by QuickieChick Laurel House
make time to make outGUYS: Enough with lazy bedroom techniques! Women love (and miss) foreplay. We also love just making out (without expecting sex to come next). Kissing, touching, licking and whispering can be more intimate and an even greater turn-on than getting down and dirty. Here are 8 essentials that you often seem to forget, but that will actually rock her world. It's time to get back to basics...
1. Kiss Until You're Sore
Some girls dump guys who are bad kissers, so get with the program. Soft, teasing lip kisses are flirtatious and let us know you know what you're doing. And don't stop once things have progressed to the actual sex; you don't have to lock lips the entire time, but check in regularly to keep her happy. Oh, and if you have dry, flaky lips, start using lip balm please.
But, never… attempt to force your tongue into a woman's esophagus - as many of you often do. Yes, you should use your tongue when kissing, but be conservative and limit how deeply you probe. To really turn us on, spend most of your time using your lips. That will help cut out all the sloppy wetness- another sign that you're an amateur.
Science proves it! Other than the clitoris, a woman's lips have the highest concentration of nerve endings on her entire body.
2. Keep Your Pants On
Remember how exciting messing around first was, when you made out feverishly while sliding your hands everywhere, trying to find a vulnerable zone in her clothing before coming in your Wranglers? So do we girls, and we miss it. While you may think it's logical to toss your T-shirt, drop trou and get naked once you're ready, we prefer to be seduced - or at least get a simulation of it. Spend a little time working your magic and then undress her, slowly. As a bonus, the more work you put in laying the foundation, the more she'll be primed to get buck wild by the time you do get her girdle off.
But, never… tear off a girl's clothes like a crazed, co-ed-stalking lunatic. Blouse-ripping may be sexy in the movies, but actors get free clothes.
Science proves it! Studies show the average man can get off in less than three minutes, while it takes women at least 20 minutes - foreplay is the fuel that starts the motor.
3. Keep Those Hands Moving
Nothing charges us up more than the feel of skin on skin. As a woman gets sexually excited, her blood starts pumping and her entire body becomes more sensitive to touch. Rather than clumsily sliding your hand up her thigh, hoping to take a shot at her fertile crescent, use your hands - and mouth, while you're at it - to slowly caress her arms, legs, feet and special hidden spots, like the back of her knee or the crook of her elbow. Get to know her whole body before you head for the gold.
But never… treat a woman like a rag doll. Running your hands lightly across her skin, using just your fingertips, will ultimately get you to your desired destination.
Science proves it! The time to go for her lady bits is upon detecting the official "signs of significant arousal." For the uninitiated, that includes heavy breathing, facial flushing, closed eyes, a rapid heartbeat, and moaning.
4. Don't Forget Her Neck
The importance of nuzzling her neck with light, moist kisses and gentle nibbles should not be underestimated. Try lightly blowing on the wet areas to give her chills, and don't get stuck on just the front - move around to the sides and especially the back, just below the hairline.
But never… leave a hickey, unless you have a Transylvanian zip code.
Science proves it! Lightly touching a woman's neck has been proven to relax and stimulate her, making orgasm easier.
5. Handle Breasts With Care
Despite worshiping them since birth, guys tend to treat breasts like a pair of punching bags. Think of them as testicles - really pretty testicles - and make your move accordingly. Women differ greatly in the sensitivity of their nips and the breasts themselves, but in general, we don't like purple-nipples, twisting, biting, squeezing or rough handling. Most women prefer licks, not like you'd give an ice-cream cone, but instead little circular motions, tracing the edge. Try cupping them by using your hands like breast shelves and applying light, rotating pressure. If she wants harder action, as some women clearly do, she'll tell you, but start with the idea that she likes it soft and sensitive, and work from there.
But never… ignore them. Just because you gave her breasts a couple of furtive kisses when you started hooking up, doesn't mean you're done. Women are more complicated than that, so remember to check in on her chest when you get a chance.
Science proves it! When a woman is aroused, her breasts (and genitals) swell with blood by up to 25 percent and become ultra-sensitive.
6. Don't Neglect Her Bum
Women worry more about how our butt looks than any other part of our body, so it's nice to have it appreciated. A sly caress in public is acceptable and even welcome. When it's go-time however, kneed it, stoke it, even slap it if she responds well. Just don't forget it's there.
But never… blatantly grab a handful in public. That makes a girl feel cheap, and look ridiculous to her friends.
Science proves it! Seventy-five percent of women aren't happy with their figure; butts are their biggest worry.
7. Whisper In Her Ear
Let her know you're as into it as she is. Add in nibbles on her ear lobes for a tickling effect. Dirty talk can also be a nice addition, but subtlety is essential. Even a quiet compliment in public - for her ears only - shows that you aren't doing it to impress others, only her.
But never… stick your tongue in her ear hole. Wet-Willes are for frat bothers, not bed-mates.
Science proves it! Complimenting a woman can help her become more sexually confident.
8. When It's Over, Give Her Space
The old adage about wanting to cuddle after sex is only partly true. Immediately after orgasm, we like to have a little time to relax and gather ourselves - just like you do. That's the time to give your girl a lingering kiss and maybe run your hands lightly down her back or through her hair. Since you're probably well on your way to a coma, lucky for you, it's all she'll need. Just don't pass out on top of her.
But never… leave your girl hanging. If you come, roll over and snore, she'll feel used and resentful.
Science proves it! Though only 29 percent of women have orgasms every time, 40 percent say they're satisfied with their sex lives - affection is everything.
Now get busy!
Laurel HouseLaurel House is a Fit & Sexy Lifestyle Expert, 4x published Lifestyle Author, NASM Weight Loss Specialist, and nationally recognized Print and Online Magazine Writer covering travel, relationships, healthy food and fitness (New You, Women's Health, First for Women, Men's Journal, Yahoo! Shine, Elegant Bride, Fit, Spa, Fit Yoga, Playboy, etc). Beyond writing, she has appeared as an expert on television morning shows including E! News, Weekend TODAY, The Daily Buzz, Better.TV, Good DayLA, CBS, Fox, NBC, and ABC Morning News shows both locally and nationally, and her YouTube videos have received over 10 million views. Her 4th book "QuickieChick's Cheat Sheet to Life, Love, Food, Fitness, Fashion and Finance on a Less than Fabulous Budget" was published by St. Martin's in May 2012. She is currently writing her next book- "Screwing The (dating) Rules."