Technology is a powerful tool if you know how to use it. Unfortunately, celebrities haven't the slightest clue. It's been a year of regrettable tweets, career-ending emails and humiliating camera phone snapshots, all of which contributed to a record number of sex scandals. But technology can't be blamed for all the broken marriages and pulverized political careers in 2011. Some celebrities let their good old-fashioned poor judgment lead the way.
The Demise of Dashton
Ashton, Demi, her three daughters, and her ex-husband Bruce Willis were one big happy caravan until a few more stragglers hopped on for the ride. As the cobwebs of a threesome rumor cleared, another alleged Ashton conquest came forward claiming to have hot-tubbed and bedded Ms. Moore's man. Cut to Demi's slick divorce announcement and Ashton's "marriage is hard" Twitter follow-up.
Anthony Weiner, hairless wonder.
Anthony Weiner's Weiner
It was almost too easy. When the married congressman was caught posting images of his hot dog to Twitter followers, tabloid headline writers didn't really have to work at all. Then Weiner continued to provide new material as more of his electronic extramarital affairs, with six different women, became public. After the scandal broke, but before he finally left office, Weiner allegedly emailed one of his Twitter "friends", porn star Ginger Lee, about how to handle the probing press. At that point, you kind of wanted to take the guy's Internet away for his own good.
Arnold Schwarzenegger has a 13-year-old baby
After years of denying rumors of extramarital affairs, the California governor came clean about the love-child he had with his longtime housekeeper, Mildred Baena. "After leaving the governor's office I told my wife about this event, which occurred over a decade ago," Schwarzenegger said in a statement issued to The Los Angeles Times, which first broke the story. By that point, his wife Maria Shriver had a hunch about the boy, born over a decade ago, who looked astonishing like the action hero. After Maria filed for divorce, things got even uglier. Baena's ex-husband claimed Arnold falsified his love-child's birth certificate to cover up the scandal. And Brigitte Nielsen prattled on about her affair with the muscleman in the early years of his relationship with Shriver.
19 women? Really Jesse?
Jesse James proves he's not a changed man
It was the Facebook update that surprised no one: "Today I encountered the 19th girl to add to the list of people Jesse cheated on me with during this last year ." After a year defending James against haters, Kat Von D finally felt what it was like to be in Sandra Bullock's worst pair of shoes.
Your tax dollars at work.
The Craigslist Congressman
He was just sending a shirtless photo of himself to a stranger on Craigslist. What could go wrong? Married Congressman Chris Lee resigned shortly after his flexing portrait went humiliatingly viral.
The other thing Scar Jo and Blake have in common besides a hacker? Ryan Reynolds. Just saying.
Nude Photo Hacking Scandals
"Somebody stole my nudie photos," Scarlett Johansson told Dave Letterman. "They were out there for all the world to see which was, uh, unfortunate, really." That's not how voraciously voyeuristic Internet trollers saw it. Pretty soon her Smartphone snapshots were being ogled, imitated and meme-ified despite her legal team's protests. Earlier in the year, another hacker (or possibly the same one?) littered the Web with alleged photos of Blake Lively, captured admiring her own figure in the bathroom mirror. Unlike ScarJo, Lively went on record that the shots weren't actually of her, but by then a larger question had emerged: how much time do celebrities spend ogling themselves in the mirror?
Thumbs up on that flawless campaign you ran, Herman.
The Inappropriateness of Herman Cain
After a string of sexual misconduct accusations and news of an alleged 13-year affair bubbled to the surface, Republican 2012 presidential candidate Herman Cain finally dropped his campaign for the White House.
Fact: All three are human beings, even though one thinks he's a god.
Charlie Sheen's Goddesses
Remember when Charlie Sheen decided to take two concubines for his palace? And remember how one of them also doubled as his children's nanny in between her duties as a high priestess of pleasure? And remember how both goddesses were forced to kiss in his live show like two Barbie dolls mashed together by a crowd of rapacious Sheen followers? And remember how half the country was horrified and the other half was high-fiving and making t-shirts with the catchphrase 'Winning'? Yeah, that was something.
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