A few years back my single friend went to a Halloween party dressed as a sexy UPS worker: Tight brown shirt and short skirt...low cut white blouse... clipboard in hand. She would walk up to different guys at the party and inquire very seriously, "Sir, how large is your package?"
I have never been as brazen. But I can say, if I had worn my costume exactly the way it had arrived from Ebay, I would have masqueraded as Velma the Scooby Doo prostitute. Oh my gosh! The X-Large skirt might as well have been made from kindergarten felt in a size X-small. The top was so tight I practically split the arms. Instead I just used the wig and glasses and purchased my own skirt and top from Target. Combined with Rex dressed as Fred, and my kids as Scooby and Daphne, I was really pleased with the turn-out.
It does make me ponder, however, why so many female costumes are about sex. Since when did Dorothy traipse through Oz in thigh highs? Why does Bat Girl need a thong? And what's up with the police women and garters? "You're getting a ticket for being too sexy...Wow, is that a gun in your pants or are you just happy to see me? Wait! Don't shoot!"
Lest you think I don't know how to have fun, I can assure you that I'd absolutely wear this stuff for Rex. But I would probably think twice about going out to a party parading as a show girl... I mean... a "nurse" who forgot her panties.
Or if I was going to wear this stuff... after all, why not have fun if you can pull it off... then I wouldn't then be frustrated that the male trick or treaters were only interested in me turning tricks.
If the old saying is to "Dress for success" then even with Halloween, I'd be clear what message I'm sending. Ex: If I'm only out ot have fun, then perhaps a cowgirl who has clear intentions of riding something other than a horse be just fine. But if I'm looking to meet my Prince Charming, I'd make sure my Cinderella costume didn't come with a see-through corset.
For the record, this website is my version of Halloween: Candy, family and fun. Yeah, it's old fashioned, but that's the way I roll. Some day even the sexy fairies from the above website are going to be a bit pudgy for their mini skirts and wings. I figure I'd join the traditional club a bit early.
What are your thoughts on these costumes? Am I being a total prude? Guys, do you just love them? And gals, do you ever get frustrated at the selection of gear available these days for us? Check out the above ad. There's zero pretense about what they are selling. "Sexy costumes"... "Available in plus size!"
What are you going as for Halloween this year? I'm going as a tourist in a pair of pants with imprints of James Dean, Marilyn Monroe, Humphrey Bogart, Charlie Chaplin and a huge American flag splashed across my ass. Come on, now, that's sexy.
* Photo from Halloween Express where you, too, can spend your hard earned dollars to wear cheap clothing. Or you can just get out of bed in your undies and bra and not spend a dime. The outfits are about equal to that anyway.
Posted by Andrea Frazer
Good Housekeeping
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