Love + Sex

I have been with my boyfriend for over a year. We have had our ups and downs, but for the most part we seem to have a good relationship. I have been texting a guy that I thought was a great guy and someone that had a lot of great qualities. We were texting back and forth for about 10 months and the thought of hooking up with him was always in the back of my head. I would always make excuses not to meet him, because I love my boyfriend, but I also felt that I was missing out on meeting him. So one day I got upset with my boyfriend and when I got to work that morning I emailed him and told him that we needed to break up and that I had not been happy with him for a while. My boyfriend was crushed and I could feel how upset he was when I was reading his emails. As I was reading his responces, I felt really bad cause he was hurt and I almost wanted to cry. After a few hours I was no longer mad. I went home that day and felt the need to be the most sweetest girlfriend to my boyfriend. He assured me how much he loves me and how he would do anything to keep me happy. That weekend I went to a wedding that was about 5 minutes away from the text guy. He kept on insisting for me to meet up with him. I told him that I had a B-day party to go to right after the wedding and he said just to stop by his house and say hi. I was with one of my closes friends so I figure what the heck... I went to his house and he told me just to come in and that he was in his room upstairs. My friend stayed downstairs in the living room and I went to his room. He was watching t.v and he wanted me to lay down with him for a minute. While I was laying down with him in his arms I felt bad. All I could think about was how much I love my boyfriend. He kissed me and I just didn't feel like kissing him back. He is a really attractive men and a sweet person. He got ontop of me and I knew he wanted to have sex with me. If I would of been single I know that I would of been turned on, but I am not single and I did not want to have sex with him. He got off me and we started talking. He asked me to be his girlfriend and give him a chance. He told me how he has been trying to have a relationship with me and that he wanted us to be together. I told him that I didn't know him well enough to consider a relationship at this moment. The funny thing is that all the time that I had been talking and texting him I always thought that he was the perfect guy to have a relationship with. Point being, after that day I haven't answer his calls or replay to his texts. He finally told me that he would stop bugging me and I have no regrets losing him. The reason that I could not cheat was, because I could not hurt my boyfriend because it would hurt me too. Knowing how much my boyfriend loves me and how good his been to me takes away the desire to have someone else on the side. I think that if my boyfriend and I wouldn't have had that argument that lead to me knowing how much my boyfriend cares, I provably would of cheated and even take his offer to be his girlfriend. I guess all a women really needs is reasurance to how committed our partner really is. When two people get too comfortable they often let the relationship go down the drain. It is better to try to work things out first before giving up something that could be the right future for you. If my boyfriend wouldn't have spilled his heart out to me, I would of cheated and most likely ended our relationship. Now I am happy with him and I know that I would never cheat on him.