Em & Lo, here's the scoop: I've typically been an early ejaculator and for whatever the cause (years of come & run masturbation, psychosomatic connections, lack of cardiovascular shape, or some combination of the three) I tend to lose my libidinous drive as well as my erection after that less-than-tardy grand finale. I've come to grips with this fate and am comfortable enough to deal with it openly with my sexual partners, to everyone's enjoyment. I've found that if I climax just prior to slipping into her little garden of nirvana, whether it be from gracious and wanton fellatio or my hand giving off an equally arousing show for her, that I can remain hard for dozens of minutes of intense sex. Unfortunately, I'm not immune to mild depression, which is the Kryptonite to even Clark Kent's libido, and does nothing for sustained erections for lay folk like myself. So recently my current partner and I toyed around with (apologies for the intentional pun) a vibrating c*ck ring that came with a box of condoms (be safe kids!). The ring was gelatinous yet still applied pressure to my penis, a fact that I thought would hamper my ability to maintain an erection: having a tourniquet-like device clamping down on the rivers of reinforcements seemed counterproductive to me. But I have just read that the effect of the ----- ring is just the opposite: somehow it knows to let blood in, but not out. Unfortunately, it didn't work and I couldn't tell if it was the ----- ring or just me again (i.e. physical exhaustion, defeating thoughts, etc). So I ask you, humble nymphs and servile catamites, do ----- rings really let the blood flow in, and hold it in until she's had her fill of rammed rod?
First of all, if you're clinically depressed you should seek treatment from a professional, whether it be therapy, medication (preferably one without negative side effects on your libido), or a combo of the two. Therapy might be able to help you with your premature ejaculation issues as well.
Speaking of, there are ways to help train your penis NOT to prematurely ejaculate, but it takes practice and discipline. You could try the squeeze technique outlined here.
Next, you should really try to get in better shape -- cardiovascular exercise will go a long way in improving sex and helping with depression, with all the endorphins and the good body image and the endurance it can give you.
Finally, let's all agree to call them "love rings" -- that has such a kinder, gentler ring to it, don't you think? Similarly, your use of the somewhat disagreeable term "rammed rod" makes us wonder if that isn't also part of the problem -- intercourse doesn't always have to involve hard, violent jackhammering to be good. Give your poor penis a break!
Impertinent Question: What Are Your Favorite And Least Favorite Terms For A Penis?
Okay, NOW we'll answer your question: A love ring can strap around a man's penis and behind his balls so that they sit in front of the ring or they can be worn around the base of the shaft, like a little belt (the former might be more effective). You put it on mid-erection, perhaps with a little lube for added comfort, and you don't wear it for any longer than 20 minutes at a time (half hour max). Because blood flows into the penis at its center and flows out through veins closer to the surface, the ring can restrict the outgoing supply without affecting the incoming -- and that usually means firmer-feeling, even bigger-seeming erections. For some men, it can make them last longer by decreasing tip sensitivity and helping with early arrivals. For others, it really INCREASES their sensitivity, overriding the longer-lasting benefit. Still others won't notice much difference at all -- in which case, it may just look pretty. But since a love ring does help to limit blood-flow going out of the penis, one may help him with maintaining post-orgasm firmness for prolonged intercourse.
Perhaps your free sample wasn't tight enough on you, and it let too much blood escape. That said, you do not want to cut off all circulation! Numbness, coldness, blueness -- all are things you do not want associated with your penis. A bit of give is a good thing, which is why we don't endorse metal rings that you can't get off in a pinch (should you get stuck, you'll probably have to get them off WITH a pinch from some metal clippers in the E.R.). Stick with the squishy silicone ones (or at the very least, ones that snap or velcro on and off). While we like the ones with little miniature vibrators for her, that may provide too much stimulation for you. Experiment with several and see what works. Fortunately, of all the sex toys out there, love rings are some of the most affordable. [Video: A trip to Babeland yields demos of unintimidating, kinky toys.]
But let us make this clear: love rings should not be used to treat erectile dysfunction...or depression for that matter. So even though you sound like you've got a great attitude, please talk to your doc.
Em & Lo
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