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    Single Moms like Sex, Too

    single mom sexsingle mom sexThat how we got our babies in the first place, am I right, ladies??? A poll over at YourTango suggests that single moms are gettin' it on, which is very reassuring news if you ask me. 25% of the women who responded are single or divorced moms who have had non-love/non-relationship sex and feel it's positive to explore their sexuality. However, 13% of respondents said they don't want sex without love and/or serious commitment, so they abstain.

    Oh boy. 13% of you could be waiting a long time…

    Related: How I Learned About Sex: A lesson in what not to do

    I'm a divorced, single mother. After I split with my ex, I was so broken down emotionally, sex was the last thing on my mind. I know some people (especially men) are able to jump out of their marriages into multiple beds, but I didn't. Because I couldn't. But eventually I did want to start having sex again, and so I waited until the right moment came along and had a perfectly bland textbook one-night stand. And I'm so happy it happened that way. His semi-hard whiskey dick provided exactly the gentle nudge I needed to get back in the game. (He was lovely, the whole thing lovely and very sweet really, but in hindsight I think he may have been married. No ring though. Not my fault!)

    Anyway, the great thing about co-parenting with an ex is that it allows you both to have sexy time. (With other people. Not with each other. That's something you should never do! Though I did think about it once. I asked my ex to have sex with me and he said okay, but then we started talking and I made him cry about how he'd mistreated me, and that was so much better than an orgasm.) A few weeks after I popped my divorce cherry, I saw the opportunity for another one-nighter and took advantage. Eventually I started dating someone, and though it didn't work out long-term, we had so much sex. Makeup sex. Not the kind of sex you have after a fight, the kind of sex you have after you haven't had that kind of sex for years. The kind of sex that makes you happy to be alive. The kind of sex that makes you want to let your kid have ice cream for breakfast. The kind of sex where you're angry and crying and laughing all at the same time! (Oh, just me? Okay.)

    Related: 10 reasons he still wants sex while you're pregnant

    Now that we've stopped seeing each other, I don't know when I'll have sex again, and I don't really care. I like sex as much or more than the next guy, but I have to feel comfortable with someone to have sex with them, so that means really random one-nighters are out of the question. (And probably aren't very safe, anyway.) YourTango suggests "friends with benefits" as a healthy solution, but I don't know. So many of my gal pals have stories of those types of relationships going wrong. The common notion is, "someone always gets hurt," because it's hard to have sex without getting emotional (just nod your head and play along, fellas). So I guess I'll just have to wait this one out and see what happens. When my daughter's away, maybe I'll go to a movie with one of those moms who's abstaining 'til she finds true love. I'm sure she could use a pick me up.

