by Chiara Atik for HowAboutWe
There are two main channels of romantic interest for adults. First, there are the people you meet at a bar, at a party, or through an online dating site. In these scenarios, the mutual attraction and interest is often instant: you immediately ask each other out, or hook up, or date, or whatever.
- "I laugh really hard when you're within ear shot, and make sure I look super engaged with who ever I'm talking to."
- "I send you a link to an article about something we talked about once, in passing."
- "I get really dressed up when I know I'm going to see you and then act surprised/dismissive when you say I look nice. ('Really? Huh. I just came from work...')"
- "I listen to songs I think you'd like on Spotify and hope you see them on my Facebook feed."
- "I all of the sudden get buddy-buddy with your friends."
- "I tweet about things that aren't directly about you, but that I know will interest you."
- "I never leave the bar before you do -- I don't care how early I have to work the next morning."
- "I live in fear that you will somehow learn how often I visit your Facebook page."
- "I text you something random or 'funny' my coworker did, just to start the conversation."
- "I go out of my way to not seem jealous of other women, going so far as to force you to say tell another girl how pretty she is."
- "I change my GChat status to something I want you to see."
- "I find out everything I can about you and then pretend to be surprised when you tell me something about yourself in person."
- "I stand in the same circle as you but avoid eye contact and only talk to the person standing next to you."
- "If we're sitting at a table, booth, or bench, I will sit closer to you than to the person on my other side. I will make sure our arms accidentally graze each other."
- "I take advantage of every possible opportunity to "@" you on twitter."
- "I go out of my way to walk by you on the way to the bar."
- "I spend parties standing in your line of sight."
- "I dress inappropriately for events because you complimented that outfit another time. ('Aren't you cold?' '... no.')"
- "I google anyone I found out you dated/hooked-up with/were interested in, just to see how I measure up."
- "I make up a 'work question' that we need to have coffee/lunch/drinks to discuss, because I'd really like your professional opinion on the matter. (Ideally, I'd also like to make out.)"
- "I have Skype, gchat, and Facebook chat always up just in case you sign into one of the three messaging platforms."
- "I invite you to a party I'm throwing. And then quickly invite 100 other people so you won't suspect I singled you out."
- " I will remember a random fact or opinion you expressed a year ago, even when you don't."
Related: Does He Like You? 20 Ways to Tell
- "I Google myself so I know what comes up in case you randomly decide to google me."
- "I bring up a movie/concert/activity that I think you would like, in the hopes that you will express interest and that I can then casually say, 'Oh, do you want to come with?'"
- "I reply all to a group email that you're in just so my name comes up in your inbox to refresh your memory that I exist. I will labor over this reply for at least an hour before hitting 'send'."