Mother-in-law sends worst email ever to bride: forgivable?

beyond stupid! mother in law or not who cares what her opinion is, they are happy, she should shut her mouth its not like she is the one marrying her for the rest of his life!

Okay I hate to agree with the mother in law because I have had a few run-ins myself but I also agree that it is rude to go to someone else house and not eat what is served to you or demand you be served something different. I know there are two sides to this story but it seems these days, manners are becoming something of the past. Now to say that her son will be miserable was crossing the line and this could of been handled in conversation instead of attacking. Like hey "this really upset me when..". Then again is it wrong to tell a bride that the location she choose is expensive when the parents are paying for it.

Don't get me wrong...I still this day have run ins with my MIL. She crosses the line that the line doesn't exist anymore. It makes the movie Monster In Law look like childs play. But often wonder what set this whole thing off in the first place. What insult did the DIL say that offended the family and since when do you come into someone else's home and demand. Okay sorry I will stop my ranting

Well, in my Canadian home, guests may sleep as late as they like, I am a somewhat picky eater so would never hold that against anyone. At my table if you are a dinner guest, by all means, eat your fill, until it runs out. That must be why people like to visit us so much. Easy, easy going, who really cares about such trivial things. Especially someone who will be family, talk about pressure. That woman is just to snooty. Since they don't tell us the "joke" or "insult" we can't judge, can we. It doesn't say she demanded different food either, she just didn't like everything being served. I for one would not eat a mushroom if the Queen of England served it to me. Poor girl, that's never going to be a real relationship. She was there apparently to be judged by her new family to be. That's terribly rude and unmannerly.

From the sons standpoint I would have to say that he knows who he is marrying. And if that's who he loves than he should do it. This is garunteed to be half the story, but if one were to take it by what is written here I would have to say the mother in law is going to make their being together very difficult. I feel bad for the couple. The mother in law has ruined something that is supposed to be special. This is about the two people getting married and frankly she overstepped her bounds by a very large margin. This is not ok in my eyes and If it was my mother I wouldn't be speaking to her for a very long time. This hurts me even thinking about it.

I wonder what the groom has said about his step mother's email to his future bride...

this mother is forcing her son to choose, his bride or his mother. I have a feeling the bride will win this battle. His mother is going to be the big loser - she will lose her son, daughter-in-law AND any future with grandchildren.

Personally an email like that should have warned the bride-to-be of things to come. I think reguardless if the bride has the flaws mentioned (which honestly, depending on how you are raised, some would consider inappropriate and some would consider no big deal), this mother would have found fault with anything the bride did or does. I have a mother-in-law like this and for 20 years I've been insulted, blamed for any inappropriate behaviour that my husband may have done in her eyes (because he wasn't like that before he married me - right, because my husband doesn't have a mind of his own and I'm that big of an influence on him, please). This is just the start of things to come, so if I have been the bride-to-be, knowing what I know now, I would have put some serious thought into if I can or want to really deal with this crap. It's the old saying "No one is good enough for my son". And for the recorded, I have always just stood back and taken the abuse as not to make waves for my husband (I was brought up to respect your elders), however after 20 years, I'm now at the point where she gets what she gives. Which started when her igornace became directed at my kids as well. Respect should be earned, don't think I'm going to respect you because you think you deserve it. I'll respect you if you respect me. And BTW, yes my husband has stood up to her, but these types of mother-in-law's are "never in the wrong".

Mum is the word! Probably not the best idea to criticize over an e-mail. Did she think this was going to be constructive in some way??

This letter is showing only the future mother in laws view of things. She may be interpreting things incorrectly in her mind. (Who knows?) If she had issues with how the bride behaved in her home then she should have addressed it at the moment. "Excuse me, but in our house we..." is a good way to start out. But not say it in a rude or condescending manner. As far as where the bride and groom are getting married, so what! If they can afford to get married on the moon, then so be it. Everyone has their own views on what is their "dream wedding". I agree with what someone else posted here..they should elope. This is something that never should have gone viral. Pathetic that people have to escalate such trivial discrepancies in what they deem to be "good manners".

