Did your ex tell you that he wants you back? Before you go running back into his arms, take time to make some decisions and create a game plan to avoid falling back into old relationship habits.
No doubt you have made some changes in your life since you and your boyfriend broke up. Perhaps you've started spending more time with your friends and your family. Perchance you've started attending religious services, or school. Maybe you've even started taking salsa lessons. The point is that you've begun a new chapter in your life and you may believe that getting back together with your ex (at his request) is a risky move.
It is a risky move. Take that phrase to heart ladies!
If you and your ex used to be joined at the hip, you ignored your friends and family or broke plans to be with your ex, they probably won't be too keen on the reconciliation. It's up to you to assure them that you plan to keep to your commitments to them. Promise your loved ones that you intend to retain the strong bond you have created with them since you and your ex-boyfriend broke up.
Now construct a game plan to ensure that you keep those promises.
Here are 7 things you should consider before you get back with your ex. Use these as parameters for your personalized game plan:
(1) I will create a list of items that outlines what I will and won't tolerate in any relationship. I will have a conversation with my ex-boyfriend to discuss these items. If he and I can come to an agreement regarding my list and his opinions, then and only then will I agree to a new relationship (this is so important if infidelity was the cause of your breakup).
(2) I will only see my boyfriend X amount of times per week. This will allow us to begin the relationship slowly and get to know one another again.
(3) I will continue to spend time with my friends and family. I will see my friends X amount of times per week and my family X amount of times per week. I WILL NOT break plans with my friends and family in order to spend more time with my boyfriend.
(4) I will continue my extra-curricular activities.
(5) I will continue to work on myself as I have been doing since the breakup.
(6) I will work on this relationship with my boyfriend as I realize that we are partners.
(7) I will end the relationship if it continues to move in an unseemly direction.
Create real goals. If you want to start a new relationship with your ex, then it's important to put all of yourself into a sound partnership with him. Write as many lists as you need, and refer to your "new relationship game plan" as often as necessary to keep the relationship on track.
And if you need more advice, check out brokenheartedgirl.com