Women Initiate Divorce 66% of The Time: Why Do They Want To Get Married?

Women who divorce quickly instead of working (forgive, communicate, seek outside counsel, seek God’s guidance) on their marriage never entered the marriage with “till death do us part” as a commitment they meant to keep. They never allowed themselves to become a wife, only a concubine. The divorce papers were signed when they signed the marriage papers. All relationships including marriages are not static, but are dynamic, forever changing in degree of intimacy, compassion and trust. Sooner or later every couple will come to a “Y” in their relationship when they seek separate things. When couples start to drift apart, this is when the real intent of their marriage vow is made known.

Those who easily remove themselves emotionally and eventually physically from a hurting marriage relationship are deceivers; their true intentions become clear, their personal happiness is dominant, not the couple’s happiness, thus the two never had the chance to become one. Rarely does reconciliation occur because as stated earlier, the divorce papers were signed entering the empty covenant.

Those who are willing to work through hurting marriages value commitments and show themselves trust worthy. They are willing to learn to love their spouse as they love themselves. The covenant of “who God has joined together let no man or woman separate” was a personnel decision made at the time of marriage and is daily recommitted to. Only in cases of personal safety for themselves and their children or because the other spouse has broken the vow through adultery or abandonment and no hope of reconciliation exist is the marriage commitment not worth staying and working for.

Until the spouse that quickly divorces in a rocky marriage exchanges her “happiness” gauge for a “who God has joined together” gauge, will remain incapable of being a wife.

By the way, a man’s commitment “to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish: from this day forward till death do us part” needs to be an acted out commitment just as much as the wife’s. Working together for the same goal of being a living testimony of God’s glory brings people together making them greater than if they were apart.

As most of these responses and the article itself clearly states Woman have always and will always dislike other woman. Its natural behavior despite the freakish Social behavior now so common. Woman always complain about equality but this is one of many reasons a woman will never be a man no matter how often you tell yourselves you can be. Its a lie that has been propagated for nearly a Century. The evidence is in and Woman are not men... Whats the first thing Woman did when given the chance to vote? Wait till all of the men are away at War then pass Prohibition... How well has that worked out?

My husband treated me like crap until I left and filed for divorce. He didn't want to be married to me after I broke my neck, so he just said mean things like, "I'm gonna trade you in for a new model" and refused to have any physical contact with me for 4 years. He didn't want to be the bad guy, so he wouldn't file for divorce. I got tired of the abuse, got a job, and left. I asked for nothing except my freedom. So it's not all the woman's fault. Some guys just have NO guts to file for divorce.

Just look at the percentages, not a winning proposition for anyone. Reality check, it is not someone else's sole purpose in life to ensure your happiness it is your job, you may blame your unhappiness on your mate but most likely you are the problem. Cheating...don't get married if it's a deal breaker as you have already greatly increased your chances of divorce with that thinking....consider it a problem that needs fixed. Secrets men won't tell you...no man ever really wants to tell you what to do as you should be fully mature enough to make good choices that don't have a negative effect on your mate or marriage. Intimacy....women unwittingly fail miserably here....how....by sharing details of their relationship with their friends....now it has become no more than public knowledge. Outside forces and influences can wreak disaster in your marriage...marriage is between two people your so called best friend may not really be such a friend afterall....don't worry they will be there through the divorce with you because they like the drama at your expense.

Having worked in a multitude of differing professional environments for over 45 years, I have found that BOTH genders are just as likely to cheat on their respective spouses. And the reason is usually the same - disappointment with their spouses. A majority of the females were disappointed because they weren't getting their way all of the time and had to resort to threats, intimidation and ultimatums to get what they wanted while a majority of the males were disappointed that their spouses were almost constantly threatening them, trying to intimate them or issuing ultimatums to them. Since the advent of "No Fault Divorce" laws (which are seldom adhered to by presiding judges to the benefit of the females), the marital vow phrase "until death do us part" has come to mean "until I don't get my way." Males are expected to accept their female partners as they are while females somehow feel they have a mandate to treat males like pieces of fixer-upper real estate in desperate need of repair. There should be a law which prohibits marriage until AT LEAST 25 years of age and ONLY after successfully completing some form of extensive training to prepare BOTH persons for what is ahead for them after the "I do's." And part of this training should be a lengthy seminar and discussion with divorced couples so these marital wannabes can get their rose colored glasses knocked off of their faces by a strong slap of reality up the sides of their heads. And having children should NOT be allowed until AT LEAST 5 years into the marriage and ONLY after some kind of evaluation to determine if the parental hopefuls are prepared for and worthy of the fragile, dependent lives they are about to create. IQ tests should also be required before having children is permitted. Stupid people create stupid children who grow up to produce even more stupid people. This country has more than enough stupid people. Let's improve the intellectual quality of our civilization's gene pool. We desperately need to raise the intellectual bar in this country. And that's going to require some tough decisions and difficult sacrifices by everyone.

