Losing Your Friend, Too
By Nicholas Lizardi for BounceBack.com
We all grow up with this concept of wanting to date someone who is a friend first. This is a great idea but sometimes it doesn't work out and sadly the relationship ends. Now both friends and even the ones who weren't involved in the relationship have to deal with the aftermath. It can be pretty rough (but by all means do not think this means dating a friend isn't worth it--sometimes it can end amazingly) but here are some options you might have to deal with when coping.
Try not to rock the boat.
Try to avoid doing things just to get a rise out of your ex. Chances are if this person is within your friendship circle you will see them almost daily. It will be a tough balancing act of getting over your ex and not wanting to make your friends feel uncomfortable. You don't want to create a scene just to cause a rise out of your ex because your friends will no doubt be involved. Pushing your friends away isn't a way to remedy the situation.
Hang out with new friends.
I know this seems like an extremely obvious solution - and it is. If you have another circle of friends, try hanging out with them a little more frequently. Your true friends will understand and try to balance friendships with the both of you. Do not feel bad about needing to take a step back. It is just needed sometime. Just take a breather and take some time to calm down. You can try to ease your way back in but let it be at your own pace. If your friends are going out to dinner or a party and your ex might be there and you think you're up to the task - go for it.
Related: Why Distancing Yourself From Your Ex is Important
Tough it out.
If you don't want to lose your friends and you think you're mature enough to handle it, tough it out. It is probably best to avoid hanging out with your ex one-on-one because things could get awkward. It's going to be important to keep up that line in your head of friend and more. Try not to misinterpret friendship and love. It is completely fine to politely dismiss yourself if you find yourself in an uncomfortable situation. Try to remember your ex was a friend at first. It is possible to get back to that point, but it's all up to you if you want to (and them of course).
Related: Impossible or I'm Possible: What is Your Break-Up Attitude?
The most important part of this situation is maturity. Know what you are capable of doing and what you're not. If you have the slightest fear of something you might not be able to handle, be careful. Try it. Learn it for yourself, but it's fine to not want to put yourself in that situation. It will be hard. It's best to be prepared for what can happen.
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More articles on BounceBack.com:
What Love Feels Like For Those Who've Never Been
How Important is a Friend's Opinion
She's Gone. Now What?
Don't Go Into Divorce Blind