On Saturday, I was the first to arrive at Mariel’s birthday. Lucky me, I got to sample all the food first in order to make sure it was safe for the other guests.
Here are my tips for showing up alone and working it solo:
Find anyone you might know. Look for the host or someone
you recognize. If it’s a work-related event, introduce yourself to
the publicist or planner throwing it.
Head to the bar. This one is especially obvious. If you’re a quiet person, order a loud drink with an umbrella and use it as a conversation piece. If that’s embarrassing, how about a Kir Royale? People will say, “That looks yummy.”
See our tips: Real Women Tell Their Orgasm Secrets!
Use a crutch. Make a trip to the bathroom or, without isolating yourself, check your cell or BlackBerry. But do this only once. Otherwise, people will tell you to go home and use the internet there.
Put on your “la-di-da face.” Sometimes I stand or sit somewhere by myself and take it all in. You can separate from the crowd and not feel self-conscious if you look preoccupied. Don’t check your watch, but make a face like you’re thinking, I hope Sally didn’t get stuck trying on 7 outfits. Often I channel my inner anthropologist: I need to study these strange people before I attempt to mix with them. Or I simply people-watch. Just don’t look judgy, or that hot guy watching you will be afraid to pounce.
Chat up a stranger. First I try to find a guy who is good-looking (why waste time, right?). Next, I go for someone friendly-looking. When I’ve zeroed in on my target, I make eye contact. The easiest solo approach happens at the food table. I’ll say something in my familiar-silly-flirty-happy way, like, “Who made these brownies? I might develop an addiction.” Sometimes I go with, “This wine is fabulous—you must try it!” Then there’s always, “How do you know the birthday girl?” For me, the fastest way to get even a shy girl talking is to either ask her how she met her boyfriend or identify which reality TV shows we watch in common and then start gossiping. Guys, on the other hand, like to explain their specific skill sets or random knowledge. Interview them about BBQ-ing techniques or the game on TV. (For great conversation skills, try this book.)
Check out the 10 things he’s thinking when he sees your bra!
And lest you decide you’d rather not go to the party at all…
Give yourself a pep talk. I remind myself it’s an opportunity to eat better than I normally do. Plus, you never know what will be in the punch, who will be on the dance floor, or what will be in the gift bag!
Finally, if I’m still not having a good time, it’s usually because I’m not trying. I really like people—they amuse me greatly—so if I can’t find anyone interesting, I’m just not in the mood. What then? Head to the next party—or go home and read a good book.
What’s your M.O. at a party? What’s your favorite icebreaker, appetizer, or type of party? I like BBQs and birthdays. I’d love to throw a dinner party someday with my future husband who can cook.
Related: 101 Ways to Have the Best Sex of Your Life
MORE FROM SINGLE-ISH:
- 5 Secrets All Guys Keep From You
- 10 Things He’s Thinking Before He Cheats
- How Much Do You Tell A New Lover About Your Old Lovers?
- Subscribe to Glamour right now and get an exclusive tote bag free!
