10. The relationship isn't THAT serious. In the beginning, you may find yourself in a brand new relationship, you're just dating but you really like the guy but you aren't quite sure if you want to be exclusive. Men, you better not take too long to figure it out! While you're out there dating or talking to a couple of other girls to make sure she's the right one for you, she could be doing the same thing! Unfortunately for you, women get hit on almost everyday, it could just be for sex or whatever the circumstance, but we get attention out there no matter what we look like-there is always someone who wants to get in our pants. Fortunately, we have been turning men down since the beginning of time. When you think you're not quite ready to settle down as you go from one woman to the next, you are really wasting time on the girls you don't really like instead of investing time in the one you really want. If you don't seal the deal while she's really into you, you just might blow it, and she knows it!
9. They are bored in the relationship. When women get bored with their man they may seek comfort in the arms of a stranger or an old flame. They get bored when the sparks no longer fly, if they're stuck in a routine of boredom, if their man isn't paying attention to them or they aren't having fun together. Women need romance, dancing, dinners, spontaneous getaways, anything that will keep them guessing and make them feel special. Women tend to place their man on a throne and crown you the "Man of the house" and "King of the castle." All we really want i the same in return. The longer you leave gaps in between the romance, some other guy may be filling in for you. When the man she loves is spending too much time and attention on himself or his other interests (Golf, video games, workaholic, etc.), it is a complete turn-off for women. We want to be the center of his world, the Queen at his side; translation: we want some attention and to feel important, when we aren't, we know that someone else will place us on their pedestal if you're too busy. You've seen the chick flicks guys, how much more do we need to spell it out for you?!
8. They aren't getting what they want out of the relationship. Most women want a place to call home, especially a house, they want a marriage or some type of commitment, and eventually, they want to start a family. If they have been in a long term relationship and nothing seems to be materializing from it, they will consider straying if they haven't already. Women need to know their place in your life, we want to know that you are in it to give them that happily ever after, and if you don't step it up, then proceed with caution. It isn't about sex, it's about being with a man that is ready to GROW UP and take the relationship to the next level. No matter what we say, we need the ring, the piece of paper, the contract, the whole sha-bang! We don't want to be your baby mama, but if that's what it takes to get you to commit, some women will take that route and make you miserable for the rest of your life, all because... you didn't give her want she wants or needs in the relationship. If men need food & sex, women need security and commitment. Remember guys: there will always be someone out there that will promise her the world and give it to her, so if you aren't trying to be THAT guy... she will go bye-bye.
7. When he has too much baggage. Psycho ex girlfriends, baby mama drama, ex-wives with too much control, a meddling mother, over-protective siblings, bratty kids, and friends that don't know when to go home, will take their toll on a woman. There is nothing more unattractive then a man that has too much baggage. Women will begin to take a look at their options out there no matter how nice or great of a guy her man is. A man can spoil her rotten, but if your family always has something to say and you don't stick up for her, you're in BIG trouble! Your ex-gf, baby mama, or ex-wife should not cause any problems in your relationship. What's worse is when you can't control your own kids, that is a major turn off because she wants you to be the MAN, not a doormat! When your friends come over too much or stay too long, that make you look like a high school boy instead of the man she knows you can be. You shouldn't be fighting about other people, there are only 2 people in your relationship, so schedule time with your friends or family and let her do her own thing. Whatever you do, don't keep repeating the same thing over and over when she tells you she doesn't like something (or someone), take care of the problem like a man, don't drag it on. We all have baggage, but when you really love someone, you will make the simple effort to make changes for the benefit of the relationship: its all about compromise.
6. They won't leave something for nothing. When you're just not getting along and you seem to be fighting a lot, fellas beware! Most women won't have a clean break because we need to "get under someone new, to get over someone old." That's right, this is something even our mothers and grandmothers know now days! That is why we always have a "rebound guy," AKA: the guy after the serious long-term relationship, before the string of one night stands and mini-relationships that will eventually lead to your new and improved replacement. Don't be mistaken, women are a lot more slick then we get credit for, and you won't even see it coming. By the time you're ready to "work things out" she may be on to bigger and better things, so if you know you love her and want to be with her, fix the problems before you get replaced. We think about our feelings and emotions a lot before we stray, by the time we act on it, we have made up our minds and moved on. All you need to know is that the plan was well thought out before it was executed.
5. Ok, sometimes it is about the SEX. If a girl is having trouble climaxing, no matter how great of a guy you are, regardless if you have a mortgage, lease or kids together, she just might stray, depending on how bad it is and how much she really loves you. If you can't deliver the kind of lovin' she needs, you're headed for trouble, because there is an easy remedy to cure that little problem. You will find that more and more women will have a Cha-cha, def: a guy she can call on whenever, wherever, to take care of her sexual appetite. Unlike a booty call, a Cha-cha knows you're in a relationship, he might be in one too, but he is readily awaiting her number appearing on the Caller ID of his cell phone. He is the guy that will give her presents AND orgasms, but he never calls her, she calls him. Men have their "old reliables" that they call when they are having a dry spell, but the Cha-cha is a special man that takes care of her wants and needs in different ways then a booty call and old reliable. He is there when you aren't acting right, he will console her after a fight, even if she doesn't mention a word about it, and he is there if she hasn't lined him up already. Remember: for the ladies, sex is physical AND emotional, be creative!
