Food Fights - is the Dinner Battle Worth It?

turkey dinner with cranberry sauceGrowing up I had to clean my dinner plate or I couldn't have anything else until breakfast. I remember epic sesssions of me sitting at the table an hour later with a plate of spaghetti in front of me with the noodles growing ever larger from all the parmesan cheese I sprinkled on my plate to make it palatable. For a time when I was first married, we tried this same approach to dinner with our two children. Never a big eater myself, and noticing that my children were similar, the approach never really worked for me. Nor did I want to become a short order chef, taking everyone's orders for their own individual dinners, as I know some friends have done with their families.

When one of my children was diagnosed with a gastrointestional disorder, I knew we needed to change our approach to dinnertime, and to food in general. I settled on a hybrid approach, one that honored my committment to making only one meal, and that allowed our children to decide when they were full. I made one meal and everyone served themselves family style at the table. The rule was everyone had to at least try every food presented at dinner. If the kids ate all (or most) of their food, then they could have a snack of their choice before bed. If however they ate very little of their dinner, or not at all, then they were limited to a snack choice of one of the following: piece of fuit, string cheese (1), yogurt, or glass of milk.

Once or twice a month I have a "your choice night", meaning each family member gets to choose what they want for dinner, from what is readily available in the house, no take-out or extra shopping trips are involved.

My kids and I fight a lot less about what's for dinner and exactly how much of it they need to eat. Dinner should be a largely pleasant time to sit together has a family, not a battle ground, or a mediation session.

Do you battle with your kids over food? If you need practical tips for how to rein in your food fights please email me at jennifermagill@ezpzcoaching.com.