The 5 Biggest First Date "Deal Breakers"

To be truthful, the coupon thing is not so much of a deal breaker for me as having a screwed-up, rude personality. I knew this great guy who I liked sooo much. I could tell he was attracted to me as well. After playfully flirting with each other for months, he finally ask me out.. he said 'hey I have some coupons to some great restaurants, you want to check some of them out with me..I know it sounds cheesy cheap,but he had so much personality that it came off cute and funny when he asked me..Plus like I said he was a great guy and I liked him. So I was game. He had pre-informed the restaurants about the coupons so it didn't feel awkward at all..in fact the food was magnificent and he turned out to be the best date I EVER had..AND we tried a few more restaurants with coupons on down the road.... I later discovered that he had been going through some difficult financial issues at that time that he didn't want to burden me with.at the same time he didn't want me to think he wasn't interested so he showed me the best time possible by the only means in which he could afford at the time. Well now he's back on his feet and we are 3 yrs in a wonderful relationship. We rarely use a coupon and we still have a great time when we go out..I love him....Now on the flip side, I've had guys who spent a crapload of money on our first/last date. One of them was so pretentious. I had to hear about how great and successful he and his inner-circle of people were..boring...I also had one so rude to the waiter that I left him at the restaurant in a state of embarrasment!...those are the kinds's of things that are dealbreakers for me...plus all the ones that Andrea listed:)

Some deal breakers for me on the first date are when the girl is super negative, critical, complains alot, drinks ALOT, militant athiest, militant vegan, or drops alot of f-bombs. And I have friends who smoke, which is fine, but I'm not down with smoochin' smokers.

I don't have anything that rivals Andrea, but for me I would have to say the biggest turn-off is negativity. My worst date ever I still remember her complaining about everything from the city she lived in to her job and family. And to top it off, she ordered some of the most expensive things on the menu.

As far as the deal breakers they listed, yeah showing up totally plastered would probably not get a second date with me. The others it depends. If it's an emergency then talking on the phone or tardiness can be forgiven. If it's just idle chit-chat then no. I do think there should be at least SOME common interests shared, but I do appreciate a woman who has different interests than me. As far as the coupon thing, I wouldn't really care. It's certainly not a deal breaker.

' "The deal breaker was that after enjoying a lovely dinner, the guy pulled out a coupon to pay for the meal. This was a first date. I have nothing against coupons, but it was unimpressive," said Lewis.'
It was a lovely dinner & he paid for it, but she complained about how he paid? This is the type of woman who isn't worth impressing. Ladies, don't take advise from her.

Asking me for sex, because he's "sure I don't get a lot of offers"; grabbing my hand and putting it on his magic stick; forgetting his wallet; ditching me at the bar, because his football team lost the game; and bringing his buddy along who heckled me until I left the restaurant in tears lol. True first date deal breakers :).

Negativity in general, and badmouthing his ex girlfriend/wife is a total turn-off. I actually don't mind splitting the check on a first date. Later if we continue going out and he or I wants to pick up the check than that's fine.

The coupon thing? Forgivable, though best done discreetly, because some people get uncomfortable with that kind of thing.

Deal breakers? Arriving drunk, or drinking too much; teasing past the point of being funny or criticism past the point of usefulness; too much talking, or expecting me to do all the talking; smoking/drug use; bragging about monetary and/or physical assets (gross!); chauvinism.

Deal breaker: she smokes.
Deal breaker: every comment leads to a complaint about something.
Deal breaker: a quick temper.
Deal breaker: she's a 'rules' follower, and won't talk about religion, politics, or anything else that can make a person interesting to be with.
Deal breaker: she worries about things like coupons...

Asking me what I drive, if jobs in my field make much money, etc. She's a gold digger.
Primping at the table. She's self absorbed and high maintenance.
talking/texting at the table. She's rude and self absorbed.
Caring about things like coupons. Because she's petty. Does the food taste different?
Catting about co-workers/people in general. See petty comment above.
Bringing personal drama. She's a drama queen and attention hound.

Wow, you get a FREE meal, and you're going to judge and complain how someone ELSE paid for it? Uh, no.

Answering the phone..In the middle of the date...!

Or my personal favorite, when he spends all night talking about how awful his last girlfriend/wife was. Check please!

when I listen I hear,when I look I see. I don't have to be stung to know it's a bee.

