User post: Should I tell the new guy I'm dating about all my previous sex partners?

in response to urassismine2....Well said!!!!! I think those words come from a healthy and wise grown-up guy. (Sort of a rare breed these days) I, too, was more experienced than my husband Scott, and more curious. After inquiring about his past, I waited a short time then asked him if he was going to ask me about mine. He just simply stated "Nope...Don't care..that was all BS (before Scott). I could not have loved him any more than I did at that moment. That was 25 years ago, 24 of them married. In 3 weeks it will be 1 year ago that he passed away never having expressed any desire to know about anything BS. So my advice would mirror that of brokenheartedgirl.com... you could just say the number doesn't matter.

my suggestion for you ' Go a head tell this guy about your previous relationship and let see what his respond!' if this guy a good guy what ever you are he gonna still wants you. Honest to each other is the key of every relationship. If man or woman start to tell the truth about their past before dating or in their dating, that is mean they are want to get accept the way they are by their mate and ready for the serious relationship!

I think sex is every thing

I'm an older man I'm sure compared to the rest who have posted here, and so, I'm speaking from experience. I recently broke up with a woman I had an exclusive relationship with for 16 months. She was 11 years younger than me. When we first met and began getting to know each other, that one night came when the serious questions were being asked and answered.

I honestly didn't expect the answer I got when I asked her how many men she had slept with. I've been with 40+ woman in my life. She then told me she stopped counting at 100, but it was somewhere around 125. I was dumbfounded. I had already made a commitment and asked her to be with me in a monogamous relationship.

So here is my answer to you. First and foremost, honesty is a priority. If you are not honest, then you will automatically assume that he isn't going to be completely honest. That is just human nature and a fact of the way humans think. Therefore without honesty, trust will never be completely established. I didn't like the answer, but I respected her for being truthful.

However, as GBLover said, guys tend to "see" things in our minds, especially when it comes to our girls "being" with another guy, and I had to deal with that. So I did, and I was able to move forward because of that honesty. I trusted her, and knew that she wasn't going to cheat on me.

If your boyfriend asks, then ask him if he is sure he wants to know. Tell him you believe in honesty and will always be honest and faithful. If he insists, be honest. If he can't deal with it, then you weren't meant to be anyway.

By the way, that wasn't the reason we broke up. I simply learned and discovered over time that we were not compatible. It's an unfortunate truth, but that's why we date and then have relationships; it's how we find a partner we want to be with.

I have learned through experience and observation, do NOT settle for anything less than a partner who meets your needs and desires on all three aspects of who and what we are: Physically, Mentally, and Spiritually.

Most people settle for two out of three and live a lifetime together, albeit an unfulfilled life. When you are not in synchronization with one of those aspects, then there is going to be an emptiness, a hole that most don't even realize what it is or why.

If a relationship is based on only one of those aspects, it will not last.

So be true to yourself, know yourself, and know that no matter what, we cannot change other people no matter how hard we try. Find yourself, and you will find what you want and need in a lover, friend and soul-mate.

I wish you happiness, hope and smiles in all you do, everyday.

- Steven aka AwareOne

He shouldn't ask and you shouldn't feel pressed to tell. Prior to getting married, my hubby asked me and I said that who I was with before is of no importance and all that matters is who I am when I'm with him. If he's going to press you and make an issue out of it, find out why it's such an issue.

the truth will set you free!

I would leave the past in the past. My BF told me about ALLLLL of his ex-girlfriends (every single one) and it just sounded like he was bragging. Leave the past in the past.

Say nothing ... take it from a guy, we really do not want to know any of that stuff ... but we do appreciate you beign experienced.

Do not tell, Please... Your partner would only try to drive you crazy wanting to know what you did and why it failed , This is a new relatonship and leaving the mistakes of the past in the past and learning from them. Mums the word!!!!

no no no dont tell him.my ex told me i was her sec then nine years later she said she had to come clean.and tell me about her nine times.with other men.it relly broke my heart i never looked at her the same way. it hurt our mariage it was never the same.

If he ask you then tell him.whats in the past should stay in the past.

You should both talk about potential STD's and diseases that can be contracted through formal and oral sex. Personally, I don't think it's necessary to discuss past relations, doing so could cause problems. Just be sure to get checked!

the #of people that you sleep with is pointless if you love the one your with it will only hurt him to know it was very hard for me to deal with but if he grills you and you tell him do not let him down you for the past it is that simple

You should tell him 'cause he will be #16 soon...LOL. Then write again when you start #17...LOL

15 is a big number; it's on the edge of slut status.

DO NOT TELL HIM!! Believe me, he really does not want to know. He may say he does, but he doesn't. As soon as you tell him how many he's going to want to know names, and how many times, and if they were better than him. Just tell him that it doesn't matter. At the same time, don't ask him about his past either. That's none of your business as long as it's in the past.

RULE NUMBER ONE HONESTY ABOVE ALL ! IF HE ACTS IMMATURE TELL HIM EXACTLY WHAT HE IS ACTING LIKE . HE MAY JUST WANT TO ONE UP YOUR PREVIOUS GUYS AND THAT WILL BE BETTER FOR YOU!

If some men claim they don't want to know then they are not mature enough!!

Real men would like to know, period; when real men love women she could have worked at the mustang ranch but she would be his lady.

When you ask you women this questions any other answer besides the requested one (is not your bizz, you don't want to know, etc) is a clear indicator that she had a past she’s not comfortable with it. So time for you to make a decision...

Also the original poster already knows the answer, she had 15+ ( + could mean 16, 20, etc) while the guy had one or two...not to put a damper on her hopes but that's relationship is doomed from the beginning..

When I met my now husband. We didnt talk about this at first. He asked me how many and I told. That was my mistake. He is a great guy and we have a great life. We have been married 8 years together 9. I am telling you it will be a mistake to tell. He sometimes uses that information to chip at me when we argue. Save him and yourself from the hurt and keep it to yourself.

from a health standpoint? yes. you've been with 15, he's been with one. granted it takes only one encounter but...you know where i'm going with this. i'm surprised that the health issue isn't one you thought of first.