Moving Out and Moving On
By Sarah Rae for BounceBack.com
It doesn't matter whether you're the one who called it quits or not, moving out of a place you shared with your partner is a difficult task. A home is something you build together. Your lives were integrated, boundaries torn down. Having to dismantle that home after a break-up adds insult to injury. How do you remember what's even yours in the kitchen? Moving out is hard enough without frayed nerves, hurt feelings, and the prospect of leaving someone behind.
Related: The Breakdown of a Break-up
There are some rules of thumb that can make the process less painful. Keep reminding yourself that you never know what the future brings.
1. Don't put it off. No matter how much emotional turmoil is sure to arise, you need to do it sooner rather than later. If you or your ex start dating again, you'll be sorry you put moving your things on the backburner. Whether you don't want to face the reality of moving or you aren't ready to give your ex space, remind yourself that you don't know what the future holds. Time to get moving.
Related: Bouncing Back When You Can't Move Out
2. Rise above pettiness. Simply put: Don't take things that aren't yours. Maybe you want a reason to talk to your ex in the future or maybe you just want to hit them where it hurts. But you don't want to add a guilty conscious to the upset. When your packing your things, make decisions you can live with.
3. Play nice. Things you acquired while you were living together might require discussion. You might even own some items that you never used but which your ex used all the time. It's up to you whether you want to give them things, argue over who owns the LCD TV, or consult credit card statement to figure out who owns most of the couch you financed. If you want to save yourself the awkwardness and arguments, you can always take the high road.
4. Try to move while your ex is out… enough said.
Related: Possible Run-in With the Ex? When to Strut and When to Stay Away
5. Know what to do when the ex sabotages that plan. So they said they wouldn't be there Thursday, but, low and behold, here they are sitting on your recliner you've come to take. Your ex might try to use this occasion to have one last argument. Don't get suckered into confrontation you don't want to have or rehashing old conflicts you've already been through before.
6. Rip off the bandage. If you can, you should move all at once, rather than in shifts. It all goes back to the resounding truth: You don't know what the future holds. A clean break from your old home will leave you open to new possibilities and experiences.
Once you move out, you can move on!
If you've been through a breakup, divorce, or just haven't been able to find happiness in your love life, BounceBack.com can help you find the confidence and strength you need to move forward. Check out our Facebook page.
More articles on BounceBack.com :
Every Thorn Has It's Rose
The Wisdom of Silence
Sole Meaning of Soul Mates?
5 Warning Signs That It's Time to Break-up
Sarah Rae is a writer and editor from New Orleans. She lives in Brooklyn, NY. More information can be found at readsarah.com