Top ten reasons to say no to friends with benefits

From the Community…

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  Posted by another hockey fan Thu Jul 2, 2009 1:04pm PDT

  To each his own. A lot of this depends upon the ages of the friends too. For me:

  2. Well, there's only one rule. If you are going to sleep with another person you SHOULD be honest and tell your friend first or ASAP. That way they can decide whether or not they want to continue sleeping with you.

  3. Disagree. I think this makes it easier to date someone else because you aren't thinking about having sex with them right away if you are being taken care of elsewhere. Obviously, once you decide to sleep with that person, you end it with your friends with benny's.

  6. Not true at all. I had a couple of very good friends that cared a lot about, just knew they weren't guys I would marry.

  7. I'm unclear how this is deemed as "using" people if both parties are fine with the arrangement.

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  Posted by Cheryl L. Fri Jul 3, 2009 11:15am PDT

  I'm in my 40's and have been in a relationship. But back in my 20's I had my Friends with Benefits buddy. There was no name for it, but that's what he was. We talked, hungout with mutual friends, and was even able to date other people. Neither one of us would get jeleous who we dated or hooked up with other guys. Because we both knew that even though we had a great respectful adult friendship, neither was looking for anything more. Yet when we were interested in sowing so wild oats, we knew there was someone there we could turn to.

  Friends with Benefits rule #1. Both need to be looking for nothing more than sex. And both need to respect the others freedoms to pursue other buddies or relationships.

  If you have a Friends with Benefits, who wants more, you need to end it, it's just not far.

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• 
  Posted by Leah Fri Jul 3, 2009 1:47pm PDT

  im sure im not getting in to it,lets just say yes there a boundaries and agrement but women are emotional.sex is something we do with emotions.which makes us wanting more out of the person, so why wud u waste your time just being a victim of your own trap.i think its more better to put more effort finding a much deeper relationship,cos its not worth it.

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  Posted by M Fri Jul 3, 2009 11:20pm PDT

  Unfortunately, I've been there and done that... it hurts. It hurts a lot when you lose both. This "friends with benefits" doesn't work!!

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  Posted by Terrie Sat Jul 4, 2009 1:59am PDT

  Friends with benefits does work. As long as that is all it is. Dont put yourself there if u have strong feelings for that person.

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  Posted by TJ S Sat Jul 4, 2009 1:03pm PDT

  The problem comes in when one of the two parties goes into it with more in mind. I've had friends with benefits and it can work. But if one person starts to get feelings that are more serious, then it needs to be discussed and either move forward or dissolve it.

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  Posted by Dede Sun Jul 5, 2009 9:52am PDT

  Friends with benefits is kinda arkward especially when end up getting into a real serious relationship with their friend and will probably be married by the end of the year...lol!

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  Posted by Karla Wed Jul 8, 2009 1:47pm PDT

  friends wit benefits are kool but....wen i got into a relationship it was hard to stay away from my "friend" he knew wat to do to get me....ohh well it was fun..lol

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• 
  Posted by Kelsey Wed Jul 15, 2009 8:53am PDT

  I have been in this boat and someone always gets hurt, of course it was me. We actually went for an entire semester and towards the end i couldn't take it anymore, he still kinda treats me like crap. Now a new guy has entered the picture and I just realized he just trying to do the same thing, but I'm not going for it this time I want and deserve more. You are always using a person even if both parties agree, you are using them for one reason and one reason only. No good can come from friends with benefits I completely agree.

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