For some expectant fathers, being in the labor room can be a life-changing experience. For others, it can be a disaster. We asked four OBs what they would tell the FOB ("father of baby") if they got the chance. Here's what they told us.
1. Keep Your Mouth Shut
Doctor Brown:"Men will say inappropriate things about the woman's body. This is usually the really immature young dad. I have heard, no kidding, 'Her belly won't stay like that, will it?' and 'Now her boobs will get even bigger, awesome!'"
2. There's a Chair for a Reason
Doctor Pink:"FOBs climb into the bed - a single hospital bed. So there's the sweaty guy with his half-open boxer shorts when I come in to round. This is a hospital not a 'hoptel.'"
3. Don't Knock Over the Equipment
Doctor Blonde:"It's not enough that it's somewhat unhygienic, half the time the guy ends up tangled in the IV or something. More than a few times I've heard nurses get paged to untangle some dumbass."
4. Don't Knock the Rest of the Equipment
Dr. White:"I was doing a repair of a laceration from vaginal delivery and the FOB said, 'Hey, can you sew that up to make it a little tighter?'"
5. Never, Ever Mention 'The Tear'
Dr. Blonde:"It was like he was checking out the damage to his property. Makes me understand why so many lesbians go into OB-GYN."
How do you think a husband should act in the delivery room? Any horror stories?
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