Past criminal activity, especially involving violence against women. Heavy-duty reliance on drugs and alcohol. Explosive temper. A general lack of ambition or drive for success in life. Rigid standards for acceptance of others, and a general lack of concern for people.

Those things usually never work themselves out. So, if you see these things, there shouldn't be any second dates.

My favorite first date ever (NOT): Meet a guy, through a friend. We meet up at a middle destination, and then he offers to drive from the middle destination to the restaurant for our 1st date. He picks me up in his Jeep. I thought cool. NOT. This guy drove 100+mph to get to where we planned. 1st Red Flag.

Putting your date in a potentially dangerous situation that could kill both of us. Get to the nice restaurant, do not have reservations, have to wait more than an hour. Not a big deal, just go with the flow. Decide to stop at the bar, the date starts to drink and get drunk. Guzzling a liter of beer per every 10 minutes. Trying to slow him down because dinner hasn't even started and he has to drive he Jeep with me in it at some point after. 2nd big Red Flag.

Miss the dinner reservation because he wants to continue to drink, and now at a Sports Bar to watch a Basketball game. I like sports, a lot, I don't mind watching, but I'm starving for food and want to eat the food we planned on with a reservation. Now taking his shirt off and waving it up around his head. 3rd Red Flag.

Ask to leave, and have him take me to my car so I can go home and put this experience in the past. He agrees, drops me off back at the middle destination where my car is, and I drive off. Gets better... I'm driving back to my house, and just as I get on the road, he has one of his police officer buddies pull me over for a possible DUI. Mind you, I had 1 drink all night because I thought I was going to have to babysit and then run for my life. 4th BIG RED FLAG.

He doesn't arrest me, obviously no signs of intoxication, but asks me to pull over and has his friend, who I was JUST on the date with, come pick me back up, because I am "unable to drive properly" at this moment. Now well after midnight. The cop I was just on the date with, picked me back up, takes me to a sketchy nightclub where he leaves me to play pool with the likes of Rick Ross, Lil Wayne, and other men who are known for drugs and weapons. He proceeds to go into the back of the club, buy cocaine and snort it. WARNING, in panic mode. Just walk outside calmly, and make a run for it once I'm not longer in his sight or the sight of the bar.

This had to have been the worst date in history. EVER. Talk about a person in a "higher" position who uses it against you. 215lb guy, public safety officer, uses his resources to get what he wants and to intimidate you all while threatening to "get rid of you" if you tell anyone in his department or call and make a complain to his personnel.

Can't believe I was able to date after this... I'm going with this story to Cosmo, lol.

To me the main deal breakers are girls who expect all men to be "manly" all the time, materialistic girls, girls that are the paragon of a female dog, and ugly or fat girls. It's not that I'm shallow but I like almost all men do have limits, it's fine if you are not pretty or a little chubby but I can't deal with it if you are hideous or severely overweight.

Texting every 2 minutes,answering a non emergency call,facebooking by phone every 30 seconds,telling me how bagged up you got at the last 3 parties you went to and how some dude you didnt know had to take you home,not knowing anything about current events,yet knowing about everything that Macys has on sale, telling me your 17 year old is already a father of a 1 year old,has no job,license or car,hasn't seen his father in 5 years and in the same breath,telling me you buy his cigarettes and you don't mind if he drinks,as long as you know about it. This actually happened to me on one date. Needless to say,i was planning my escape from this one. I wound up excusing myself,finding the waitress,taking care of the bill and just leaving her there. I saw more red flags on that one date than i probably saw in the entire time ive been dating since i was a kid. Screw that!!!

I thought I had dealbreakers when I first started dating, but I ended up being so desperate that I just let everything go. Now, I'd never be okay with a guy asking me about my weight and cup size or insisting that we do what he wants and getting fussy when I ask to do one thing I want to do. Bragging is also a huge turn off. I dated a guy who was disgusting, but he thought that because he had a trust fund, he was the greatest thing ever. I cringe at the mere thought of him today.

deal breaker

Unless the person, is really rude or dangerous, then they should get another chance. Coupons, in this economy, is something sensible. Trust me, I married a woman, who once checked our receipts and balanced our checkbook on Christmas Eve. Took all the fun out of the day.