    For 9 ways to spice up your relationship, visit Babble

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    45 comments

    • Griz  •  Basin, Wyoming  •  4 months ago
      Stereotype men much?
    • Brian  •  4 months ago
      This brings me back to a great experience I had. A woman who I was with for about six months did everything she could to trap me into being a father. It was funny how she would want sex two or three times a day during a certain time of month. I guess she thought I was too dumb to figure out that it was when she was ovulating (but us men are such simple creatures, right? I hear that thrown around here a lot). But anyway, I went along with this charade because hey, the sex was amazing! One day I cut myself and went looking for a band-aid and lo and behold what do I find? Several boxes of pregnancy test kits stashed away. That was when I knew her true motive. The fact that I make a six-digit salary probably was icing on the cake. Of course, I never told her I had had a vasectomy, lol!!! Well, after several month of her being "unsuccessful", she finally broke up with me. It was hard for me to not smile when she went through the whole breakup routine, but it was priceless watching her squirm in her chair. As far as dating single moms, thanks but no thanks. I don't need to deal with your screaming brat, and I don't want any kids of my own.
      • Silencio 4 months ago
        mama always told me ..."check that medicine cabinet".
        If this is true...it was priceless! lmao...nice to know you are not a sucker..lol...
      • ler 4 months ago
        So true. Single "mothers" are a waste of time. They're just looking for someone to support them and their #$%$ kid.
      • «¤|/|/¡NÐØ¤» 4 months ago
        "single mothers" are looking for someone to support them and their (insert curse) kid? Hmm. I wish I was aware of that. I would assume that most don't need your money Ler, seeing how they're supporting themselves before you got into the picture#$%$ if that's the sole purpose for single moms dating and having sex, then I've had it all wrong for the last 2 years.. WHAT WAS I THINKING?!
    • Doug S  •  Annapolis, Maryland  •  4 months ago
      Yeah, some single moms are having so much sex that they keep on having baby after baby. By different fathers. That they can't possibly afford to support.
      • Latina Libra 4 months ago
        It takes two to tango.
      • Ana 4 months ago
        Doug!!! Go suck a $^%$!!
      • Brian 4 months ago
        Oooh looks like Doug hit a nerve. Could there be some truth to what he said? I think so!
    • Minty Me  •  4 months ago
      Single Moms like Sex, Too-- well yeah.. Obviously.
      • H S 4 months ago
        They're all sluts anyhow..
      • lynn 4 months ago
        Where did you hear that...on a blog? I bet that attitude of yours was really cool back in high school. OOPs, maybe you are still in high school.
    • Anthony G  •  4 months ago
      That's it encourgae them. Like they don't have enough problems...what the hell is wrong with you STUPID people? The correct advice is to get yourself off until you find LOVE. Most of you can't have orgasms...why/ because you don't know how to. Practice on yourself, spent time find a MAN with qualities beside good looks and money.
      • Dawn Gemmecke 4 months ago
        I sincerely hope that you're not single because if you are, you are a hippocrite! The only difference is that we happen to have children. What, does that fact somehow make single mothers defective in some way?
      • Planner 4 months ago
        Single mothers are not 'defective" as you say. I found myself when I dated after my divorce that many of them didn't "learn" from their divorces about men. Therefore all I could see was them marrying me and repeating what that did with their ex to me and expecting a different outcome. When you approach marriage, IMO, with the attitude that the other person is lucky to have you, then you fail every time. What I decided was I wanted a woman that I loved and that wanted me worked best. I am very happy with my new wife because my wife wants me. She makes loving her easy.
      • NeikosGirl 4 months ago
        I have you a thumbs down Anthony because of your post. It was really judgemental and nasty. BUT, also, you do have a good point.... Just wanted to let you know I agree but disagree as well..
    • Steph  •  Asheville, North Carolina  •  4 months ago
      Pathetically tasteless and poorly-written article. This Yahoo author is messed up!
    • A Yahoo! User  •  4 months ago
      This is way off topic, but single mothers need to be careful. I've known so many women who were molested as children by some gut their mother was screwing around with. Yes, they'll date you to get to your children. It's very common.
      • H S 4 months ago
        Don't kid yourself babe.. 1st, no it isn't common you sexist pig & 2nd, I regularly hosed more than one babe that would have their female child present in bed with us as I penetrated her repeatedly..
      • lynn 4 months ago
        I bet you save a lot of money on condoms since your personality works as a birth control device.
      • A Yahoo! User 4 months ago
        Lynn, H S is a troll, don't bother arguing with him.
    • Elle  •  Baltimore, Maryland  •  4 months ago
      Wow. Hard to believe anyone would advocate random hook ups with no romantic involvement or be proud of the fact that they jumped in bed with someone they didn't even know well enough to know was married. If you are using sex a as a pick me up and delighting in making your ex cry while contemplating sleeping together again, you need some serious help. You certainly shouldn't be advising others on relationships.
    • Martin M  •  Morrow, Georgia  •  4 months ago
      How sad, the woman said making her ex cry was better than an orgasm. How messed up is it when hurting another person is better than experiencing pleasure?
    • ler  •  4 months ago
      Single moms like sex or single moms know that "providers" like sex?
    • DNR  •  Mississauga, Canada  •  4 months ago
      Wow, what the hell is wrong with some of you people, coming down on single mothers for having sex….we all have needs! You need to think before you speak, just because we single mothers are having sex does not mean we are on welfare or that they have numerous kids with different fathers. You don’t even know our circumstances so how can you judge something you know nothing about?Sometimes toys and such just don’t cut it, there needs to be skin to skin contact….Now tell me if per sae the tables were reversed and it was single fathers in this position, would you be saying the same things? Your #$%$ right you wouldn’t!!!!This is not the barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen days, us woman work right along the men. and should be treated fairly in regards to this issue.
    • anonymous  •  Lorain, Ohio  •  4 months ago
      Oh, great--yet another article on the benefits of casual sex and the "comittment sucks" bandwagon. That's what's wrong with society--no one wants to be responsible. So sad.
    • John Smith  •  Los Angeles, California  •  4 months ago
      From what I read about all the lousy sex that women are getting from men, it seems that they would probably be much better off just buying some toys, instead.
    • Kevin  •  4 months ago
      The family dysfunction story.I wonder what the divorce judgement was for him.
    • David  •  San Jose, California  •  4 months ago
      As someone who enjoys sex with single moms I say carry on ladies!
    • A Yahoo! User  •  4 months ago
      I can't believe yahoo is erasing my comments! SOBs!
    • Bob  •  4 months ago
      Ah single and divorced women. I am happily married and in my 40s, but was single through my 30s. I have to say, I loved so many of you single gals in my 30s. Some great relationships, some neat "friends with benefits" situations and some hot one night stands, a few duds, a few clingers and messed up types, but the good outweighed the bad. When I was 32 I lived in an apartment complex, that had a lot of singles who decided to form a singles group. Most of the women were divorced with kids in their 30s and early 40s. They enjoyed sex and missed it......a lot. I was single, decent looking, good job, no ex wife and no kids, no baggage. I was very popular. Had one of the best summers of my life.
    • Nick  •  4 months ago
      Doug, that's what welfares for.
    • Jeffrey  •  Marathon, Florida  •  4 months ago
      "That how......"?

      A typo or you are kidding right?
    • Silencio  •  Houston, Texas  •  4 months ago
      Single moms having sex..please use birth control... we have an overpopulation problem ....PRETTY PLEASE.

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