From experience, I think that women get married too young. You see, women change a lot over a lifetime, but men do not change as much. When women are young ie in their twenties they think they know what they want and who they are. At such a young age most of them have not lived enough or experienced the world as it really is. Thus, many young women buy into the romantic fantasy played out on television and in magazines. It's because often it's the most prominent role model they have.

They believe that marriage will be fun and exciting, and that they will always feel lusty and in love like they do now. Then ten years down the road, they realize how much work and sacrifice marriage and family is, and their goals have changed. They may not even recognize who they were at twenty. That man they were so in love with and worked so hard to get married to is now the man they can't wait to get away from.

I'm glad that women can now wait until their thirties to have children. This allows young women to find out who they are before making such a huge commitment. They can grow up before getting married and approach marriage with the blinders off...hopefully. I think this would eliminate a lot of the disappointment that women feel when married.

After my divorce, I haven't met any women worth going through the hassle again. It's far worse being lonely and feeling unwanted and taken for granted if, at the same time, you're with someone you're supposed to be feeling the opposite way with. As the song says, if I have to be lonely, I'd rather be alone.

When I married my ex husband in 1993, I expected to grow old wth him and believed in the vows that were taken. Unfortunately, he didn't seem to feel the same around 5 years in and the trouble started. He actually asked me and I didn't say yes right away-I was the one that wanted to be sure that it was the right step. We ended up together for 16 years, thru good and bad times, until a"trial" separation was mutually agreed upon. It was during this time that I discovered the other women he was meeting on chat rooms and he moved in with a woman around 6 months after separation. I had no choice but to file at that time and it was final in Sept 2009. I did not cheat on him, we both worked full time and I took care of the bulk of the household and childcare issues without complaint, and I made sure I showed him that I loved him regularly. He had some off and on substance abuse issues and actually once told me during one of his "use" periods that he was worried that by staying with me he was missing out on something better. Things kind of took a nosedive after that and he straightened up for a while, but sadly the damage was done after that statement. Sometimes we have no choice but to file for th divorce, even if we really may not feel like we want to. I just could no longer try to work on this with someone who was not willing. Not all men are forced into marriage-they want it and then may not know how to handle the responsiblilty that it brings.

Just wanted to add my "two cents" worth. I work at Superior Court in the courtroom and occasionally I am asked to work in the Family Law courtrooms. THAT is where you see good people at their worst! It is shocking and depressing to see how two grown adults who loved each other at one time, have two children together...a history together, and they cannot decide between the two of them what holidays each of them gets!! So, they tie up the courts, and court staff, pay exhorbitant fees to attorneys so that we ( a government entity, with no connection to those children)can decide that on even years, mom gets the children and on odd years, dad gets the children!! I know that sounds fairly depressing...but, that is life (for some people). Of course, they don't all end up in divorce proceedings, only about 50%. My point being that their relationship has deteriorated to the point that they can't even have a civilized conversation when it comes to their children...AND, yet they all start out convinced that they can work just about anything out! It is a sad commentary...Life is messy and not everything can be worked out. But, my bottom line is that I think that life is an adventure and I think it should be experienced. I believe in marriage, as my parents were happily married for 48 years, before they passed. So, I know that it can be done, it just takes a lot of sacrifice and compromise on the part of both parties. If one pary is not interested...well, that party will probably file for divorce.

I wish more women would become self reliant in diverse ways. Some women cannot and are 'raised' to be reliant on their partner as a helper and supporter for their own needs. This need in itself and IMO, is too, not a valid and good reason to get 'married'. And those who's secret yet incorrect motives in getting married, will these eventually end up in divorce as well. Where is TRUE LOVE, but yea I say nowhere in a world that has completely gone astray. A business Contract is what it is and I do I find, in this nature alone the word of Love never will be. To the never ending internal and High Society Competitions, therefore to the never ending of knowing what true love could be.

