10 Reasons Not Have Kids Yet ... Or Ever

What a great article. I'm 34 and decided not to have children over 10 years ago. I have not changed my mind. Everyone has the right to choose whether to have children or not but it seems like those who choose not to, for the most part, are those who have given it more consideration. They too are the ones who receive more questions and disapproval about their choice. The comment that I hate the most is "you'll change your mind". This comment really means - you'll come to the 'right decision' in the end. In fact I am at the right decision for me. I do not want a child. Only people who really want children should have them. Having children is a 24/7 unpaid job, some people are happy to take that job, many take it but don't commit to it fully. With a regular job, it doesn't work out, you quit, walk away, no big deal. With parenting, it doesn't work out, you walk away, society has to step in and finish the job for you. So, When it comes to having children - choose carefully and take responsibility for your choice.

I don't want kids because I don't want to be trapped and kids are a flippin' trap. I do not want to be paying child support for any child whatsoever. I don't want to devote my time and energy to those rotten things they call children. But most of all, I LOVE MY FREEDOM!!! I have the time and freedom to do whatever I want and go wherever I want and that's the way I like it. And I'd rather devote my time and energy to my career then to some brat. My life is great without kids and that's the way I like it. And I don't care if anyone says that I'm selfish for not wanting kids. It's my decision, not anyone elses.

is that your uteris sticking out of your vagina?

Why would anyone have kids ?????????????
They totally screw up your whole life.

I just hate it when people say "their are already enough people in the world" I mean who decides what enough is? I for one don't believe in overpopulation. People are born and people die every day. Now if people suddenly stopped dying I'd get worried. But the fact is people live people die. And having traveled from one end of this country to another 4 times I have to say that there is plenty of empty space so until all that space is filled up then I'm not gonna worry. As that chick mother theresa said "how can you say there are to many children that is like saying there are to many flowers". It's fine if she doesn't want any of her own but who is she to decide that there are to many? Who are any of us to decide how many people should be on earth? What's the perfect number of people? What's the perfect amount of children? No one has an answer for that yet they say there are to many. Because there is no such thing as perfect and people should except that.

I have considered the "enough children in the world" philosophy. I decided to scrap it and here's why: I'm confident that if I had children, barring the hand of God, they would be good people with much to offer. I would do my best, they would have a good father (my beloved SO whose biological clock is ticking faster than my own) and a good, healthy environment. I, as their mother, would do my best to make sure they were a BENEFIT to mankind in general, and I rationalize that the GOOD they could do would outweigh their personal environmental toll. That one child that is or isn't born to anyone could someday be the one adult who solves a major environmental issue forever and pays for millions of people's ecological footprints. I still may or may not have children for myself, but if I choose not, it certainly won't be because there are too many people in the world. (There really are too many.) A sampling of my reasons for not having them yet and maybe ever...

How about: I really enjoy my full-time career?

How about: I am a smoker and if I'm not planning, for the first (insert usual length of time until a lady discovers a pregnancy) weeks, the child will be in a nicotine-laden body?

How about: I'm still a year away from my wedding? (I would like to be married and possibly move before any potential children)

How about: I may have an issue that could possibly lead to fertility issues?

How about: I really love my man and spending time with him (yes, sex too since you took the liberty to mention it), and am not ready for that relationship to take second-string? (Not that I would love him any less, mind you. Unfortunately just less often. ; )

It's a very personal decision whether or not to have kids. Motherhood is a surprise for some, and a long, difficult journey for others. For some people the difficult "motherhood" journey is spending a lifetime convincing other people "No, I REALLY don't want any children. Thank you. Oh? You want me to explain myself? UGH. Not again." Sometimes you parents of the world don't realize that what seems a stupid or insulting reason to you is actually important to the child-free individual. Of course you don't mind your child's puke. He's your child! But that doesn't mean others can't find it an aversion. To each his own, down with the judgment, respect one another.

Peace to all, be you childless or child-bliss.

I feel to make a list about why you shouldn't have kids, is a total bash on any parent. The funny thing is, the last girl that I meet who said that she hated kids, couldn't have them. Interesting huh? I'm a mother, and I still fit perfectly into the clothes that I wore in high school, so that one is a bunch of crap.

Kids or no kids, if you don't take care of yourself than at some point you will be out of shape.

breezy...my comment was an "opinion". Opinions are neither correct or wrong, they're just that "opinions or fellings." Also, just because people have stable finances and are highly educated doesn't always make them good parents! Money/finances are great...but, the greatest gift to a child is Love & Acceptance! :)

Posted by boundwaterfall Tue Sep 29, 2009 8:35am PDT
Um...I would just like to point out that "overpopulation" is neither a myth nor a value judgment. It's a natural, scientific concept. When any species grows so numerous that its geographic area lacks the resources to support it, the members of that species begin to starve and generally die a slow, painful death. Humanity is a little different because we are able to transfer resourced from one area to another, but our resources are still finite.

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BoundWaterfall, one million THANKS!!

