Feeling Lovesick? Here's the cure your most pressing romantic problems...
Lauren...what's the secret to getting men to ask me out? I haven't been asked out on a date in over 9 months!! I don't get it. I'm 34, most people would consider me 'hot', (I've been told that I look a little like Eva Mendez) but I won't hit on men, it just seems so desperate. But I try to look cute, and go out every weekend with my girlfriends, but no dice! What am I doing wrong??
Marta in Manhattan
Toss 'em a crumb!Okay Marta, I suspect that you aren't following an up-to-date romantic rulebook, and are flirting like a 1950's 'Lady in Waiting'. Sadly, unless you get some flirt moves under your garter belt, you'll probably keep on doing just that...
Fortunately, there's a very easy remedy for what ails you...just go to the mirror and ask yourself the following question. "Is there any reason that men can tell, just by looking at you, that you're actually single?"
In truth, the answer for most of you is "Absolutely not!"
Man Fact: Single men often have NO CLUE that most single woman are actually...well, SINGLE, unless you let them KNOW that you are. In truth, men often have PTSD from getting shot down by scores of hot women, so they've wisely learned to minimize their odds of failure by looking for clues from you that it's okay to make a flirtatious approach. And if you don't, they'll just assume that you're hot, but are currently dating some Jon Hamm look-alike. NEXT.
Disclaimer: There are a slim percentage of Uber confident males who'll bust right through the 4th wall and hit on women in elevators, dog parks, and even funerals, (seriously, this really happened to me) but these equal opportunity Lothario's and their Peacock displays are directed at anyone in possession of XX chromosomes, and yes, even grandmothers.
SO REMEMBER: Most nice guys look for subtle cues from you before they'd decide to invade your personal space, by saying, "Hey gorgeous!" while you're zipping into your dry cleaners.
So, Miss Marta, what's a girl like you to do?
Your Love Rx: Toss 'em a Crumb!
You can trade in your chastity belt for a garter belt and date as much as you want to, whenever you want to. You just need to learn how to do one simple thing....
To up your odds by romantic success by 100%, just use the simple phrase... "Nice tie!"
This manhandling maneuver can be performed by the single woman, anytime, anyplace, and is guaranteed to transform you into the man magnet that you were always intended to be!
The very next time that a handsome man crosses your path, (and isn't banded!) simply compliment something that he's either wearing or doing.
Man Fact: All men love to be admired. They are totally motivated by it, will go to war for it, and build skyscrapers for it, so all you have to do is use this male character trait to your romantic advantage.
Casting a small crumb of approval his way will have an amazing "open sesame" effect on any man. He'll happily chirp away with any girl smart enough to notice his fine feathers...and his waterproof sports watch.
Man Fact: Men are externally referenced. They cuddle up with magazines about breasts, cars and guns. Conversing with about any gizmo or inanimate object is always the best way to draw them out.
WARNING: Never compliment a man on his physique! This will only serve to embarrass him or confuse him about what your intentions are. Unless he's 22. Then you might need to spell it out for him.
The secret to successfully breaking the ice is making sure that you're your compliment is always once removed. (exceptions: tattoos, and huge biceps. They fall under the purview of man jewelry, too). In other words, don't compliment anything he didn't have to work for, like his beautiful baby blues.
True story: I once said "Nice Tie" to a gorgeous man on the red carpet of a film premiere. He removed the article and proudly handed it to me, to the amazement of his little entourage (We had a fun date one rainy evening...but I'll tell you that story later! )
Manhandling Maneuver: Let men know you're interested by tossing them a compliment, and they'll fly to you like falcons.
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