Opinions on such gatherings are hotly contested. Anti-partiers question the readiness and maturity of a fiance(e) wanting a "last taste of freedom." Pro-partiers question the naysayer's trust in the relationship. And then there is a whole gray area where a couple must determine how much is too much and what actions are inexcusable. Read: Why I Hated His Strip-Club Bachelor Party
So why can't a group of friends simply gather to celebrate a friend's transition into a new life—without binge drinking, strippers and penis balloons? After all, the tradition's origins are actually quite conservative.
According to a recent Divine Caroline article, bachelor parties are thought to date back as far as the 5th century BC in Sparta, when soldiers would host a dinner in honor of a comrade's wedding. Now before images of 300-esque men in loincloth-clad revelry roll through your mind, the event was actually a very low-key affair.
It wasn't until the Victorian age that bachelor parties even became associated with the "get it while you still can" mentality. (Funny how much that stuffy era has contributed to marriage customs.) In those times, men wanted a night to bid farewell to friends the wife may not approve of once the vows were said. Thus the seeds were sown that eventually would grow into the modern day festivity of engaging in "last chance" acts. Poll: Do You Care If His Best Friend Is A Woman?
Bachelorette parties, on the other hand, didn't come into the public sphere until the 1960s when the women's rights movement was knocking down the door of every male-only tradition. The parties first began as a scandalous upgrade to the bridal shower, in which female friends would give the bride "embarrassing" gifts such as lingerie. Then in the '80s and '90s, it escalated to rival the men's version thanks to the addition of male strippers and glow-in-the-dark penis necklaces. Watch: Bachelorette Party Dos and Don'ts
So whether you and your significant other are opting for separate his and her parties or wish to combine everything into one big bash, there really isn't a wrong way to do a bachelor(ette) party as long as both sides are comfortable with what has been decided. As much as the custom has evolved (or devolved depending on how you look at it), the key ingredient has always been the same: camaraderie.
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- Why I Hated His Strip-Club Bachelor Party
- Do Bachelor Parties Make Men Do Bad Things?
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Written by Julie Leung for YourTango.com.
