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    Demi Lovato talks candidly eating disorders, rehab, and fighting back against the pressure to be perfect

    At the age of 19, Demi Lovato already has more than a decade of experience as a professional actor and singer in her repertoire. But her ambition and talent stretches back to a kindergarten talent show, where she says the spark was lit as she sang "My Heart Will Go On." By age eight, she was a part of the cast of the preschool sensation "Barney & Friends" with best friend Selena Gomez.

    As a teen, her successes piled up -- a spot as the lead in the Disney Channel show "Sonny with a Chance", a starring role in the "Camp Rock" movies, a top spot in "The Princess Protection Program", and two solo albums. She made guest appearances on shows like "America's Next Top Model" and "Grey's Anatomy" and spoke out against bullying on CNN. She dated Joe Jonas, and teamed up with him, Gomez, and Miley Cyrus for an environmental charity campaign.

    The Demi that looked shiny under the spotlight was really worn and broken underneath.

    In this month's Seventeen, Lovato reveals that the pressure to be perfect in all that success was so damaging it led her to complete exhaustion, rage, and finally a stint in rehab to cope with eating disorder and emotional issues. But instead of dwelling on the missteps of one more Hollywood teen who falls apart as she reaches fame, Lovato's chosen to partner with the magazine and The Jed Foundation to spread the message to other teens that "Love Is Louder Than the Pressure to Be Perfect." Yahoo! joined in, surveying teens and young adults to find out if they also feel that pressure and how they deal with it. Here's what our survey of 671 Americans aged 13 - 21 revealed and what Lovato candidly shared with Seventeen.

    On the drive that sent her spinning:
    "I didn't want anyone to be able to say that there was someone else working harder than I was."

    Among the female respondents to the Yahoo! survey, 74% said the pressure to be perfect came from within while 56% said the demand came from their parents.


    On depression and rehab:
    Lovato says she suffered with depression throughout her child, telling herself she wasn't worthy. Eventually, this boiled over and she lost control, punching a backup dancer.

    "I basically had a nervous breakdown. I was really bad off. My parents and my manager pulled me aside
    and said, 'You need to get some help.' It was an intervention. I wanted freedom from the inner demons. I wanted to start my life over."

    One in three teens and young adults surveyed said they have suffered from a psychological condition, the two most prevalent being depression and anxiety.


    On being afraid to get help for eating disorders, emotional distress, and a history of cutting herself:
    "There were times when I thought, I don't know if I actually want help because my eating disorders are my best friend. Looking back on it, I just want to cradle my old self up and hold her and tell her that it doesn't have to be this way."

    Of the survey participants, 60% of young women and girls admitted to having an unhealthy relationship with food and 41% said they constantly diet or think about their weight.About 15% said they hurt themselves physically. [If you or someone you love is cutting or otherwise self-injuring, SAFE has a great, supportive site with resources and a hotline at 1-800-DONT-CUT.]


    On how Selena Gomez helped her through:
    Lovato admits her friendship with Gomez was not in a good place last year. The two put that aside, however, and her best friend was a support during her treatment.

    "We didn't really discuss what I was going through-we just talked."

    While 73% of the participants we surveyed said they listen to music to cope when they feel pressured to perfect, half said they prefer to spend time alone. The third highest response, being with friends, tallied 46%. Females aged 18 - 21 are three or more times likely to turn to drugs, alcohol, or sex to deal with perfection pressure than girls aged 13 - 17.


    On the message she put on her wrists and the one she wrote on her hands:
    Lovato tattooed the words "stay strong" on her wrists as a reminder that healing and being healthier takes time. The "Love Is Louder Than the Pressure to Be Perfect" campaign encouraged her -- and other young women -- to turn around negative messages and pressure by writing this positive message on their hands with lipstick, pen, or marker. For more on Demi, the campaign, and pushing back against the pressure to be perfect, check this out.




    Also on Shine:

     

