Posted by J.J. Tue Jul 14, 2009 2:13pm PDT
Love is a good thing. Everyone has a soul mate. Keep on lovin everybody!!
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Posted by Daisy Tue Jul 14, 2009 4:35pm PDT
A woman wrote this.
Enough said.
Your number DOES count to a guy. The double standard exists, and always will exist.
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Posted by Doktor Eevol Tue Jul 14, 2009 5:29pm PDT
Please, why is this numbers a woman only issue? Plus, women aren't the only gender that gold digs their partners.
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Posted by tomw Tue Jul 14, 2009 6:15pm PDT
I have only had one woman that I had made love to, that I have really felt I had a connection with and the rest of the women were just sex. I would trade any an all the women I had sex with just to have that one woman I made love to back again.If it is good, work out whatever you need to work out to keep it.
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