Giuliana Rancic, who shares both a child and reality show with husband Bill, learned this the hard way. “For us, I find, we put our marriage first and our child second, because the best thing we can do for him is have a strong marriage," Rancic told US Weekly.
The stars of Style Network's "Giuliana and Bill," have spent the past few years publicly airing their private life on TV—from their rocky engagement to their struggle to conceive. But Rancic's comment is might be getting more attention than anticipated.
It turns out putting your marriage “first” is still a controversial thing to say. Giuliana’s quote made headlines at The Daily Mail, Radar Online, HuffPo, and more. At Jezebel, Lindy West wrote, “I’m sure this sounds worse on paper than the way they meant it, right?”
This isn't the first time a "marriage first" decision has come under scrutiny. When writer Ayelet Waldaman, the wife of author Michael Chabon, wrote a piece in 2005 for The New York Times, proclaiming that she was more "in love" with her husband than her children, a media firestorm followed, with condemnations from mommy bloggers across the country and an invitation to the Oprah show in order to "explain herself."
To the mom of four, it's really simple. "If a good mother is one who loves her child more than anyone else in the world, I am not a good mother," Waldaman wrote.
That's not to say she's an absentee parent. "I spend a good part of every day: bathing them, combing their hair, sitting with them while they do their homework, holding them while they weep their tragic tears," but it's her husband's face that "inspires her."
What's so wrong with that? Nothing, according to David Code, author of To Raise Happy Kids, Put Your Marriage First. "These days, many parents seem to be married to their children instead of their spouses," Code told WebMd. "This creates stressed-out parents who feel disconnected from each other and demanding, entitled kids who act out."
But if you ask a few hundred commenters on the Rancic news, they'll tell you it's a "luxury" to put your husband first, and a mistake.
“I’m sorry, husbands come and go but your children will always be there,” one Daily Mail pointed out.
Everyone's got an opinion, but is there really a one-size-fits all when it comes to family priorities?
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