Birthdays, cries and videotape


When you think back on your childhood, you can probably sum up your mom in a few words:

"When I was a kid, my mom was always __________."

I think we could all fill in the blank with some general statement about our mom from our childhood. That thought really scares me.

We all know how hard motherhood can be and we especially know how hard we try. We know we are multi-faceted, we know we aren't perfect. But how will we be remembered by our children?

As a child, my mom was responsible, loving and clean. Really, really clean.

I was going through family videos and came across Little BooBoo's 1 st birthday party, a tiny family affair. Despite the intimacy of the occasion, I have this nasty tendency to get frazzled whenever I have guests in my home, and yes, this even applies to family.


So there we were, getting all ready to sing Happy Birthday and Boy Wonder comes spinning into the room like a tornado, shouting and running into everything. After multiple failed requests for him to calm down, I snapped at him like Mommy Dearest...on video. GASP!

I've had my lion's share of shameful parental moments, but this one takes the cake (pun, anyone?).

Did I mention this was captured on video? Obviously I was horrified that I snapped in front of family and I was doubly horrified that it happened on video. I watched my mommy fail on a continuous loop about a thousand times later that night in the midst of an epic mommy meltdown.

Big Daddy P promised he'd edit out my Mommy Dearest moment so it would be like it never was. The only problem with his plan was that he never actually did it. Even if he had, it would never really be gone, only stored in Boy Wonder's iron-clad memory forever.

What kind of mom will I be remembered as? Frustrated? Impatient? Angry?

Sometimes I worry about that stuff. I know how I want to be remembered; I want to be remembered for the love notes I leave in their lunchboxes, for all the hugs and kisses, for the Monopoly games, baking adventures and bedtime stories. The problem is, we don't get to choose how we are remembered. I have to believe the tender moments will be remembered too, now if we could only capture some of those on video!

We may not be able to capture every moment on video, but they are all recorded in the memories of our children. The good, the bad, the ugly, the beautiful, the tender and the human.

Have you ever wondered, what kind of mom you will be remembered as?

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