Love + Sex

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Why do women in polygamist Mormon sects dress like that?

You've been wondering about it since Big Love started airing on HBO: The big frontier dresses that went out of style with Little House on the Prairie, the high-top braids that remind us of high school in the '80s, the lack of any makeup, not even some basic mascara and lip gloss...what gives?

Of course, when you consider that the Texan polygamist sect in the news of late, the one headed up by Warren Jeffs, may have engaged in some serious child abuse--sexual and otherwise--the outfit question seems incredibly crass and superficial. There are more important questions to ask, like did anyone let her adolescent daughters be married off to men four times their elders and forced to have sex and then babies with them?

However, the answer to the wardrobe question actually reveals a lot about the sexual control of women in such polygamist Mormon sects: Dress the same to squelch your individuality, tie your hair back and cover up so as not to entice men, and wear old-fashioned clothes to help keep you segregated from a modern world where women have the right to wear what they want, marry who they love, sleep with whom they choose, and reproduce when they decide the time is right.

On Friday, The Early Show had a former member of such a sect on air to discuss this issue: "It's a way to keep the women separated from everyone else so that--and it also does affect your individuality and, you know, you're not allowed free expression as far as what you're allowed to wear." Read more here and then thank your lucky stars you were born into a culture that lets you shop at Forever 21 well into your 50s, even if you shouldn't.

Related Links from Daily Bedpost and Glamour:

Syndication:

From the Community…

Comments 1-10 of 22
  • Viv's Avatar
    Posted by Viv Mon Apr 21, 2008 12:35pm PDT

    I feel so bad for these women. It's amazing how horrible their living conditions are and yet they are so brain washed to believe that it's okay. :(

    Report Abuse
  • marjorie's Avatar
    Posted by marjorie Mon Apr 21, 2008 2:20pm PDT

    They dress like that so whatever old, hairy, sweaty, stankin, freak they married to won't want to have sex with them but every once in a while!!!

    Report Abuse
  • Andygirl's Avatar
    Posted by Andygirl Mon Apr 21, 2008 3:26pm PDT

    gosh, this was an eloquent article, but I'm saddened to see the ingnorance, bigotry, and judgemental nature of your readers (with exception). and may I point out that these people are not mormon? they are part of a fundamentalist sect which has no affiliation with the mormon church.

    i don't want to stoop to the racist, anti-semitic, and inane language for fear of hypocrisy, but I will say this: this is sad. and I feel for these women and not because they had to dress like pioneers, which is not the worstthing in the world. women once dressed like that everyday as it was the fashion.

    what makes me sad is the sadness and defeat in these women's eyes. take a moment and try not to judge them. try and see the abuse and pain they've felt and the control asserted over them through indoctrination.

    this is what has been thrust into their minds since birth. how hard it must be for them to understand what's happening to them. how do they juggle the guilt and simultaneous relief? how they must miss their old lives, however painful they were, because that was all they knew.

    these poor poor women. they are constantly in my heart these days. I feel their pain and I pray (in my own way) that they will find happiness.

    Report Abuse
  • justgettingby's Avatar
    Posted by justgettingby Mon Apr 21, 2008 4:52pm PDT

    Hey Butch, go read a book or something...get off the internet until you can be nice.

    Report Abuse
  • marie's Avatar
    Posted by marie Mon Apr 21, 2008 5:48pm PDT

    butch--what is your problem? you do not seem to recognize abuse--both physical and emotional.

    Report Abuse
  • Theresa's Avatar
    Posted by Theresa Mon Apr 21, 2008 6:42pm PDT

    I really don't care what these women wear. Having a dresscode does not make you brainless. The purpose of the dresscode is to take away vanity and to not look promiscuous in any way, or in any way that would cause someone else to sin by looking at you in a way they shouldn't. It's their religion and there's nothing wrong with having a religion. Others should respect their decisions to dress the way they feel they should and respect their religion as well. What's disturbing is the sex at such a young age, the abuse, and the polygamy. Rape and abuse is not allowed in their religion or any other form of religion with God in it. Polygamy is illegal in the U.S., statutory rape is illegal in the U.S., and physical/emotional abuse is illegal in the U.S. No matter what their religion allows, they still have to abide by U.S. laws because they are citizens of the U.S.A and are living here as well. They just need to wait til the ladies are of legal age, marry one woman, with no abuse in the relationship and they're good. My question is how come the women have a dresscode and the men don't? Or do the guys have dresscode to?

    Report Abuse
  • BrittanyF's Avatar
    Posted by BrittanyF Mon Apr 21, 2008 6:47pm PDT

    Butch, you don't make any sense. And whats up with the whole "white" thing. Why does race play a part in this??????

    Report Abuse
  • Shannon W's Avatar
    Posted by Shannon W Mon Apr 21, 2008 7:33pm PDT

    why are u calling people butchs

    Report Abuse
  • JustinaM's Avatar
    Posted by JustinaM Tue Apr 22, 2008 2:08am PDT

    I was dating a guy that was from a pligamist family,They were from Colardo city, Utah.He has 25 bro"s-&-sis"s,2 moms and 1 dad.They way they dress is so no one looks at them and finds them attraive or sexy.Thay all look a like and you can"t see there skin so their is nothing to look at but there hair and clothes.These women chose this they can get out if they want,out of 25 kids only 7 remain in that lifestyle.They do everything that we do except they have to have someone with them at all times.Hell even we do that sometimes!!His brothers and sisters that remain in that lifestyle r really neat to be around because they r so detacatied to there lives and they really show it.Any more questions email me at purplesage29@yahoo .com(my name is Jessie)

    Report Abuse
  • JustinaM's Avatar
    Posted by JustinaM Tue Apr 22, 2008 2:17am PDT

    I agree with the Texas thing, leave those people alone,They have a rite to protect there own.Just like we do.The state is hurting those kids not the parents,they are raised in a NON violent,NON phiscial,NON yelling house hold,They r more loving than alot of other parents and they have more patience then MARY POPPINS.OH ALexus you don"t know what you are talking about so shut your mouth,maybe you are the hairy one and no one wants to sleep with you.I met up with Jerry last nite and he is still a good person hairie or not hairie.LOL

    Report Abuse
Comments 1-10 of 22

leave your comment

You must sign in to post a comment

Sign In for personalized information

New User? Sign Up

Updates Chatter on Shine…

Love Byte

Skip the multiple-choice quiz, and read up on if you're a mom, a nag, too clingy, or perfect in every way. Aren't we all?