I like to think that I'm a smart and rational person. I would never jump off of a building if I wasn't a 100% sure that the alternative outcome was worse than two broken legs. What's worst than two broken legs? Ending a loving relationship in the heat of an argument over a jacket. The jacket was NOT the issue, of course, but that didn't stop it from being mentioned over 10 times during that hour long blowup. A blowup that would have never ignited if I had said what needed to be said the second I became aware of what I needed to express to her.I knew a month or two prior that I was feeling as if she and I were intimately unraveling. We were losing that quiet passion we had developed over the years. A passion that hides like a cat waiting to pounce the second either of us walked through the door; and it wasn't a fast happening, but in fact, very slowly. Though, very noticeably, and that shook me. It didn't matter that I felt it in our everyday conversations or when we lay down for bed; I was not about to confess to her the reason I sometimes drifted off into my own thoughts wondering what would become of us. I was afraid, but I said nothing; and what could have instead been a heartfelt conversation, turned into a meaningless argument over a blazer she asked to hold. A blazer that I was on my way to packing up to hang in a closet we didn't share. What I needed to do then was SAY IT - say exactly how I felt in those exact moments.
I needed to say that it was me who was the root of that utterly petty disagreement. I needed to say that I wasn't being totally honest with her about my feelings in THAT moment or in THOSE weeks leading up to THAT moment; but nope, at the time, I kept right on arguing with her about a damn jacket - a nice one, but definitely not one worth losing my woman over.
Holding on to feelings, especially ones that nag at your heart, is NEVER EVER worth holding on to. It chips at your foundation every single minute it is not pronounced. If you are feeling lonely, you need to SAY IT NOW. If you are feeling unappreciated, you need to SAY IT NOW. NOW, while you still have her heart and attention.
I am grateful to have had a chance to say what needed to be said (some are not as lucky) to patch up the cracks by confessing my worries with her, to not hide them behind nitpicking and petty arguments; because issues, if not addressed after a while, causes resentment. To me, resentment is worst than a big booty home-wrecker.
So, say it NOW!! Because losing her is way worst than two broken legs.