By Sarah Daly, BounceBack Expert
Casual dating- it's fun, exciting, and a great way to get back in the saddle. But what if the saddle turns into the sack? Getting physical with someone isn't necessarily a bad thing. Two consenting adults may really enjoy each other's company. But what if you thought you just wanted a fling, only to discover that you're really falling for the guy (or girl)?
Being intimate too quickly can equal a bad set-up for a long-term relationship. According to Margaret Paul, Ph.D., "…sex without deep caring might be a physically satisfying experience, but it is flat emotionally and spiritually. It will almost always leave both people feeling like something was missing."
So how can you cross the bridge from lust to love? It's not too late to make a change.
5 Things You Can Do to Reset a Relationship:
1. Spend time doing other things together. Make plans for the two of you to do something such as take a walk, visit a museum, etc. In other words, begin dating. Through sharing conversation and laughs, you can build intimacy.
2. Keep your distance. Try not to be as available as you were before, and create some mystery. This actually draws people in, and makes you more desirable.
3. Switch things up a bit. Break your old patterns - did you always meet for drinks before heading back to his / her place? Try a movie instead.
4. Spend time with other people along with you. Make it a group activity with friends- this way you're sharing fun times, and the pressure is off to make it so physical.
5. No late night contact! That means no calling/texting/facebooking/twittering. Sit on your hands if you have to. Remember, you're trying to change your relationship into something more special, and you don't want to be just the late night hook-up!
Most importantly, be open and honest with yourself. Your self-worth is much too important to run the risk of feeling used. So if what you want is a long-term relationship, go for it!
Sarah Daly is founder of Flair Design, a home and event design business based in RI. Her design philosophy is that any space, on any budget, can be transformed to promote physical and mental well-being. Sarah's combination of learning from the Rhode Island School of Design, and 13 years of design experience, afford her creative vision with practical solutions in home re-design, staging, and everyday entertaining.
www.flairdesignri.com
BounceBack is changing the way people cope with heartbreak as a result of a breakup or divorce. BounceBack is a place to tell your story, get advice from experts, and share what you've learned with others in similar situations. We're here to remove the negative stigma around being heartbroken - this happens to everyone. And we believe everyone has the potential to bounce back to life and move forward. www.bouncebacktolife.com
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