Believe it or not, it's almost time to go back-to-school shopping! (No, I don't know where the summer went, either, and yes, the thought of stocking up yet again on marble notebooks and folders and pencils makes me want to take a sedative, too.)
More from The Stir: 7 People to Kiss Up to At Your Kids' School
But the scariest thought of all? Buying back-to-school clothes, particularly for teens. It's easy when they're little and there's no chance that anything you pick up at Old Navy or Gap Kids is going to get your kid suspended, but once they're old enough to do their own shopping ... fuggedaboudit!
All you can do is try to get a good look at them before they leave the house in the morning and pray they don't change into something offensive once they get to school ...
You know, like one of these t-shirts:
Good luck getting your math teacher to make eye contact with you when you have this shirt on, sweetheart. The only way to make this tee more obvious would be if there was a button on it that played "Don't Stand So Close to Me" when you pressed it. $7.50.
I'd like to buy a vowel ... because I'm not old enough to buy anything else legally! "Sometimes Alcohol Is the Answer" is definitely a message you don't want your kid broadcasting until after graduation, at the earliest. Preferably not until he's moved into a dorm somewhere and you don't have to look at this shirt. $19.95
More from The Stir: 10 School Dangers & How to Avoid Them
Okay, here's the thing: I sort of agree with this t-shirt, but I don't want my daughter to realize this harsh fact of life is true until she's well into her 20s. At which point, if she wants to wear the shirt, I won't complain. I'll probably even wash it when she drops her laundry off at my house. $8.50
Ahahaha!!! Oh wait, I'm not supposed to be laughing at the shirts. You've got to admit this one is pretty hilarious, though. And at least wearing it would imply that your kid had some sort of reproductive system savvy. I can totally picture one of my fellow Catholic high school students sneaking this tee under a standard uniform button-down ... and getting detention. $19.95
Would you let your teen wear any of these t-shirts?
Image via badideatshirts
More from The Stir:
How to Avoid Volunteering & Still Look Like a Good Mom
School Dress Codes Do More Harm Than Good