5 tips for dining out with kids

I have 3 boys (7yrs, 5 1/2 yrs, 10 months) and another on the way, and we have eaten out regularly since the oldest was born with no issues!

Its important to start going out while they are young, so that they are accustomed to it. It's also important to choose your restaurants wisely! Avoid any venue where your huge brood may be ruining someone else's evening. Call ahead and ask if you're not sure. We stick mostly to chains that cater to families, but because of this, my children know how to behave on the rare occasion that they've been invited out to a nicer venue (even weddings, etc).

Its also important that the child is not sick, tired, or starving when you arrive. Plan ahead. Give them a small snack. Don't skip naptime. Make sure they've had time to run around BEFORE trying to get them to sit through a meal. Let them know that their best behavior is expected, and don't be afraid to offer an incentive if a particular meal is going to be boring for them, but is important to you! (dollar store is great for this!) Definitely bring small, quiet toys or something for older children to read if you know there will be a long wait.

Also, you have to be prepared to leave if things don't work out. If Jr. starts to throw a tantrum, pack him up immediately and ask for your food to be wrapped. Take him/her out to the car so that other patrons are not disturbed, and let any other adult with you gather the rest of your belongings/food.

As for the floor - I agree that its important to pick up what your kids toss down there (my 10 month old is in the drop it and giggle phase, making this extremely important!) and I always tip extra when I have kids in tow!

I love eating out with my daughter, however we do choose appropriate restaurants. I would never take her to a romantic restaurant, what would be the point? She wouldn't enjoy it and neither would we. We love trying new places and I find that going during lunch is far easier because she's not eating later than normal and restaurants turn and burn tables faster at lunch so you get your food a little faster so we are in and out in no time.

This is a really good post on handeling the little ones when out to eat... I just nip the whole "acting like a monster" thing right away (I have taken my little girl and sat in the car until she calmed down) and now 97% of the time eating out is no big deal....

It's all about going at an off time, and knowing in advance what you're ordering. One issue I have, though, is when the restaurant seats families in booths next to each other, because kids feed off each other. My child can be golden until another child sits by us.

Please, Please, PLEASE - do not take your small child to an expensive, romantic restaurant. My hubby and I (and every other couple trying to have a night out) did not come to hear your child crying, squealing, and complaining. Your child may be the center of your universe, but it is not the center of everyone else's.

Like Angel we nipped it in the bud when our child acts up nothing like a warning then follow through with a trip to the car seat if they won't behave. It only took one trip and we never had a problem again.
Also we would tend to go to a more family friendly restaurants one with loud music so that if they act up it's a little less noticed. And we always make sure that the floor is the same as when we came in.
Also, tip well I have many friends that say that they hate waiting on families because there is more work and they can be lousy tippers. I hate that we get dropped into that group because I do tip well and want to be served well to. But that's a whole other can of worms.

Just say no to electronics at the table. Activity books and other things to keep the child's interest are better because they can still interact with the family, electronics take the childs full attention and they will never learn decent table manners. It pains me to see families where the kids have an earbud in their ears or texting away. Dinner is a family or party event, isolating yourself is high on the list of bad table manners.

And to the parents. If you want to bring a child to a nice restaurant, thats all cool. But if you can't keep them under control then yes you ARE limited to your choices. People don't go to high class restaurants just for the food. The atmosphere is a big part of any restaurant from chilis to a five star french restaurant. Ruining the atmosphere is ruining half of the experience.

When I was a kid if I acted up at a restaurant, I didn't eat there, I got a can of soup for dinner when we got home. If I really made a mess, I got a pre-soup spanking. The result was after 6 years old I was a respectful client of the restaurant. I never made a scene and used please and thank you. Obviously thats where good parenting kicked in. If your kid is 6 and up and still cries and makes trouble I suggest a reevaluation of your parenting tactics because that behavior doesn't go away on its own.

Also, one thing is that restaurants are no longer an "event." Going to restaurants more than once a week is not just bad for you, but it sets a bad example for your children. They never see the need to learn how to cook and become independent. I know grown men and women who still only know how to throw together ramen or a PB&J when they aren't getting fast food or ordering out. They don't need to leave the house knowing how to make hand-rolled manicotti filled with a sauteed portabella mushroom and ricotta cheese filling. But knowing basic food preparation will give them much more independence, and its a skill that can be learned early on that builds confidence....and they'll be making you dinner. geez, now I'm starting to sound like Alton Brown.

Wow, didn't mean to write an essay. End result though: If you can't be a parent and control your kid, don't spoil other people's dinners. Stay home. You may have the right to go to a restaurant, but others have a right to enjoy themselves, so don't put the blame on others for complaining. It not style cramping factor, but the fact that they just paid for something and its was ruined by people who can't control their children.

I like this very much. I personally love number 3: Introduce your kids to new flavors. Asian restaurants, especially Vietnamese, Chinese, and Thai ones, are often casual, full of big tables of families, and loud. Small-plate restaurants, like Spanish tapas places, allow easy sharing (and if things go south quickly, you can make an exit without having to cancel your entrée order).

I wished my parents did that to me when I was young.

