The bars at Dewey Beach, DE are very close together alongthe water. This makes for an unfortunatesituation when the night ends: several bar crowds travel down varioustributaries emptying into a debaucherous circle in the road. It looks like those sections of crashingwaves where three of four separate waves come together and the water looks allconfused and twisted.
It was in this mess one night where my friend and I foundourselves trying to locate the rest of our group. As we hung out there watching the crazinessfly by, a cute girl materialized out of the mass of people and grabbed myfriend and started kissing him.
Somehow, the girl became detached from my friend (probablybrushed off him by some passing drunk) and ended up in my arms. We then proceeded to makeout in thecircle. After a few minutes the rest ofmy friends managed to show up and we decided to go to a party at a friend'shouse.
As I started off with my friends, the girl called after me:
"Aren't you coming with me," she asked.
There was no conversation with my friends. We all knew what had to be done. I joined the girl and her friends-a mixtureof guys and girls-and my friends continued on their way to the party.
My new group was not very talkative. I felt like an interloper. I didn't care, though. I felt spiteful bliss that I was going toinfiltrate this group and makeout with the girl.
The group decided to stop off to pick up a pizza. As we left the pizza parlor, one of the guyspassed the pizza to me:
"Here you go dude, carry this to our place? Thanks."
http://www.adamwade.com/blog/archive/2008_08_01_archive.shtml
What an obnoxious assertion of dominance. I swallowed my pride and continued on withthe group down the street. My makeoutgirl was jumping around in the front of the group and I could feel myconnection with her slowly dying. Witheach step I grew more and more annoyed that I was carrying a pizza home forthis group. Was it worth it to be totalPizza b---- just so I could makeout with this girl...who probably didn't knowwhether I was me or my friend who she had just made out with too?
None of these people were talking to me. I finally snapped.Some drunk came up to me in the street andsaid:
"YES PIZZA!"
I said: "Want it? Takethe whole thing."
With that, I was free of the pizza. I felt a renewed sense of liberty as Icontinued behind the group. I gave awaythe pizza out of spite, and I'd makeout with this girl out of spite.
When we got to the door of the apartment, the entire groupturned around and looked at me.
"Where's our pizza," asked the one who had handed it to me.
"I don't know," I mustered. "
In the background, I saw the cute girl fall onto the couch,totally ready to make out.
"You can't come in here," said the group leader. He shut the door.
I then proceeded to get lost all over the beach town ofDewey trying to locate my buddies at the party. When I finally found them, I entered the door to my friends cheering forme. The poor guys thought that I hadmadeout with the girl. I shook my head"no" and the cheers turned immediately into "boos".
Funny how otherwise uncoordinated drunks manage tocoordinate obnoxious noises.
My friends were astonished that I had given away the pizza,even at the risk of possibly not getting to makeout.
This is a great example of the tightrope one must walkwhentrying to makeout with a random girl. There are so many things that can go wrong getting to her place. Do not rock the boat. Accept small sacrifices, like carrying pizzafor a bunch of people you hate. Andnever, ever, do anything out of spite.
Have you ever been very close to making out with aguy, but you or him does something that completely stops it fromhappening? What reasons have you had forsending guys home prematurely after you've brought bring them home? Can't beanything as goofy as giving away pizza, can it?
Posted by Rich
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