4. When things start to go sour. Let's face it, women need a lot of attention, we have feelings and emotions that run deep. If you forget her birthday, an anniversary, or any other special day or if you skimp out on Valentine's Day, Mother's Day, Christmas, New Years Eve or WHATEVER, she will feel unappreciated and that is the danger zone! If you are so caught up and busy doing whatever it is that you do, even if you are working a lot to pay bills and what not, at the very least... you better remember the days that count! The rule of thumb here is that you need to show your appreciation to her, show her how special she is and how much she means to you. Say thank you in little ways, because every woman will tell you, "it's the little things that count." The reason the little things count is because they all add up to one big thing: whether or not you appreciate her enough. If she baby's you when you're sick, packs your lunch, cooks dinner every night, or makes you feel special or gets you little thoughtful gifts here and there, she is doing her best to make you feel special, loved and appreciated. We will never say it out loud, but we're expecting you to do it for us too. Picking up some flowers "just because" is a great way to show her, taking her out for a romantic dinner will do the trick, getting her a card to say you're sorry, or giving her a little something because you love her, always work wonders. Men on very competitive, there is always going to be some guy out there that will do what you won't do and charm those panties right off.
3. If the relationship gets abusive. Don't think that you could ever completely control a woman. If you try to use scare tactics, hit her, beat her up, or threaten her, she can and will stray at some point, it is just a matter of when. If you are verbally or emotionally abusive, we may be the victim but every woman can be pushed to her breaking point until enough is enough. There are way more nice guys out there and if you didn't know this already, we have been trained to await our night in shining armor, thanks to Disney. You can beat us to the ground and we will pick ourselves up. Even though we love you and you hurt us, there is always another guy waiting to save that damsel in distress. We all know women talk, we talk about everyone and everything, so if she's with friends or at work spilling her guts out, someone will be more then willing to set her up with a great guy that they know and most guys would love to be the hero.
2. When she doesn't come first in your life. If you put other people before her, like your mother, family, friends, job, etc. she will eventually stray. A woman has to feel like she is your number one priority sinceshe is your partner in life, she needs to be treated as such, and more. When you're spending more time or money on your Mom, or something other then her, you will have problems. If you spend too much time at work and not enough time on her, there will be a big fight around the corner. I know it sounds selfish, but that is just the way we are. Think about it, when a man has a little girl, he is protective, he spoils her, and she is his princess forever. When Dad is around, she is on her best behavior because she knows that if she plays her cards right, she can get whatever she wants from him. There are Daddy's girls, and Mama's boys-there is a reason to that madness. You see, mothers make it difficult for any woman to measure up because most guys want a girl like his mom, and women want a strong, providing, generous man, like her father. There can only be one queen in your life, if she isn't your number one, she will belong to someone else in no time. It not just your mom, its also habits and addictions, like drugs or video games; she will find a more mature man that will place her on the #1 spot.
1. Whatever you can do, we can do it better. If you have cheated on us and we take you back, you better be on your toes every minute of every day! Don't think you are in the clear just because she forgave you, you better watch how she interacts with your brother, your cousins, your best friends, co-workers, and anyone with a penis. She will go for the jugular fellas, and I am not playing! If you break her heart and she gives you a second chance, she is probably going to start plotting the biggest, heart-breaking performance of her life. Just when you think it's all water under the bridge, you will find your heart ripped out, stomped on and spit on, under that bridge. Every woman handles it differently, she will either go for someone close to you, but she will be with someone else behind your back, whether you find out about it or not is up to her. She may take you back, all the while knowing that she has slept with someone else, because in the back of her mind, "what you don't know won't hurt." Trust me fellas, she will smile in your face and act like everything is normal, but behind that grin lies the remnants of a broken heart plotting away vengeance. You see, it is so much easier for a woman to cheat, all we have to do is say "yes". Men love the thrill of the chase, they are natural predators, and once they have a piece, they are done because the thrill of the chase is over. If they get caught it's because they weren't doing it right, they got sloppy, or weren't paying attention. Women on the other hand, are very detail oriented, if she gets caught, she probably wanted to. Women will sleep with a guy knowing he has a significant other, we are competitive in that way, too. If the girl you cheated on knew about your woman, she was in it for the competition, you really mean nothing to her. Women always think they are better then other women, even sisters are rivals, but you are the dummy that gets caught in the middle. A woman doesn't really want the guy that cheats on his chick with her because he will probably cheat on her too. Your chick will even the score or she will not have anything to do with you. It's all a game, and most of the time... it's the men that play the fools.
Women are not nice when you hurt them or don't treat them the way they deserve to be treated. They will strike when you least expect it, she will hurt you in away you never thought possible, and she will do it without a single regret. A woman scorned will do the impossible and the unbelievable, you will not be prepared for the atomic bomb she will drop on you. It could be days, weeks, months, years... but she knows she is in control and she will take her time to get you back. Let's go back to the beginning, remember how Eve convinced Adam to eat that apple? That's the kind of power we have over men. Anything you won't do for us, someone else will be more then willing to, and that's the guy that gets the trophy wife. A woman will love you wholeheartedly if you play your cards right, but if you don't, she will call your bluff and walk away with the pot, take your pride with her, and leave you all alone to figure out how the heck she pulled it off.
DISCLAIMER:
1st let me say that cheating is NEVER ok! This blog was written years ago as a joke after an intoxicating "girls night b!tch fest" in response to a friend's cheating hubby and another article we read about why men cheat. I never thought I would get so many responses/comments! Almost 2000! Very COOL! Some of you could relate, some were constructive, while others took it WAY too personal and got down right RUDE. Remember, this is MY blog, I am not trying to get on the New York Times Best Sellers List. Before you take yourself too seriously and act like an A-HOLE, keep in mind its just for FUN! I am not writing a book or looking for an editor.
Thank you! :-)
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