Who looks stupider the cheating husband or his ignorant wife?

We see far too often in the media, and in our own personal circles, a cheating husband running around town with another woman and seemingly having the time of his life, while his wife sits at home in a state of ignorance or non-acceptance. As a betrayed wife myself, I often wondered if people viewed me as stupid because my husband chose to publically disregard our marital vows, and in my opinion, humiliate me in front of others. I personally have never viewed myself as stupid, but rather feel that any man who would trade in a Mercedes for a Pinto is the one who is stupid. I must admit, though, that I sometimes view other betrayed wives as stupid for either not knowing their man is cheating on them, or not doing anything about it.  I know I should be ashamed for thinking that way, I mean isn't that the ultimate example of throwing stones from a glass house? I just can't seem to shake this perception though, perhaps because deep down inside, or not so deep, I may be attempting to ignore my own feelings of stupidity.

On the contrary, I feel sorry for men when their wives are cheating on them and look at the cheating wife as a no good loser. I have no idea why I view these situations differently, and am wondering if others feel the same. I guess what I'm asking is, do you think the wife of a cheating man looks stupid if she doesn't know about the affair but should? If she knows about the affair and ignores it? If she stays with a cheating spouse? Or do you think the cheating husband looks like an idiot for risking so much by having an affair?  Is it different when the person having the affair is a woman?

When I look in the mirror I don't think I look stupid, but do others? I really need to know this.

dm~
http://www.ultimatebetrayal.com