    27 comments

    • mistielovespurple  •  1 year 1 month ago
      The only thing I find ironic is how much makeup she's obviously put on for this photo, and the message she's sending. The reason so many girls want to "look perfect" is because they see how pretty celebrities are on t.v. and in photos when the celebrities don't actually look like that. The girls want to look like that. So next time Demi should consider going natural for her photoshoots, or else she isn't practicing what she preaches. Looks and makeup shouldn't be that important, and by putting so much of it on she's making it look like it is.
      No offense of course, I admire her and her ability to speak up and deal with her troubles unlike most celebrities.
    • Pedro  •  1 year 1 month ago
      i think she an amazing girl for coming forward with her problems she shouldnt have to explain why she going threw what she is and just take off , i think she brave and beautiful even if she has 1 ear a nose n 2 lips on her face anyone is i love different looking people n how they bring forward there own uniqe look its amazing how different we all are.
    • Jo  •  1 year 1 month ago
      I find it ironic that she is a cutter and got tattoos on her wrists. Anyone else see a problem with that? Hopefully it will remind herself not to cut herself though if she tries again. I love that she is being open about her recovery- so great for other girls/women to see she is real.
    • rokk  •  1 year 1 month ago
      a decade of experience.....none the maturity
    • Malinda Sizemore  •  1 year 1 month ago
      I admire Demi for speaking about this and her story touched me.
    • Bridget  •  1 year 1 month ago
      She is great! I love the fact that she's owning up to the issues she's had, but she's doing something to help others and spread her message. And I love the writing on the hands thing. Demi, you're amazing and very inspiring!
    • AYN  •  1 year 1 month ago
      I have suffered from eating disorders since I was 13. I am now 25. I admire her strength to openly talk about her problems and send a positive message to young girls out there. I admit there are times when I still get tempted to just get rid of my dinner or breakfast, and obsess over the number that shows up on the scale. It takes a lot of time and strength to cope with it. Yes Demi is beautiful, yes she is successful, but that does NOT mean that she can't have problems or inner demons within herself. All the money in the world can't buy happiness. You have to love yourself first, including your flaws, before you can really be happy. So stop with the "boo hoo I'm gorgeous and I have problems" bs, because unless you've felt exactly what she's felt (which you never will, because each person is different), you can't judge.
    • Dottithy  •  1 year 1 month ago
      I'm glad she was able to get help for her problems and I wish her the best of luck as she continues her life-long struggle. Maybe she will be an inspiration for girls with eating disorders to get help!
    • Courtney  •  1 year 1 month ago
      For all the people bashing her, just shut up and find something half as meaningful to do with your lives. She could've become another Britney Spears or Lindsay Lohan, but she's taking a different road. Just because she's pretty, rich, and famous, announced to the world that she had problems, and that even though she got help, she's still dealing with those problems, does NOT mean she thinks everyone should have pity on her. It also doesn't mean that she thinks she's better than anyone else because of her station in life. It takes courage to say "I have a problem" when you've really got one. Geez, people bash Miley Cyrus for acting crazy when she's a "role model" but give this woman crap when she tries to send out a positive message to young girls. Bass-ackwardness at its frickin' finest.
    • Patti  •  1 year 1 month ago
      This crap about "I'm so beautiful I have problems" is just that crap! How do any of you know how she feels. There are people out there everyday that others think are beautiful but when they look in the mirror they don't see it. How do you know she isn't one of those people? You don't, so quit judging. At least she is trying to do something good for the little girls who look up to her with her problems.
    • Giz  •  1 year 1 month ago
      Barbara, it's a shame that you are so miserable that the only way you can make yourself feel better is to get down on a 19 year old girl, under and incredible amount of stress who is trying to bounce back from not only having a nervous breakdown, but having to be under public scrutiny as her life fell apart.
    • szi9  •  1 year 1 month ago
      Oh boo hoo hoo, I am so gorgeous I simply cannot function! God! They have 'rehab' for everything these days! Most of these ego-maniacs need a good swift kick in the keister!
    • kaylan  •  1 year 1 month ago
      I aqree.!!
    • Phyllis  •  1 year 1 month ago
      It's best that one can recognize depression at a young age and be able to do something about it. Don't wait till you're 50 plus and life seems hopeless. It's important to surround one's self with real
      friends who can share their love and support to keep you going. We are ALL THE SAME, deep down,
      when we're cut, we bleed, when we hurt, we cry. And when we're angry, we retaliate. And we usually
      end up destroying a vital part of our selves, whether it be through food, drugs, alcohol, abusive people
      in unhealthy relationships. When one can learn to love themselves, they can also love others. And
      keep in mind, when you love who you're with, you're never alone.
    • pinklady25  •  1 year 1 month ago
      I admire her for being able to talk about her problems. It comes to show that even though she is famous, she is just like us. I have lived with depression my whole life as well. I am 23 and had a nervous breakdown as well. It wasn't easy. I don't have the money like Demi to go to a rehab center and get better so I basically have to find different ways. But it happens.
    • addison  •  1 year 1 month ago
      Barbara, you're an idiot.
    • Barbara  •  1 year 1 month ago
      hahaha, don't hate me because 'I'm pretty." Way to funny, this is so ridiculous on how this occurs to almost all if not most celebrities, and this girl thinks she is so separate from the rest.
    • Aurastar  •  1 year 1 month ago
      Not one for the new Disney, but I like Demi. :3
    • Ina Walker  •  1 year 1 month ago
      wow reading this really touched me
    • Ina Walker  •  1 year 1 month ago
      wow reading this really touched me

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