User post: Can my marriage survive such betrayal?

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  Posted by Yogurt Lover Wed Sep 16, 2009 7:25pm PDT

  I'd say have an abortion, and just keep your trap shut to your husband. Somethings are better left unsaid.

  But this is coming from me......... and most on Shine are against abortion.

  I would kick the roommate out too.

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  Posted by GirlyGirl© Wed Sep 16, 2009 7:30pm PDT

  Whoo, darlin', you are going down a slippery slope here. You can either not talk about it, and make your husband the happiest man in the world, or spill like some woman on Maury Povich. I'd opt for the former. A woman's heart is a deep ocean of secrets, and I'd keep it that way. Just some friendly advice...Take care, hunny. GirlyGirl ♥

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  Posted by elsita_reyes Wed Sep 16, 2009 7:38pm PDT

  Oh my goodness. Woman, know that you are not alone in this. The good thing is that you have admitted that you did wrond and recognize your fault. The first thing you have to do is forgive yourself so that you can work towards a solution. Tell your husband before its too late. you cannot live a lie if not for you then for the child you carry. Let it go before it eats you alive. Above all, have faith that all will be well. I strongly believe that marriages like this can be saved if there is a such thing as love between two people. STAY STRONG and dont un away from your problems ever. You will survive this obstacle no matter what happens.

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  Posted by confusedandbroken Wed Sep 16, 2009 9:55pm PDT

  Okay I am going to be bluntly honest.

  If you really loved your husband you wouldn't of cheated. The reason you want him now could be because your pregnant. Think about how you really feel and what you really want. Then tell your husband everything. He is going to be very mad and upset. I would not start out with "I'm pregnant" Confess then tell him about the baby.

  Kick the roommate out ASAP!!!!

  Oh-you may want to get checked for STD's. Ever heard of a condom???

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  Posted by Robert Wed Sep 16, 2009 10:51pm PDT

  He is gonna leave you if you tell him but if you don't tell him and he finds out further down the road that the child isn't his, he will absoulutely hate you forever, and I mean HATE with a passion. By the way, you must not be very smart if you didn't use birth control.

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  Posted by Christopher Wed Sep 16, 2009 11:12pm PDT

  Truthfully, it would be a MIRACLE if he stayed with you. You have created a mess. Does the friend know that you are pregnant? First, off you and your husband were already on the outs before your affair. I suggest you level with him and be prepared to be a single parent because from what you describe your husband isn't the sensitive type. If he forgives you, be advised the stress between the two of you will not improve until he learns if the child is his or not.

  The ONLY way I can see the smallest possibility of your marriage being saved is if the child IS your husband's. If the child isn't his be prepared for him to backslide on staying with you (if he doesn't bolt for the door after hearing your secret). If you choose to be deceptive (i.e. not tell him about the affair) you WILL be found out maybe not now but in the future. Secrets this big, have a way of popping when you least expect it and at the worst time. Live and learn.

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  Posted by denise Thu Sep 17, 2009 12:31am PDT

  If you love your husband and want to keep him get an abortion, kick the roomate out so you won't put yourself in that perdicament since you can't controll yourself, and don't tell anyone ever. Take it to the grave. Don't even tell the dog.

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  Posted by Heldrine Thu Sep 17, 2009 2:00am PDT

  pls i am upset with your behaviour, how there you sleep with your husband,s friend to the point of geting pregnant? to my own poin fo wiew,explain things to your husband if he is ready to listen and keep the pregnancy

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  Posted by pwsgirl Thu Sep 17, 2009 5:09am PDT

  First of all, and this is MY opinion, I hope you will NOT consider an abortion. Whether or not the child belongs to your husband, he needs to know about it. I would begin by telling the roommate that the relationship is over and he needs to find a place to live OTHER than yours. Secondly, you have to confess everything to your husband and face the consequences. I would imagine he will be very hurt, angry, and may even ask for a divorce. You have admitted that you have done wrong, but every decision comes with a price, good or bad. For the child's sake, you need to get this into the open now. You also need to let the other man know that there is a possibility that he may be a father. Do a lot of praying and I hope things work with your marriage if it is truly what both of you want.

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  Posted by None Thu Sep 17, 2009 5:48am PDT

  What disgusting human beings "Yogurt Lover" & "Bluealky" are God damn selfish monsters and thinking someone could actually live with themselves doing the s--- you are telling her to do, an abomination, man, you cannot trust anyone in this world, first off, trifling lady, TELL HIM ASAP!!!!!!!!! The more you wait the more it gets worse, there will NEVER be a good time to tell him, so just let it out, he has the damn right as your husband that you vowed to love and honor, to know and make a CHOICE to slap you upside the head and get that baby tested and your ass tested and see if he wants to stay with you and his "friend." I know why you did it, because when something is too good, to be true, people freak out, and want to ruin it. TELL HIM, you owe it to him and your child. And having an abortion is an easy way out, DEAL with your consequences and be a woman and take responsibilites for your actions! No one gets a second chance, and you aren't anyone special to deserve one after what you have done. He will hate you more if you don't tell him.

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