Splash News
I knew it was only a matter of time before something happened to make me boycott "Jersey Shore" before Season 2 even began. I was teetering on the edge after I heard about a workout video from "The Situation." But now, Mike Sorrentino has done worse. He's officially landed a self-help book deal. Here's The Situation: A Guide to Ripped Abs, Grooming, and How to Keep Up With Your GTL is not a book that any human being should ever be subjected to. Does anyone really need help getting crispy hair and pre-cancer? Hats off to his ghost writer. At least that poor soul won't have to sign his/her name to that garbage.
The Frisky: 15 "WTF Were They Thinking Celebrity Tattoos"
Read on for some more self-help books that we wouldn't be caught dead reading.
Celebrity: Tyra Banks
Self-Help Book: Tyra's Beauty Inside and Out.
Sample chapter: "I me I me I me I me I me. You. I me I me I me I me."
Celebrity: Jennifer Love Hewitt
Self-Help Book: The Day I Shot Cupid: Hello, My Name Is Jennifer Love Hewitt and I'm a Love-aholic
Our Two Cents: We refuse to vajazzle myself to get a man.
Celebrity: Suzanne Somers
Self-Help Book: Knockout: Interviews With Doctors Who are Curing Cancer and How to Prevent Getting It in the First Place
Our Two Cents: Whatever you say, Dr. Somers. Oh wait, you're not a doctor?
The Frisky: 10 Reasons You Should Stop Playing Games And Start Being Forward
Celebrity: Whoopi Goldberg
Self-Help Book: Whoopi's Big Book of Manners
Our Two Cents: I wonder if there is a chapter about the polite way to respond to your friend's racial slurs?
Celebrity: Kim Cattrall
Self-Help Book: Being a Girl: Navigating the Ups and Downs of Teen Life.
Our Two Cents: Because you want your teenage daughter taking sex tips from Samantha Jones.
The Frisky: 13 Good Lessons We've Learned From Bad Exes
Celebrity: Shirley Maclaine
Self-Help Book: Sage-ing While Age-ing
Our Two Cents: Age is just a number and sage is just an herb. Keep the rest to yourself.
Celebrity: Jessica Simpson
Self-Help Book: I Do: Achieving Your Dream Wedding
Our Two Cents: Wedding advice from Jessica Simpson? Bwahahaha!
Posted By: Ami Angelowicz at The Frisky
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