I'd love to get married. The man I'm with is the guy I want to get married to one day. I'm old fashioned but I dont really believe in divorce unless the guy is a cheater or an abuser physically, mentally and emotionally. Any other problems you can work out or really try to work them out especially if you have kids. I'd like to settle down, get married and start a family all by the age of 30 hopefully.

I never dreamed of being married. That being said I'm 23 in a stable relationship and in fact we live together happily for the most part. (give me a break its been less thatn 3 months since he moved in so we're still trying to figure this out). I don't sit and dream about the 'BIG DAY' either. As far as more woman wanting to be married? From my experience, woman are the ones who actually have the guts to go get the actual divorce. I mean he can just cheat and basically push her away all he wants until he forces her.

Well, it's not really a surprise now is it? Just from the few responses it's obvious that women feel (right or wrong) that they were disappointed or let down by their husbands. Also, I don't think too many men look forward to paying child support and/or alimony. That's a huge factor into why a man would rather cheat than divorce.

I got married in my early twenties,and after 30 years discover my husband was calling ,and chatting with internet women to whom ive spoken only to discover what low class no morals,no values,not to mention ,manners of any kind . My Husband Is an Acoholic ,and also has lots of other issues.I also saw pictures of some of these women ,and also of their children ... Its unbelievable how they can send pics of their children to strangers ,when there is so much phsycos in this world today.One particular woman sent him pics of her in so many hair colors and lenghts ,it appeared thats what she did for a living (swindle men).Because she was telling him in one IM that they could talk while they go through shoes she liked on certain page and they had them in all colors.He made lots of excuses but i told him what a jackass he was I could never believe him again if his life depended on it ,and of course I filed for a divorce .Its been 15 months and he's yet to fill out (1)form .He has since had problems at work and is now completing detox and rehab,if he wants to keep his job. I Even made all the arrangements for him and helped him ,even shaved him for detox when he wasnt capable of doing it for himself. But he still continued his addictions ,every chance he got .So you see the point ladies sometimes there is no other way .I even put up with his ensecurities and jealousy to the point he even through my clothes outside once an urinated on them (yes he did).The day this divorce Is final, I will finally be able to be me ,the way I use to be, and at last have peace .So marriage is a gamble and yes it can end even after 30 years . And not because of us women .

That is because men get you to break up with them so they do not look like the bad guy. they marry sooner because they already had her on the side, this is not rocket science.

Biggest reason I see for divorce is--they think that the man\woman will change. If you truly love the other person--then you fell in love with who he\she is--not your dream or fantasy. Trying to change somebody into who you want them to be or think they should be is a recipe for disaster. Reality will slap you down hard. I don't care that you have talked for hours about what you want or how you feel about, housing, bills, children--one or the other will more than likely lie to keep from arguing or making the other angry or hurting them. Watch the interaction with children, how they handle bills, house work--evidence is there rather you live together or not. Accepting others faults, not major ones, minor faults is a test of true love and commitment.
Can you live with these minor irritations? Will they destroy your feelings over the years. Is it a minor irritation or more important than you think?

If he doesn't give you small tokens of affection now (barring income) he won't when you are married, either. Is it important to you to have the small tokens (card, flower\w, candy, what-not)? If it is--you are doomed for disappointment.

It will be the small things that will destroy a marriage--money arguments are actually the result of the small things most of the time. Unless you or he spend money just because you want something and not because you need it or honestly can afford to blow it. Most married couples can't afford to go out and buy that new t.v. or outfit--but they think they have to. Status symbols are just that--symbols--it represents something to other people not who you really are inside.

why is it that people assume the ex husband will lose so much... I am a divorced woman 2 children i did initiate the divorce and i have never collected a penny from my ex and i'm the one who moved out of our beautiful home...The reason simple i'm the one who wanted the divorce. I was no longer in love with him. We now co-parent and get a long great. Oh and guess what I'd marry again

Most women want to fix someone, & most men marry her when she's waited long enough & she threatens to leave. You've got to keep moving & keep moving until you find that knockout chemistry. THAT'S when you should get married.

It's really quite simple. Men don't initiate divorce as much because why would they? They stand to gain more in marriage (even an unhappy one) than women do: health-wise and financially. So actually it makes perfect sense.... I don't really think it has anything to do with this garbage posted my the author. No one handcuffed a groom to the alter... men make their own decisions and to imply that they are too weak to think for themselves and got "manipulated" into marriage just says that they are inherently weak and feeble-minded, without capability to reason logically. That's insulting.

much more you sound like a winner...