Thats just rude!! If you have a problem, say it to there face!! B***hes be crazy!!!

you cant serve your self twice in someone else house because its rude!!! whata heck what if your hungry i guess am rude:] she wrote the letter nicely but RUDE!!!

Even if the M-I-L had these feelings she didn't have to express them in that manner. She could have arranged a sit down with her D-I-L to be and had a candid convo with her without insulting her with an email that ultimately end up embarrassing M-I-L in the end. And now she wouldn't be welcomed at the wedding. And the groom.....What a punk!! Both sides are stupid.

Interesting there has been so much attack on the MIL without knowingor considering the other side. Maybe it has been blown out of proportion??? Reading through her email, did the prospective bride really act this way? If she did act as a bit of a spoiled Princess as suggested, I would probably have spoken my mind to her also. It could have been a one-off setting of boundaries that was sorely needed! Good to get some facts and both sides of a story before everybody leaps into indignant moral debate. I say good on the MIL for having the guts to speak her mind rather than biting her tongue, at least everyone knows where they stand ... a good starting point!

That was a very awful and tacky email.. I do think that if your going to be in a family some stuff needs to be hashed out if something is eating away at you. It should have been done in person and maybe in a gentle way. My mother in law always says " its not what you say, its how you say it" Seems to work for us :)
Besides... he obviously loves her and if he found all of that rude then leave it to the groom to speak up!

A little snotty, but knowing how spoiled girls are these days i can see the concern. If that was the email I don't see the big deal! Unless those things are true... then she basically just ratted on her by forwarding the letter. That's noone's business but her and her future husbands. I hate snobs... but not as much as spoiled brats.. sleeping till noonish? /punt GTFU and do something you bum. 29 year old kid needs to learn respect and stop airing family business. Ultimately it's the fault of the bum daughter's bum parents. Simple as that. I hope the guy grows a pair and repremands his future wife child.. before she ends up like her bum parents and repeats the cycle.

It's not exactly good manners to send an email like that, I think someone needs to go back to finishing school!

Wow mother in law from hell!!! It's the bride and groom that will be together for life and if they are happy then the mother in law should be happy for them!! I feel sorry for the bride and the groom. All the best wishes to you both and i hope you live a happy life together and don't let anyone ruin your special day and life!!

this is disgusting. i know so many people like this mother in law and if she had this much of a problem with her stepsons fiance she could have tried to talk to her in a polite manner in person and raise it gently about the way that their house hold functions because how the hell was she supposed to know otherwise?! all of the other things that she brought up are non of her business! if shes helping pay for the wedding and the brides parents arent than talk about it because its not the brides fault her parents didnt save for her. if she thinks shes after her stepsons money , get a prenup! but its between her stepson and his fiance. stay the hell out of their lives. for people who agree with what the stepmother said, your screwed up. theres a time to be there for your kids and back them up but going behind their backs and bashing their fiance and her family and ruining the wedding experience for them isnt being a good mother. her son loves this woman enough to marry her so if thats anything to go by and she writes this to her, your not going to be seeing much of your son

I think there may be two sides to this story! Generally, we are all looking at the situation from the brides point of view! There may have been some good reasoning behind the MIL's comments, we'll never know for sure! It would appear that the MIL may be footing some of the cost of the wedding. Personally, if the bride or her side don't have the income, then, they should have settled for a more modest venue! As far as MIL's are concerned, the sons or daughters concerned should grow a back bone & stand up to them!

She isn't his real mother. She's his STEP-MOTHER, which means she has no place to say this. I would be different of course if it were his actual mother. But even then she's a coward. If you think this woman has a backbone because she can send an extremely rude email to her future daughter in-law, your rediculous. Shes accusing this girl of having no manners, well where are hers??