MN

I say the things I say because people should see both sides. And I'm all for SOME people adopting. For some people it works. You say everyone has the right to not have kids, well I say everyone has the right to have as many kids as they want without adopting. And to be quite honest no it's not worth having a child for 5 years and then having them ripped out of your arms. Not to me. If I'm going to adopt a kids I want a 100% guarantee that they're not going to come back a little while down the road and rip the kid away from me. You make it sound like it would be so easy "oh I had this kid for 5 years but then the courts decided they go back to their parents. Oh well." I'm sorry but it doesn't work like that in my book. And no I'm no drunk I never drink (and no I don't think it's evil to drink I just don't do it). It's funny how you jump on my case for commenting on someones opinion that's put out there for us to comment on. If all opinions are valid then why are you trying to rip mine apart? Oh and thanks for all the name calling I missed feeling like I was in kindergarten with all those "witty" remarks they come up with. And yet again it's no ones decision how many people are on earth. What if your parents decided to stop before you because the world was to "overpopulated"? Then you wouldn't be here to argue. I bet your thankful your parents had you before this whole "let's not have kids" business took off.

From all the things being said here I can see some very real reasons to not have a child

1. Yes i believe we are overpopulated, no i am not "god" and I do not believe in god. I think that when there are hundreds of children living homeless and do not have enough food because there arent enough jobs or money for their families then yes i believe that we are over populated.

2. Some people maybe have good jobs and there for have been able to provide for them and their children and i think that is awesome, but you must realize that there are many many children and teens living in shelters and adoption agencies and really do need parents. It would be better for a couple to give them a good home than to have another child of their own if that is what they choose.

3. I have not made a decision if i want to have children or not. I have a friend who is about to be a first time parent. I am happy for her but i enjoy my freedom. I like to be able to wake up in the morning and do things that I want to do. I do help others and I help my community but I cannot see myself spending a large amount of my time devoted to another human being.

besides.... I like my margaritas with a double shot of tequila.. not a double stroller ;) lol

There have ALWAYS been homeless people. It's not gonna change if we stop having kids. And yet again I wonder why people feel they have the right to tell people if the want kids they should adopt. You people are the first to freak out when I say abortion is wrong you say that everyone should do as they want. Well what if I want 20 kids? Why should I have to adopt? Why is it me "telling you what to do with your bodies" by saying don't have an abortion wrong but your telling me what to do with my body by not giving birth to as many kids as I get pregnant with and just adopting right? Do you see the hypocrisy? I can't tell you not to have an abortion but you can tell me not to give birth to however many I want? How is that fair? If it's all about our "choice" then why are you trying to control people who don't believe in birth control and give birth to as many as they get pregnant with? I for one don't believe in birth control and plan on having however many kids God gives me. It's only fair if you people have the right to murder your children that we have the right to give birth to as many as we want. Until we stop abortions I don't think anyone should have the right to say whether people like me go on birth control. If it's all about making our own choice then mine is as valid as yours.

oh ps, i dont want kids. i'm fully capable of having them (as far as i know). but i've known since i was quite young that i didnt want the responsibility of it. i know i'm too selfish, its fine. my career is my baby and i need it to grow and thrive. same with my bank account. both go down the toilet if i dont use contraception. i have an IUD and its AWESOME.

Um, if my paretns decided not to have me it wouldn't matter because I WOULDN'T EXIST....Think about all of the unwanted children in the world, and then think about all the other kids people spit out every day. Shouldn't there be a balance? People only ever think of themselves.

amen frisky. some people love babies, and some people think they suck. baby lovers, keep them. i think they suck. for many more reasons than stated above.
how about : i love my waistline, and i don't want to risk never seeing it again?
how about: it took a whole painful season getting my new ski boots broken in, and i never want my feet to grow to have to get new ones?
how about: i can barely pay the bills as it is?

HOW ABOUT: (most importantly) i have a genetic disease (Hemophilia) that if i have a son, he WILL get? not putting any child through that. not fair to him.

Here is the best reason of all not to have kids: because you don't want them. And I say this as a mother of three who never wanted to have kids, but I am happy with them. If I had never had them I would still be a happy person. Leave other people alone and understand you don't have a right to comment on their parenthood status. We women beat each other up over this subject it is horridly sad.

Never have kids.......I have 4 and I have spent my life making sure they had everything they needed and in the words of Rodney Dangerfield, "I get no respect." I was kind, generous, loving, put their needs first, listened to them. NOw they are 28, 22,21,19 and they still take me for granted. I tried to take care of me too, but it was always a delicate balancing act and never just right. I am back to 240 pounds and am eating myself to death, literally. When will I ever just take care of me? Kids take, they do not give. Think hard before you go down this lonely road.

I agree with miss my family

I would really love to have a baby soon. but not right now. I'm only 20 and I know I'm not ready to handle a baby. Though the more I think about it the more I'm not really sure if I even want to have a baby. Its such a huge responsiblity.
No we dont have enough people on this planet. People are born and die everyday. It really is best for at least one couple to have at least one baby. What person wants to be old and have no one to help take care of them when they cant do it themselves.

It's so not bashing parents. This article was just making a joke based of CD's explanation for not having kids. There are a lot of people in the world, but that's not really a good reason not to have children. I think her point was you shouldn't be made to feel as if there's something wrong with you if you don't want a child. I personally don't like children, and yes I am able to have them. Which means my hubby will be getting fixed, we'll be using condoms, and anything else that will prevent pregnancy. If I could get a hysto I would (medical reasons and the fact that I just really don't want kids). I used to though, until I helped raise my neice the first few years. I was on potty training duty, teaching her the ABC's, etc. I was like the mom (and I think I was way too young for that responsiblity since I was still in junior high). I realized I didn't want any of my own. Then I started seeing the bad brats running around schools and neighborhoods and realized I totaly don't want any ever. I can't even stand to hold them now. I used to do that when a mother needed me to, but now I can't stand it. It's fine if somebody else wants children, but just not for me. Personal choice either way.