Last year, back when Shine was just barely a zygote, I wrote about Booty Pop Panties ("the panties that make your booty pop!"), which are basically undergarments that make one's derriere appear bigger and fuller. While it's still unfathomable to me, a person with a significant enough rear, why anyone would want a larger backside, apparently there's a, ahem, big market for this sort of thing. So much so that legitimate lingerie companies (not just novelty designers with silly names) have started adding the enhancement pieces to their spring lines.
Take, for example, the ultra-pretty lingerie label Huit. it just released something called a Padded Shorty, a pair of serious underwear/shorts with two full butt cheeks built-in (they cost 30 British pounds, about $45).
I suppose for those who are completely assless, something like this could come in handy. It seems to aid in "filling things out" and might make one look sexier in a tight dress or jeans or shorts. But, who exactly are you trying to look sexier for? And, honestly, wouldn't that person figure something fishy was going on the minute he/she grabbed your butt and got a handful of foam?
This is my problem with all figure enhancements--they just seem so utterly false. Not in the plastic surgery fake way, but more in the vein of '70s sitcom hijinks. Using padding and other fabricated body improvements seems akin to wearing a toupe. I could see an entire episode of "Three's Company" based on, say, Janet's self-consciousness about her lack of butt, purchase of a Padded Shorty, and all the hilarious misunderstandings that would ensue. In the end, before the three roommates hugged next to all those plants and wicker, there would be some lesson about how Janet is perfect just the way she is, and then Jack would do something disgusting with the padded underwear and/or trip over them.
Huit, Just A Kiss Padded Shorty
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The butt-padding underwear trend: False advertising or a useful white lie?
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