Love + Sex

Saturday, December 5, 2009

User post: How Much Time Do Couples Actually Spend Together?

My husband and I are in the fortunate situation right now that we both work from home together, meaning that we see each other quite a bit. I remember back in the day when I was working full-time in a demanding job that not only did we barely spend time together, but when we did see each other I was so very tired of talking to people all day that I really didn't want to engage with him at all when I was home. I just wanted to sleeeeep

That's why we introduced our weekly date nights into our relationship. We were sick of lying on the couch watching TV night after night, and I thought that if we just put some structure around one night out a week, it would be a lot more achievable. It turned out to be true.

Do you and your sweetie get enough time together?

The Office for National Statistics finds that on average couples spend two to two-and-a-half hours a day together, including weekends.

And what do we do when we’re alone with our loved ones? Watch TV (one third of all the time spent together), eat (30 minutes) and do housework together (24 minutes). Whoopee. Married people spend half an hour more together than people who cohabit. Retired couples spend only four hours a day together. (Are they avoiding each other?)

But it got me thinking … how much time do you people out there get with your sweetie? In between busy careers and social lives, how often do you get to see your lover? Do you have date night regularly to ensure quality time once a week? Do you pass like ships in the night on completely different schedules? Do you socialize in the same circles? Do you live in each other’s pockets and love it?

These days, although we work and live together, we do make an effort for time apart as well. We socialise separately quite a bit, and we have our own hobbies. And yes, we still do date night every week!

Note: I highly recommend that if you're finding you don't get enough time with your partner that you do implement regular date nights and use them to spend quality time communicating. We have a site full of date ideas and here is a post full of Stay-home Date Ideas for Parents.

You can follow me on Twitter @30dollardate or on Facebook @DateIdeas
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Comments 1-10 of 36
  • high desert gypsy's Avatar
    Posted by high desert gypsy Sun Sep 27, 2009 9:10pm PDT

    Now make a deduction for time that the kids get? That two & 1/2 hours of "quality time" is long gone!

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  • 30DollarDateNight.com's Avatar
    Posted by 30DollarDateNight.com Sun Sep 27, 2009 9:23pm PDT

    High Desert Gypsy, you're absolutely right: having children (of any age) reduces the daily time spent together by about an hour!

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  • annie's Avatar
    Posted by annie Sun Sep 27, 2009 9:39pm PDT

    Last kid left for college one year ago. Oh. WOW.

    After 34 years together: still fantastic! We hadn't had the opportunity in our OWN HOME to sit buck naked or drive me around the living room until I have road carpet rage on my spine!

    On any given weeknight: 4 hours: unless he's with colleagues after his workday, playing a set of handball, or maybe he's got enough daylight left go for a quick nine holes...

    I feel that same independence: he just MAY get a call that MY office is having wok drinks and does he want to join us ie" o he COULD stay home and masterbate nad POUTl

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  • andrear's Avatar
    Posted by andrear Sun Sep 27, 2009 9:57pm PDT

    with 4 kids pre-k to high school and his busy navy career and full time student status we still manage after 11yrs of marriage to spend a good amount of quality time 2gther he wworks 1mile from home and comes home for lunch and after the kids are tucked into bed and we manage a date night every 2weeks its important to make the time to spend togther otherwise whats the point....

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  • George's Avatar
    Posted by George Mon Sep 28, 2009 8:57am PDT

    its great to have your view

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  • Melissa's Avatar
    Posted by Melissa Mon Sep 28, 2009 9:06am PDT

    My boyfriend and I of almost 3 years typically spend about 3 hours a day together about 3 days during the week. We do not live together, but we try our best to make time for each other. Both of us have busy jobs, long days...I hope it stays the same once I enroll in a Masters program.

    On the weekends, we typically devote one day together and the other day we try to spend together as well or spend it with our families and/or running errands.

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  • Robyn's Avatar
    Posted by Robyn Mon Sep 28, 2009 10:29am PDT

    My SO and I spend from 6pm on in the afternoon and all weekend provided he isn't work OT or on the one weekend a month drill. There are two weeks out of the year he is out of the country with military. I enjoy every hour we have together!

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  • None's Avatar
    Posted by None Mon Sep 28, 2009 10:49am PDT

    Wow! Tell me what you are doing to stay home!!

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  • HEATHER's Avatar
    Posted by HEATHER Mon Sep 28, 2009 3:29pm PDT

    for the past few months, pretty much every hour of everyday.

    he starts working soon though, so eh five hours a day, not including sleep.

    we love our time together. :)

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  • HEATHER's Avatar
    Posted by HEATHER Mon Sep 28, 2009 3:30pm PDT

    we live together btw *

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Comments 1-10 of 36

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