By Tracy Verrett, BounceBack Relationship & Transition Expert
Remember being a kid and learning that "Mom spells 'wow' upside-down?" Sometimes though, our moms don't wow us in a good way. They may annoy us or embarrass us to the point that we're left saying, "Wow, Mom, please stop before you make it worse!"
In tribute to Mother's Day, May 9, here are seven humorous (or not-so-humorous) truths about our moms and our relationships. Whether these make you smile or cringe, we all know that these nuggets of truth make Moms who they are.
1. Mom wants a wedding. Now.
Mom wants us to get married WAY before we may have even uttered the word to the person we're dating. It's as if her role as Mom isn't complete without a walk down the aisle. One BounceBack member's mother told her, "You're better off married than successful in your career. A career will never cook you dinner." Hmmm. We could argue that a spouse is no guarantee to pay the bills, but let's just stop at the Mom-ism and leave it at that.
2. Mom knows best, because she's your mom.
Mom thinks she knows best because she knew you first. When you talk about the things you're proud of, like your new job, the deal you got on your apartment, or the vacation you just booked, she throws in lines like, "What about that guy/girl you were seeing?" or "I know how much you love (insert something from your childhood)." These are usually randomly placed in the conversation and usually have NOTHING to do with the conversation you were just having. The first question relates to point one above, while the second is her attempt of connecting with who you were, not who you are. She's just trying to hang on to the kid in you and her value as your mom.
3. Mom is always watching - and she can spot a fake.
Mom knows things she shouldn't know, even if you didn't tell her. Moms have a secret radar tracking beam into our lives and can figure stuff out we haven't told her. This sometimes includes talking to your friends (especially childhood friends!), exes, and anyone else you mutually know to find out information. She also has the secret weapon of intuition. When we say "everything is fine," she hears, "things are okay but they could be better." So, while we think we can fake it past Mom, the truth is, we can't.
4. Mom wants YOU to be a Mom.
As soon as you get married, Mom is looking for a grandchild. We've been taught having kids is part of being married, so as soon as you say "I do," she's thinking, "I want a grandbaby!" You'll be asked about this incessantly until you have one. You can torture her with calls like, "I have great news!" and the first words out of her mouth will be, "you're having a baby?" Moms became moms because they love kids. Therefore, it's only natural she wants you to make her a Grandma by having some of your own. Don't fall prey to the pressure. Raising a child is a huge responsibility and a life-long one, so make sure you are ready for this undertaking and do it for yourself and your new family, not only for your mom.
5. Mom wants you to be a Mom - again.
As soon as you have a baby, she'll be wondering when the next one is due. See above for explanation.
6. Mom wants your life.
Mom may live vicariously through you. Depending on how old you are and how old your mom is, you may have grown up under completely different circumstances. She may not have been able to go to college, travel the world for business or pleasure, cultivate friendships with people from around the globe, focus on a career and date until her late 30's before getting married the first time (think her desire for baby you!). So, when she hears you're doing stuff she wasn't able to and asks an endless amount of questions about what you're up to, indulge her. She may be looking for a way to live vicariously through you. Take it as a compliment.
7. Mom will always have a say.
Moms understand you're the boss of you at the end of the day, but she'll still put her two cents in whether you agree with it or not. She was the first heartbeat you felt, the first voice you heard and the first one to kiss your forehead. It's only natural she is going to give you advice, whether or not it's solicited. She's going to press you for information when she thinks something is wrong, and she may even try to set you up with the cute guy/girl she says hello to in church. She's your mom, she only wants to see you happy and will do what she can to help you get closer to your happiness along the way, even if it annoys you.
All of these truths about Moms are not intended in any way to say that Moms are a burden or that we don't love them. We know the cliches - "she knows best" and "she brought us into this world, so she can take us out" - and we appreciate them for everything they do for us, and strive to do as good of a job with our own children as they did with us. Moms are dear, sincere and genuine expressions of life and love. So good times and bad, no one can replace the "wow" a Mom brings into the world.
What are some truths about YOUR mom?
Tracy Verrett is a certified life, life purpose and career coach and is the founder of nudge life and career coaching, LLC. She specializes in helping people through relationship issues, life transitions, major decisions and career issues. Are you getting what you want in life? If not, you can follow her blog, Tweets, become a Facebook fan and learn more about Tracy at www.benudged.com.
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