My husband's brother called him five months ago and said that he couldn't handle his job anymore. So my husband, great man that he is, invited his brother to live and work with us in our business (with my blessing). Well, ever since his brother moved here, my husband has put me on the back burner. They work together every day, then at night, every time I try to have a conversation with my husband, my brother-in-law butts in. So I just go to bed alone. I've tried to talk to my husband about it, and he says, "I don't want my brother to feel left out!" I feel like the one being left out. What to do?
- P.C., 46, Northome, MN
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It's time for the guy to find his own place. You can't keep supporting all their guy time without it eventually taking a toll on the marriage. (Going to bed alone for too long is never a good thing!)
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Talk to your husband about when you can sit down as a couple with his brother and figure out how to help him get back on his feet. Stress how much you love and miss your time with your husband. Let him know that you truly don't want his brother to feel left out either - but that his brother isn't part of your marriage. The advantage of talking to your brother-in-law after you and your husband are on the same page is twofold: First, everyone is in on the discussion (your husband won't have to confront his brother, then report back to you), and second, you'll be able to directly express your concern for your brother-in-law's well-being, which will alleviate any guilt you may feel over reclaiming your home - and the privacy you and your marriage deserve.
Related: The 18 Most Annoying Male Habits Explained
Karen Karbo is an award-winning writer and author of The Gospel According to Coco Chanel: Life Lessons from the World's Most Elegant Woman. She's also a mom, a writing teacher, and a horse owner. Check out more advice from Karen.
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