Well I will be honest, kids are not usually a problem at the restaurant that I work at. When problems arise is when parents don't understand what exactly they are doing by doing nothing. I admit the place I work is family friendly but that is because we accept all types (we serve singles, workers on break, nearly anyone you can think of) but that does not mean we are not a Chuck E. Cheese. The parents assume that when a place is family friendly it means servers will clean up any mess your child makes. This is not true. Family friendly means families can come and no one will make a fuss if your child makes a little noise, it does not mean chairs, tables, plates, etc are toys on a playground. We even have a separate place for children to go if they don't want to sit at the table that is within view of the entire establishment. One parent didn't want her child playing in it saying it was germ covered by other children, what she missed was her child crawling on the floor that had not been cleaned since before the dinner rush. Parents just need to be mindful of their children plus aware of what and who the eatery caters to.

I love this post! This is how we deal with eating out and our 2 year old. She's been with us since day one and we always go out around her nap schedule. We want her refreshed and at her best, too. Not cranky and difficult. I think we have only had to remove her from a restaurant once, and she was really little and had a particularly bad case of diaper rash that made her upset.

She knows to say please and thank you to the wait staff. And she always flashes them a big smile.

Plus we never try to take her some place where we know kids will not be welcome, like a date or special occasion restaurant. Family friendly with good food and waiters that understand is the best.

And if you take them out as often as you can from the time they are little, they will get what is expected of them really quickly.

I think it IS the responsibility of the waitstaff to clean up the mess... and I was going to expensive restaurants with my family when I was 5... and yeah I sometimes made a mess, but it's a good way to teach a child manners, because IF they do make a huge mess, you get to go home, and the bus boy can clean it up. It is their FREAKING JOB after all... I'm sick of all of you part timers that think you're better than us. Get a real job, How's that!?

I would like to take a moment to comment on David's reaction to all of this. You are down right mean. I understand that you did not pay to hear children screaming, but this life. Get over it. I am sorry that any kid has to deal with you on a daily basis. I try my hardest to make sure that my children are behaved in a restaurant but there is always that one time that something happens and they act out. Nobody is perfect. So my advice to you, is STAY HOME!!!!!!!!

From my experience, I took my child to restaurants since she was 3 months old. I took her to family cafe restaurants (not expensive / formal style restaurants - as a respect). I planned goint to the restaurants around her schedule to be appropriate for this age. She would sleep in her carrier. Most importantly, I would place my order right away.

When my child was mobile, she was sitting in a high chair. I would bring a snack size ziplock bag of baby crackers and ordered my food with some fresh fruit for us at the restaurant as soon as we got there. I would also bring her a couple of quiet toys for her to be entertained. However, I do not give them to her unless in the event she starts getting crabby.

My child didn't have the terrible two's. But had the terrible three's. Obiviously we didn't go out when she is misbehaving. When she is good, I reward her. I would tell my child in advance if she is good at the restaurant, she could have desert or that we'd go to the park.

My child has been to all kinds of restaurants - American, Mexican, Chinese, Italian, Middle Eastern (again, casual restaurants). At the age of 6, she is very well mannered in a fancy restaurant.

I have seen parents who ignore their kids crying, running around, etc. What is up with that? They need to set boundaries with their kids and also tip their waitstaff at least 18 - 20 percent tip.

I think David gave his parents a hard time.

i work at an Asian restaurant and I dont think its a good idea to bring kids. there is no kids menu and everything is spicy. Im sick of hearing parents complain that theres no chicken tenders or ketchup, I mean come on you're in an indonesian place! Also dont bring babies that need to be breast feed. no one wants to see that. not ever, and if the do, do you really want them looking at you? Please leave the kids at home.

you forgot to tell parents not to let their kids wander/run around the restaurant. as a former waitress, there is nothing more irritating than parents who let their kids treat the restaurant as if it were their playground. trying to maneuver around children while carrying trays of food=not fun. god forbid we spill something because of the child. the parents would probably have a fit...at the waitress, not the kid.

Hum....you forgot several things parents need to be aware of:

1. Adults that go out to dinner DO NOT want to be subjected to children's bad behavior.
2. Children in restaraunts should be seen and not heard unless the place is McDonald's or Chuck E. Cheese.
3. Children or babies screaming/crying/fighting is NEVER appropriate.
4. Children or babies throwing things or food is NEVER appropriate.
5. Children or babies walking or running around the restaraunt is NEVER appropriate.

Parents need to put the other diner's peace and quite above their need to eat out with their children.

"alcohol for mom and dad, and pancakes with smiley faces for kids." Really? I never thought I was a prude, but apparently I am one of the few people who doesn't believe in drinking at this kind of a family event. Wine with dinner? Sure. Parties? Family get-togethers? Of course. But brunch with your children? If alcohol is that important to you, I'd say you may need to examine yourself.

yeah here is one tip: babysitter. Nuf said.

Here's a great tip; if the restaurant is rated in Zagat with at least three stars do NOT take your kids unless they are AT LEAST 16 years old. Our wedding anniversary dinner has been spoiled two years in a row by unruly kids whose parents think it is OUR fault for being upset with them! In short, you love your kids; I don't, leave them at home where they belong!

I hate it when parents dont controll children. Im a mother of 2 and my kids know they do not act up when we go out. They do not run around when we are eating, they do not beg for things while we shop.

If you can not controll your kids then you shouldnt take them out simple as that. I dont know what makes people think its cute to when there kid is running around telling everyone hello while they are trying to eat but its not. Its annoying and dangerous. I personaly dont like most kids, they are brats and its the parents fault. Dont try to say you cant controll your child, you can you just dont want to deal with it.