How to Fight Fair with Your Best Friend
By Tyger Danger, GalTime.com
In any friendship, fighting is part of the deal. Take Jersey Shore's JWoww and Snookie. The former best friends are allegedly on the outs big time, even not speaking to each other, and reports say their spin-off series may be canceled! After putting up with years of Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi's drunken antics, Jenni "JWoww" Farley is said to have finally had enough. She's tired of being cast aside while Snooki tends to her constant romantic rollercoaster.
As the story goes, Snooki began to change last season when she and boyfriend Jionni fought and made up again and again while the cast filmed in Italy. The once happy-go-lucky meatball morphed into a dramatic, pathetic school girl, catering to each of Jionni's insecurities. On one of the later episodes in the season, Jionni dumped Snooki and called her a "whore" as she danced on a bar with her underwear exposed to the crowd. After the embarrassing televised break up, where Snooki hysterically berated Jenni on the cobblestone streets of Italy, Jenni still consoled her best friend's broken heart. But as soon as the couple got back together, the tension between the girls worsened.
Related: How Do You Break Up With A Friend?
Boys are a typical root of female fights, says Professor of psychiatry at the New York University School of Medicine and author of "Best Friends Forever: Surviving a Breakup with Your Best Friend" Irene S. Levine, PhD. That said, every battle over boyfriends need not be a blood bath- there are ways to fight fair with your best friend and healthily resolve the beef before it escalates.
"Admit it when you're wrong," Levine says. "When two friends have a big fight, it's hard to reconcile at the same level of intimacy. Apologize sooner rather than later before the rift snowballs into something larger. It's also always nice to try to make up for the infraction with a card, flowers or a meal."
When fighting with a friend, communication is key. Levine recommends women discuss the problem at hand when both parties are calm - which sometimes seems rare for some reality TV stars.
"If you are fighting too much, perhaps you need a break from the friendship or need to reduce its intensity," Levine says. "This may be difficult on reality TV, where the show must go on so women are forced to stay together regardless of their feelings."
MTV producers are well aware that viewers tune into Jersey Shore for the epic battles. But they are stumped on how to get the feuding friends, who were projected to bring in big ratings with their spin-off series, to live in the same city. Neither girl wants to budge. Jenni and her boyfriend Roger live a domesticated life in Toms River, N.J., while Snooki and Jionni have their hearts set on Hoboken. And to make matters worse, their boyfriends apparently hate each other.
People love to see women in cat fights, especially on reality TV, Levine says. She suggests Jenni and Snooki consider meeting with a counselor or therapist to get some objective help on reconciling before they agree to live together again.
"No relationship is perfect," Levine says. "Some type of conflict is bound to occur in any friendship, even very good ones, simply because two different people won't always see eye to eye."
If the two women really want to resolve their issues and move forward, "they both need to be able to listen and forgive."
Maybe the girls just need some time to come around. We're all hoping so because there is nothing we love to watch more than Snooki doing the Jersey Shore turnpike dance on top of a bar as Jenni shakes her head.
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